I have a 22 month old and he is by my side always! When we goto the store and someone says hi he freaks and crys. If i'm not by his side, hes a wreak! He does'nt even want his dad, only me. Also he wakes up one or two times a night. I'm really fustrated and tired. I don't know what to do!
2007-02-10 02:54:17 · 13 answers · asked by Vanessa 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Toddler & Preschooler
The world is very big and confusing to toddlers, and they will have times when they are frightened that their parent will leave them. This is more likely to be a problem if they are tired, unwell or there have been big changes to cope with (such as a new baby or moving home). Toddlers are not able to tell you when they are worried or afraid, so they show this through their behaviour.
It may be hard not to feel rejected, or, alternatively, as though you can never get time away from your child because he is always clinging, but this is normal for toddlers, and it will change.
At times toddlers can seem frightened of people they know very well, even their father if they are mostly looked after by mum. They may be unwilling to go to their grandparents or other close adults. When near strangers, they will often cling until they have had time to check out what is happening, and some will not separate at all for a while.
When toddlers are around strangers, such as at a play group, many will not be willing to move away from their parent until they have had a chance to watch what is happening and what other people are doing. Some children do not move away from their mother for several sessions, while other will be able to start exploring within a few minutes (although they will usually rush back to mother if a stranger approaches them). Children are different in how confident they are in new settings.
Dont give up hope. Just keep trying and be patient. He will grow out of it. Boys love their Mommies for sure. Good luck.
2007-02-10 03:12:35 · answer #1 · answered by Mum to 2 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It has to start with YOU...us as mom of boys tend to smother then a little more, plus boys are whiny until they become teens, my 12 year olds still clingy, but I just explain to him that it is not comfortable all the time, couch one thing but then again he is very outspoken.
If you are a stay at home mom with him then introduce him to other children, make play dates, set him up for an hour with your local babysitter, getting him involved with other children is going to take the focus off of you. At the sitters you do not even have to leave...as long as there are a ton of other kids. This will help with strangers too.
plus you can "hang" out in the mall just sitting in a food court or somewhere a place that people will see him and speak to him, the more he sees people the more he will relax. Also give him money to pay for things while at the check outs. Get him interactiving with the people you interact with.
Best of luck
2007-02-10 03:05:28 · answer #2 · answered by ChelYox 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would try daycare for maybe a couple of hours at a time. But be sure to pick one you feel comfortable with. I use to work at a daycare and we had a child to come in who was real clingy like that. She would cry and scream when her mother would drop her off. The mother was always so worried and would stand at the door and watch (out of sight of the child) After a couple of weeks after the child realized that Her mother would come back and pick her up she started playing with the other children and soon started walking in the room by herself. I'm a mother of 2 and it's hard at first but sometimes we just have to push them just a little so they can learn a little independancy. Good Luck to you!
2007-02-10 03:47:20 · answer #3 · answered by superstar 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're going to have to be hard-hearted to fix this. You need to arrange time away from him...preferably for 2-3 hours a day. Can you get a part time job while Daddy is home?
It's the only way to make him better. He's going to cry & scream about it for a while, but he'll learn it doesn't do any good & settle down after a couple days.
2007-02-10 03:03:31 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He needs to be socialized more. Take him to church, the playground, indoor play parks at your local mall or Chuck E. Cheese. You could also enroll him at a daycare school part time. Or try setting up play dates or have a friend that has children watch him and you leave. He needs to get used to being without you. Or you could leave him with dad several nights a week. You should also try giving him some responsibility such as teaching him to clean up.
2007-02-10 05:14:20 · answer #5 · answered by LadyDeathStryke 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
my little brother use to do this with my mom. Hed cry and cry and cry when she went to work . Then when it was close to time to come home he would wait at the door for her. and follow her around the rest of the night. Im sorry to say he did it for a while but they do grow out of it. I remeber trying to take him for a few hours then he'd have to be back with mom. Now he can spend the night at me and my sisters house wiht out problem. Just give him time they grow out of it around 3 or 3 1/2 till then just try to hang in there. You will make it and soon he will be to indpendent and u will miss these days!! promise.
2007-02-10 03:03:46 · answer #6 · answered by fine_ass_fatty21 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Separation anxiety is real and many young children fear discovering new places without mom or dad at an arm reach away. They also at times feel real distress when a parent "leaves" them. In this article, there are some great suggestions about what can you do to ease your child into independence andkeep your and your child's sanity during these stressful separations.
http://www.familiesonlinemagazine.com/nanny/separation-anxiety.html
2007-02-10 04:32:13 · answer #7 · answered by Geraldine J 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A cloth diaper is what I used with my son. We called it his blankie and since it was small it could go everywhere with him. In the store he could hide his face with it or sleep with it. It was his security blanket so to speak. To get him to take it, we played peekaboo with it. I know material things are not good for children to cling to.. but when you need a break and need it fast you will try anything. I thought it was the best thing.. cause it was not a toy and if you lost it you had 11 more in the pack to replace it. I had one in every diaper bag and carseat. Good luck.
2007-02-10 03:40:46 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My parents used to tell me I used to be very clingy with my grandpa. You should try giving him alone time with other people and let him get used to other peoples company. Let him spend a weekend alone with a relative that usually helps.
You should also enjoy the fact that he likes you cause when he gets older your just gonna end up wishing you had spent more time with him when he was little.
2007-02-10 03:05:24 · answer #9 · answered by stevebass260 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Build up his self-confidence.
Let him play by himself at home, he can be in the living room while you are in the kitchen preparing the meal. As long as you make your place safe, please do your best to check less. Best to do this while he is absorbed in his activity: toys, music, activity book.
Do take note of your own responses, do you become worried when he is not visible? He may pick up these behaviors from his observations.
Speak to him as an intelligent being; explain why you have to do certain actions. For example: I am in the kitchen to prepare our lunch, please stay here; I will come back to join you once I am done.
Praise him for doing the desired behavior. If he does not cooperate, you need to make him understand why he needs to stay by himself. Smile: even though you may not see me, I am always in your heart; touch your heart area and then his heart area.
Please be consistent. In time, he will get to understand that it is all right to be by himself sometimes.
2007-02-10 03:09:55 · answer #10 · answered by tranquil 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋