My girl and I have been together for about 14 months, I'm 19 she's 18. The past few months have been rough on our relationship as we haven't quite been our normal happy selves together and it finally got to the point where she said she needs space to be alone and get happy again. I want to give her space it's just so tough because she means the world to me and I don't want to push her away, but it's scary when you've depended on that one person for so long and they need a break. It's just rough because giving her space means giving her time and for me every minute seems like an hour and every hour seems like a day - the nights are longer and nothing tastes good to eat. It just sucks knowing that you've taken the other person for granted and know it will be better the second time around, it's just hard to wait when I'm hurting so bad. Any suggestions? I mean would not talking for a week or something been a good idea?
2007-02-09 05:05:23 · 8 answers · asked by DontWorryBeHappy 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
taking time apart is usually just a beginning to a break up if not the break up itself, time to move on.
2007-02-09 05:08:33 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You know, when a girl needs space, you need to give it to her. She will appreciate that you are listening to and respecting her needs. Still, speaking for myself, when I need space, if I am given total space, without so much as any kind of communication to "check in" with me, then I tend to think my fiance doesn't care. Fortunately, I rarely need space, and fortunately, we read each other well and know what the other person needs. I think it might be appropriate to drop your girlfriend a card or note in the mail. Keep it VERY brief. Tell her you just wanted her to know that you love her and are thinking about her and that you respect her need for space. Tell her she can have all the time she needs and that you will be there for her if she ever needs to talk. Don't say anything else. Keep it simple. By keeping it simple, you are not giving her extra "stuff" to think about that could complicate her already muddled up emotions. By sending her a note instead of calling her, you are showing her that you are respecting her space (she can read the note on HER terms and HER time, whereas a visit in person or a phone call interrupts her space). You are also showing her that you still care, and that while you are giving her time to sort things out, you want her to know that you are not leaving her just because she is taking a break. She might need that little bit of reassurance. Now, if you do this and she doesn't respond well, then you could take that to mean that it is possible that while she has been having her space, she has been re-evaluating the relationship and has made some decisions regarding it. Either way, it can really hurt to be the one who is waiting for a loved one to return to them. Still, if she ends up not "coming back" to you, then you will need to allow yourself to hurt, and then move on. You sound like a very nice guy, and I am sure there will be other girls, when you are ready, who will appreciate that quality in you. Best wishes for you.
2007-02-09 13:20:28 · answer #2 · answered by Chimichanga to go please!! 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know that you are hurting. But you need to realize that this relationship is over. Do not prolong your agony by trying to "talk" her back into the relationship etc..
You two obviously do not feel the same way about each other. Let her go. Do not call. Do not see her. Every time you do, you will have to go through the initial misery all over again. I have a feeling you think I'm wrong. I also have a feeling that you have a tough road ahead of you for some time. But time will ease the pain.
You will love again.
2007-02-09 13:14:53 · answer #3 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dude...i'm sorry, your girl doesnt want to be with you anymore...you can approach this in a couple of ways...give her some space twidle your thumbs for weeks and then in the end you break up anyways...cause, 'needing space!!', you dont need space from someone that you love whole-heartedly.
i'll give you the greatest advice, that, if there is love left in your relationship will workout the best, and don't let some girl on here tell you otherwise...
turn it on its head and leave them confused...break up with her...let her know "she'll have all the space she needs" that gives her the chance to deal with the grief too, and if in the end she misses you like crazy, she'll be back...but on the other hand, if whats happening here is what i really think it is...she'll move on and be grateful that you made it easier for her, cause breaking up with someone can be so hard, they feel they need to do it in stages...
just think of how you would feel, if u gave her "her space" and then find out she is with someone else...or that she doesnt want that space to end...seperating really is just a bad excuse for...i want to break up..and why should you waste your time and emotions waiting around growing cob webs...your young, have fun, there is a lot of seed still to be thrown around...
good luck
2007-02-09 13:16:43 · answer #4 · answered by boosted 1 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you don't give her the space she needs you will lose her for sure. You may lose her even if you do give her the space. But the gamble is worth it, because you will lose her one way and the other way she will be with you if it is workable.
2007-02-09 13:10:34 · answer #5 · answered by CL R 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Grow a back bone and realize that things have not been working right and that you both need the break.
2007-02-09 13:11:33 · answer #6 · answered by WENDY G 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
when a girl usual say she need space means she wanna see other people
2007-02-09 13:10:12 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to tell her everything you just typed. Tell her exactly how you feel. It will show her you care about her too much to just let her go. Go get her, man!
Good luck.
2007-02-09 13:11:59 · answer #8 · answered by aero 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋