So about a month ago I decided to ask an old coworker out to the movies since all my friends punked out on me. I figured..meh he was always calling to see if I wanted to hang out so why not just go to the movies with him.
Then he confesses to me he likes me more than just a friend/ex co worker and would like to date me and I staright told him I am not looking for any type of involvement (which is true). Plus he is really not my type for me to budge and give in.
He proceeded to say "I will take ever you can give, even it its just friendship I would like us to hang out."
I dont want that coz I feel bad, dont want to lead him on and we don't even have a friend like chemistry.
What is the best way for me to say no to him coz he keeps calling or texting me?
2007-02-09 08:58:29 · 15 answers · asked by Pudge_Monsta 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Wow. Well, he probably thinks that when you are looking for involvement you may change your mind about him. I am not sure how you can tell him no now without hurting him. It is kind of hard to say that you don't even want to be someone's friend. You may just have to tone it down slowly. If he wants to hang out, just tell him no. Don't say you are busy or he will look for another time to try. Answer his texts because you do not want to be rude, but don't be indepth which will cause him to text more and more.
Try not to be rude, but in the end you just might have to be blunt.
I can say that if this comes up sometime again with another friend, you not say you aren't looking for any type of involvement (even if it is true), but that you are not interested in them that way.
2007-02-09 09:05:00 · answer #1 · answered by kalea_kane 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are not leading him on if you told him already that you are not looking for that kind of relationship. There is nothing wrong with having a friend, he is probably lonely and just wants a friend. If you didn't want a friend than you shouldn't of asked him to go to a movie. What do you have against friendship, all the friends you can get the better off you will be. Maybe he just needs a best friend and there is nothing wrong with that. Treat him as just a friend and before you continue tell him that this will never been more than friendship because you do not feel that way about him. If he accepts that, then be friends, it doesn't mean you are leading him on. I have a male friend and I appriciate his opinion. Learn to love friends and be a friend. You will be a good friend to a partner, but its different. Take care Heather
2007-02-09 17:16:31 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him you don't want to ruin the friendship you now have, and that you would feel more comfortable just keeping it a co-worker friendship, (which doesn't require hanging out).
Tell him you want to be free to hang out with lots of people and that it just would not work to hang out with him again, and that you will see him at work and that is it.
So sorry...Good luck to you
2007-02-09 17:05:42 · answer #3 · answered by Ellyn 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him your not looking for a relationship but you wouldnt mind being friends that you have lots of friends so your time is limited. Maybe try to set up some kind of "date" on a friendship level and invite a friend you think might hit it off with him. OOO lol and always look bored while with him! lol kidding
2007-02-09 17:04:09 · answer #4 · answered by letthepartybeginnow 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Avoid him, don't respond to him trying to be nice. You need to do your part and I know it is hard but it comes down to leading on if you want to be nice about it and are not really honest with him for fear of his feelings. He'll get over it, and respect you much more than if you not knowingly lead him on. Also a good way is to tell him you are seeing someone else and want to see where it goes, this way he is let down easy and will understand, but don't leave the door open for him.
2007-02-09 17:03:45 · answer #5 · answered by St.Jeb 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can still call and hang out just keep it strictly on a friendship level. That means absolutely no flirting or teasing on your part whatsoever. If he starts to do or say anything just keep reminding him that you're just friends. Eventually he will accept it or choose to not hang out with you anymore.
2007-02-09 17:03:13 · answer #6 · answered by mypassions4life 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell him you don't want to hurt his feelings, but your new boyfriend is giving you flack because you keep getting messages from another man.
2007-02-09 17:02:43 · answer #7 · answered by sassy_395 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
it sounds like you already told him how you feel- that you weren't into a relationship with him. you can either keep acting 'busy' when he texts, or just stop replying at all...he'll eventually get the hint.
2007-02-09 17:01:50 · answer #8 · answered by 1912 Hudson 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you could just tell him hes cool and all but you want to keep it as friends.hell understand you.better friends than nothing at all. and change your number if he keeps callin or texting.just do wats right for you not for him.
2007-02-09 17:06:33 · answer #9 · answered by DANiiA D 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Lead him on so that he will try to kiss you. Then, when he does that you smack the living daylights out of him.
2007-02-09 17:02:19 · answer #10 · answered by Triple Nipple 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋