I was hiding things about my past to my boyfriend and was lying to him about some sexual things i have done. Nohting really bad but stupid things like if I had my shirt on or off. But i started lying to him at the beginning of the relationship and i would swear to him i was telling the truth. well the reason i did that was because i was so scared that he wouldnt like me becuase he is the best thing to ever happen to me . well then i started slowly telling him the truth ....and then i would promise that there was nothing else because at that time i couldnt think of anything, well now i finally told him everything last night and he doesnt believe me. well that is understandable but i love him so muchand i dont know what to do to prove to him that htis is everything. please help it is an emergency!
2007-02-09 03:58:12 · 16 answers · asked by greendaymgn 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
well he keeps asking me stupid things to like how fast they went or if i took off my pants first,. i tell him that i dont like to htink about it and it reallyhurts
2007-02-09 04:12:06 · update #1
Yeah I've done this. Well, if he hasn't said anything indicating that he is going to terminate the relationship there isn't much to worry about. There's not much you can do either. I would say give him a few days to process everything. And then talk about it later. Guys are very weird about being lied to even if it's a tiny white lie. Chances are you two will move on from this. It's never easy but he'll appreciate your truth rather then never know the truth.
2007-02-09 04:04:08 · answer #1 · answered by Pariglow03 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Calm down. Stop with the drama. This is not an emergency. Profuse bleeding is an emergency.
Just explain to him why you didn't tell him the truth in the beginning. Tell him that you are telling the truth now and if he doesn't believe it, there is nothing you can do about it. Plus, these are things in the past, so he really shouldn't be too concerned. I don't know half the stuff my wife did before we met and frankly I don't care.
2007-02-09 04:04:05 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well.... you sorta made your own bed by not being honest from the get-go. It sounds like over time, you've revealed more and more things that you'd denied previously, which gives your guy just cause to wonder what else is down the road.
You can't prove to him that you're done with revelations. All you can do is reassure him and wait for time to prove it for you. But if you lie to him again, you'll destroy any trust that has managed to build back up -- so think very very hard about it before you so much as tell a white lie about whether you like his shirt.
You paved a painful road for yourself. If you're patient, and he's willing to give you the time, you can build back trust slowly.
2007-02-09 04:04:49 · answer #3 · answered by Jarien 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He has the right to be mad. A relationship is built on trust and you have ruined that. It is going to be really hard for him to trust you on things that you are saying because there is always going to be something in the back of his mind wondering if it is the truth or another lie. The way you can start to fix this is by trying to earn his trust again. Show him that you are not lying. There is no quick fix to this situation. It is going to take a lot of time and alot of hard work on your part to prove to him.
2007-02-09 04:05:43 · answer #4 · answered by **baby~doll** 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, what you need to do is tell him that you were scared of scaring him away because he is the best thing that ever happened to you and that you won't do it again.......sadly, the people who lie are the ones that nobody believes, so you can't blame him. It's like if you climbed a tower and ripped open a pillow and let the feathers fly everywhere over the ground.....the feathers are your lies and you couldn't pick them all back up so that it never happened no matter how you tried.
2007-02-09 04:05:12 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok, so he doesn't believe you and you can of course understand why right? Well its time for you to suck it up and take your punishment for being a bad girl, this weekend tell him to tie you to the bed and either tickle or tease you (that's up to you which you decide is less torture) while he interogates you, you don't sound like you are hiding anything that would ruin the relationship but its time to air the dirty laundry and you certainly won't be in a position to lie under his control.
2007-02-09 04:06:12 · answer #6 · answered by tiemetight814 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
never start a relationship off by lying because that is all the relationship will be based off... Just explain to him that you were scared and you did not know what to do and you did not know where the relationship was going... You have to talk to him and explain your self... But take this as a lesson learned you never start off by lying...
2007-02-09 04:03:23 · answer #7 · answered by Shonda 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
reap what you sow and sow what you reap
this is the price of love and it's never cheap
yes i borrowed that last line from bono of U2
sometimes us poets do what we gotta do
so what do you do now that you've come clean
he doesn't believe you, but is he being mean?
i don't have to tell you the lesson to be learned
if you aren't truthful, you'll eventually get burned
2007-02-09 04:12:55 · answer #8 · answered by ? 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to ask him why your past is so important to him - doesn't matter what you did, how you did it or who you did it with - it's over, done with and in the past where it belongs - what matters now is the present and the future
2007-02-09 06:59:24 · answer #9 · answered by kass 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
there is nothing you can do..
at least for your next relationship know that you need to be honest from the begining..
i mean if a guy is going to judge you on your past.. do you really want to be with a guy whos going to judge you..
no probably not :)
good luck with your next relationship
2007-02-09 04:04:08 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋