Please advise me on this?

Question

My boyfriend complains all the time about the littlest dumbest things. I feel like I am a freakin' lesbian, because he really does nag and complain like a straight up girl! I am about to confront him about this foolishness, because we were discussing marriage and I worry because, when the going gets tough, he is supposed to be the head of the household and I feel that he is just going to be a little wuss when it comes to dealing with problems that arise.

I care about him and I want to confront him and tell him about this without being mean, but I HAVE to get my point across so he knows that I am NOT playing. If this complaining keeps up, I will have to leave him and I don't want to do that.

Suggestions, please!!

Answer 1

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Babygirl, yeah, the nagging can build up frustration. I feel you there.
The best thing is NOT to confront him - it will only cause him to be defensive.
If that happens, there is no understanding for negotiations.
Try TALKING to him. I mean TALK to him. How?
Tell him how you feel - that with all the nagging and little trivial things, it makes you question is problem-solving skills. Tell him that you expect him to be less trivial and more into the resolution as this is what you are looking for - a partner, not dead weight.
Tell him you don't think he's being fair to you by venting the pettiness to you, as you have problems of your own.
He'll respect you for that because you're not shouting or finger-pointing, but rather DEFINING what his role should be - in that given area.
Or you could talk to him about things you will work on that will help the relationship and offer this for him to work on - this way it won't be as if you're being condescending.

One love....................