2007-02-09 23:37:35 · 38 answers · asked by naghtynurse 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
This about about your friend on her big day - not about you. If you're a real friend you will wear it and shut up.
2007-02-09 23:40:38 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 6⤊ 2⤋
Ohoooooo!!! Why didn't you tell her? Okay that's my initial reaction but lets think about it? If you are her bridesmaid take it your are best friends? Therefore you should know this friend inside out? Is she a *****? Is her taste just different to yours? If you think she has purposely done this to you....wow.....what a position to be in. Although if she has you must know what like she is so why are you friendly with her in the first place? So lets take it you just differ clothes wise. How tacky and ugly is it in all honesty? Think if you walked down the street and asked 10 females to decide whether it was nice or not who's side would they be on? I can't say if you are over reacting or not. If it is really soooooooooo bad that it is going to show and you just don't want to be seen 'dead' in it you have two options - you think she has done it on purpose so be as big a ***** as her and tell her straight no way are you wearing it. If you think she genuinely likes it, she really wants you to be her bridesmaid either play along with it or as in NOW way before the wedding find something absolutely unforenseen that cannot be put off has cropped up (you'll think of something if desperate) and tell her you can't be bridesmaid. Don't worry too much about the cost of the dress,a good seamstresses can lengthen, shorten, take in, let out, add material so shouldn't cost her too much. I hope when you think about it your friend is really genuine and honestly really wants you to be bridesmaid and thinks she has chosen the most beautiful dress in the world for you. I wouldn't tell my bridesmaid (actually I've married for years and years and years) what to wear, I would value her opinion on the dress but again everyone is different. Despite the stories about brides being jealous the bridesmaid may outshine the bride etc, everyone wants to look back on beautiful wedding pictures and DVD's and it would really be rare for a bride to think this way.Best of luck!!!
2007-02-10 09:57:03 · answer #2 · answered by Ms Mat Urity 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
While I agree up to a point that you should do as your told for the bride, if it really is her dream, then could you bear it for the ceremony and change afterwards into something else for the reception. On the other hand, I am getting married in August and my bridesmaid will be choosing her own dress, I would hate her to feel uncomfortable on the day, and want EVERYONE to enjoy themselves- not just me! Does she know you hate it? And why? If you approach her give a good reason, be prepared to meet in the middle and have an alternative ready. Pick the worst thing about the dress; e.g if it's really ruffly and frilly and your quite a tom boy maybe try saying something along the lines of,
' I'm thrilled you picked me to be your bridesmaid, but I haven't worn a dress in years, I feel really uncomfortable in it- and be too fussed on the day to pay proper attention to what is going on, would you mind if we made the design a bit plainer please?
If she really is a friend she should see your point of view as well.
2007-02-10 06:41:03 · answer #3 · answered by emily_jane2379 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'll be a bride. I know my bridesmaids don't like the colour. It's pink and black! But, the style of the dress? Eh, I don't care about that. I'd be happy with someone if they said to me "you know, I'd rather wear this dress" because I'm really not the prissy type and I just picked the dress my mother and sister picked out! I don't consider my wedding 'my day' either. It's for the family and in laws to have a party and just get together for one night. The dress I picked is strapless. If one of my brides madis didn't feel comfortable wearing it, I'd let them all pick something else! So, my advice? If she's cool, you can mention something. If she's a bridezilla that calls it 'MY DAY!!" suck it up, it'll be over soon enough.
2007-02-10 01:04:45 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I'm afraid that we have all bee in this situation. It seems unfair that you have to be made to look like a Christmas fairy, while the bride looks like a movie star! But, I'm afraid that's the way it goes!
At the end of the day, if you agree to becoming a bridesmaid, then you agree to go with whatever the bride wants. It's only for one day, and chances are that the bride has put you in an ugly frock because of her own insecurities and nothing else.
Grin and bear it - you'll laugh about it in a couple of years
2007-02-12 00:00:57 · answer #5 · answered by fairyprincesscorinne 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am a bride and I would NEVER want my bridesmaids to look ugly by picking out an ugly dress for them to wear.
As a matter of fact, I told my bridesmaids/maid of honor that I want THEM to pick out their dress. As long as it is good for a beach wedding, and a solid blue color, and they would wear it more than once. Yeah I get the FINAL say in what they wear (like they are torn between two or three styles of dresses, I'll choose for them) but I really want their input. I want them to look AS GOOD AS me.
If it is all said and done, then you'll have to deal with it. BUT, if its still in the deciding stages, I'd nicely offer up other suggestions for a bridesmaids dress.
2007-02-10 00:32:07 · answer #6 · answered by Terri 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First off brides don't make their bridesmaids look dreadful on purpose, that would ruin the photos and the friendships so i'd ignore illyria6167 on that score.
One assumes that she is your friend or family member so you should be able to talk to her about it...just do so in a calm fashion rather than going in all guns blazing.
I am sure that if you are nice and polite about it the two of you will be able to come to an agreement over the dress, who knows it may be that you can wear something a little different.
We can only manage what we know though, so you do need to talk to her about it if you want to fix it.
But it is her big day not yours, so if you don't get what you want you need to be a bit mature about it and remember not to ruin her day by being miserable and difficult.
2007-02-09 23:54:50 · answer #7 · answered by stepfordswiss 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Looks its her wedding day dont make her feel disapointed and anyway the wedding day is all about the bride not the brides made just give that day to her and after a few months tell her what u felt about the dress, u shud be honoured be be brides maid
2007-02-09 23:42:44 · answer #8 · answered by Chequinah C 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My best friend picked out a bridesmaid dress that I absolutely hated and despised, but I wore it with pride and a smile as
I walked down the aisle at her wedding. She's the one who will look back at the pictures with love and appreciation for everyone that was there. When you get married, you can do whatever your hearts desires, because someone may think that about your bridesmaid dresses someday!
2007-02-10 05:48:56 · answer #9 · answered by Bridget C 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know if she is doing it because she doesn't want everyone to look as good as her or what but you are the bridesmaid and that kind of means advisor in this case so you should tell her how you feel about it.
I want everyone in my wedding party to look gorgeous so maybe she just needs your advice. You should gently bring it up and tell her how you feel. If it's the cut you don't like and the dress has already been purchased, that can easily be fixed.
She may want your input but she doesn't know how to ask. I think every bride wants their wedding to be perfect so you should tell her before it is too late.
2007-02-10 03:46:47 · answer #10 · answered by KJ 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
As an upcoming bride-to-be I would definately want my bridesmaid telling me if she hated her dress, I want my wedding photo's to be gorgeous so my bridesmaid has to be gorgeous aswell, she probably has no taste so needs your advice, you will regret not telling her as you'll feel like crap all day while people are commenting on how horrible your dress is, you have nothing to loose, she may be upset for a while but believe me it'll be worth it, you should look on www.houseofbrides.com, click bridesmaid dresses and Bari Jay has some gorgeous dresses, mine is no 621 i think, in chocolate brown, my sister loves it and its beautiful on her, it would give you an idea of the sort of dress you would like, good luck
2007-02-09 23:53:57 · answer #11 · answered by ✿Regina Felangie✿ 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋