Does anyone else have a strongwilled 2year old???

Question

Our youngest is a very determind young lady..she's constantly not doing as she's told and we find we end up threatening the naughty mat/loss of a toy etc with nearly every request, which obviously we don't like doing...it's getting to the stage that her 4 year old sister is copying us making threats to her and we're getting exasperated as to how to get any form of co-operation without the inevitable threat of punishment/a smack or losing a favourite toy or missing out on something else we want a happy family life not a war zone... help!!!!

Answer 1

hey if you find the answer can you let me know PRETTY PLEASE lol i got two boys the same 3 and 18 months and i'm singel mum need all the help i can get

Answer 2

They don't call then the "terrible 2's" for nothing. I have 2 older children now, and one was much more "strong willed" than the other. Children need, and actualy want bounderies. She is testing to see what those boundries are. It can be frustrating, but it seems you are doing the rights things. Set your boundries, and stick by them- NEVER GIVE IN!!! While the advise of picking and choosing your battles is a good one, you still must never give in once a consequence has been determined, otherwise the only thing she will get from the experience is . . . eventually, she will get her way . . exactly what you DONT want! 8) Hang in there- it is a phase and part of parenting. I'm sure you will both survive 8)

Answer 3

have you thought of a reward chart, I know at 2 she is a bit young but some children are ready and some are not, only you will know if she is. The reward does not have to cost anything, a cuddle from mummy, a bedtime story from daddy, play in the park etc etc. Put a few simple requests on it (laminate it if possible) and show her every time she does something she gets a smiley face and the reward and a every few days the reward gets bigger. Also lots and lots of praise for the good and ignoring the bad usually works. Good luck x

Answer 4

My youngest is a VERY determined little toad! He is worlds away from his sister who is nearly 7 now, and I do not remember her being like it! I was thinking it was a boy thing, but I think it is a second child thing. He is almost two and most times completely exhausting. I believe that the 'ignoring bad behaviour' and 'praising good behaviour' works well but you have to be so calm and in the right frame of mind to execute it! I try my hadest to keep my cool and ignore the screaming tantrum, which usually involves toys being launched at me, turning my attention to my daughter usually evokes rage at him being ignored, but if I really stick it out and follow through, he does stop and then comes for a cuddle - he is beginning to understand that he gets no attention when behaving like that and I have to keep telling myself that it will pass! Raising balanced, happy children is a tough job! ...........!

Answer 5

The word 'strong-willed' is redundant when describing a 2 year old!

They're not called "the terrible twos" for nothing!

At two years old, your 'little darling' is becoming aware of her ability to impact on her surroundings - and she wants to see how far she can push - before you push back.

You need to let her know what is unacceptable behaviour.

Don't threaten, cajole or bribe her - simply ignoring her when she's naughty and showing her loving approval when she's good can be enough to show a two year old what's acceptable, and make her want to do it again to gain that approval.

Answer 6

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Answer 7

i replace right into a protracted nurser. My daughter, (now 15 yrs previous) weaned herself appropriate after her 2nd birthday. She's healthful as a horse, at a ideal weight, and regardless of being very energetic in activities has by no potential had a broken bone, even however she would be able to no longer drink cow's milk (would not like the flavor, says it makes her bloat) She's additionally an honor student, and could be graduating a 300 and sixty 5 days early. My son, (now 10 yrs previous) would probable nonetheless be nursing if he would desire to flee with it. i'm joking, optimistically you may examine the humor in it, yet heavily. He replace into 3 and a a million/2 while he weaned with some encouragement from Mommy....we did the do no longer grant, do no longer refuse approach, and it worked fantastically. He is likewise particularly energetic in activities and is particularly plenty an energetic boy, no broken bones yet. He additionally isn't a choosy eater in any respect, and is amazingly healthful, especially intelligent, too, continually gets all A's on the report card and is two grade levels (or greater) forward in analyzing. Neither of my toddlers have been "traumatized" via their prolonged time on the boob. the two considered one of them even have outstanding, at cutting-edge, healthful enamel without choose for orthodontia. additionally they slept with us up until they have been weaned from the breast. dangle in there. It would not final perpetually, and you're doing a solid element on your infant. Now that mine are vast, I wish we could circulate back to our nursing days....yet.....*sighs*.....all of us comprehend that's no longer achieveable.

Answer 8

It's called "The terrible twos" and pretty common at her age. Stop making threats. Stop expecting her to think like an adult, she is not an adult, her mind doesn't work the way an adults mind does, she doesn't remember five minutes ago so you really can't expect to NOT have to tell her the same things over and over. You have to be CONSISTENT and PATIENT... it is NOT the child who is making your family a warzone it is the PARENTS, this point is made quite obvious since your 4 year old is picking up YOUR habits.

Answer 9

My daughter is also very strong willed. We realized that out duaghter was not only strong-willed but had a huge independence streak as well, and that what we often viewed as tantrums due to this "strong will" were actually her frustration at not being allowed to be more independent.
At breakfast time, even though she was hungry, she'd throw a fit as i was getting her food ready. Now i let her help me. She sticks the toast in the toaster, (i push it down for her, and she knows it's hot and doesn't touch the toaster, i know some people are going to criticize for that one!) when it pops up, i get it out for her and using a spoon she spreads on jelly or butter while i finish up. No more tantrums because she feels like a "big girl".
She helps pick up her toys, i pick her outfits out but she gets dressed (mostly) by herself. If her daddy is baking something we let her help mix the batter. Potty training was a breeze once we got her a potty seat instead of a chair.
We also found that letting her mimic things we do helps. She would get in the way even if we were doing something important at our desk, so we bought her her own desk to do "grown up" things (really she just colors there).
Allowing a toddler to feel "big" or like a "grown up" often helps cut the frustration they feel at having little control over thier world. By no means is it a cure, tantrums will still happen, but alowing them a little indepence or control over what happens really does help.
Allow your daughter choices. Not, "what do you want to drink" but "would you like milk or juice?" or "do you want to wear your red shirt or your blue one today?".
Even allowing her some input on her punishments may help her realize that with misbehavior comes punishment but that doesn't necasarily have to mean a lack of control. "you know you may not hurt the kitty, now you need to get punished. Are we taking away a toy or sitting on your time out mat now?" that way, she THINKS she's making the decision, but really your still offering choices that you'd be happy with and are really in control.
These things helped with my daughter, but no children are the same so it may not help with yours. The only thing that can help every parent is patience. LOTS of patience, and the realization that it will get easier.....eventually.

Answer 10

my 2nd is 2 1/2 and very determined,pushes it nearly eveyday but i dont give in to him and as a result i can see a big difference in him his speech is greatand he has become a very funny character,just remember your the boss you call the shots,his sister is almost 8 and she was like that 2 now shes in the top 2 in her class and has her own identity and is such a character,you mould your children and be as hard as must even if you feel crap after but itll be worth it hang in there

Answer 11

yes my two yearold is very strong willed. i think they all are. just remember that she is only two. she is still trying to put two and two together. you can't exspect her to be perfect. pick your battles and she will pick hers. you set them up to fail if you lay out too many rules. avoid doing things that you know will make her mad. be sure that she takes her naps. and has full meals. most of the time the tantrums come around when the child is hungry or tierd. good luck.