How does the bible say we should discpline our children?

Question

Please include scripture verse and number. Ex. Matthew 1:5

Answer 1

Proverbs 1:8 - A son should hear his father's instruction and not forsake his mother's law.

Romans 1:30,32 - Disobedience to parents, like other sins, causes those who practice it - and those who justify others who practice it - to be worthy of death.

Proverbs 29:15 - A child left to himself (unsupervised) will cause shame. But the rod and reproof will give him wisdom (gained from the parents).

Proverbs 4:10-12 - Because of his parents' instructions, the child is wiser. He can avoid problems and mistakes he might otherwise have.

Answer 2

Discipline—What It Means

For fear of being accused of abuse—physical, verbal, or emotional—some parents shy away from correcting their children. We need not harbor such fears. The word “discipline” as used in the Bible does not imply any kind of abuse or cruelty. The Greek word for “discipline” primarily relates to instruction, education, correction and, at times, firm but loving chastisement.

In providing such discipline, Jehovah God sets a perfect example. Comparing Jehovah to a human father, the apostle Paul wrote: “Don’t all parents correct their children? . . . Our human fathers correct us for a short time, and they do it as they think best. But God corrects us for our own good, because he wants us to be holy.” (Hebrews 12:7-10, Contemporary English Version) Yes, Jehovah disciplines his people to the end that they may be holy, or pure. We can certainly learn much about disciplining children by considering how Jehovah has trained his people.—Deuteronomy 32:4; Matthew 7:11; Ephesians 5:1.

Answer 3

Proverbs 23:13-14

Do not withhold discipline from a child. If you beat him with a rod, he will not die. If you beat him with the rod, you will save his life from Sheol.

Deuteronomy 21:18-21

If a man has a stubborn and rebellious son who will not obey the voice of his father; or the voice of his mother, and, though they chastise him, will not give heed to them, then his father and his mother shall take hold of him and bring him out to the elders of his city at the gate of the place where he lives, and they shall say to the elders of his city, "This our son is stubborn and rebellious, he will not obey our voice; he is a glutton and a drunkard." Then all the men of the city shall stone him to death with stones; so you shall purge the evil from your midst; and all Israel shall hear, and fear.

Many Christians will also quote passages that talk about God being stern but merciful and say that is the path a parent must take. Many fundamentalist sites I have seen seem to feel that children become inherently willful and evil so the only way to raise them to be good and to worship God properly is through the use of some forms of corporeal punishment. I strongly disagree personally. I don't find the Bible to be the best form of guidance in life or child rearing myself.

Answer 4

PROVERBS
22:15 Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child; but the rod of correction shall drive it far from him.
Meaning:Modern theories of child-raising which allow children full freedom of expression when they are not yet wise or experienced enough to make intelligent choices are self-defeating

Proverbs 13:24 He that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes.

Meaning:Contrary to modern humanistic child psychology, the Bible clearly teaches--especially here in the book of Proverbs--that judicious corporal punishment, if administered carefully, lovingly, and appropriately, is necessary in child-raising

Proverbs 29:15 The rod and reproof give wisdom: but a child left to himself bringeth his mother to shame.

Here is an article that I find helpful to go along with your question.

Bible says guide kids, not beat them
In an article on the debate about spanking, which appeared March 8, a school administrator from a private Christian school is quoted as saying, in regard to corporal punishment, "The Bible teaches it." The article does not provide any Scripture that he may have offered to back up this claim, and I am wondering if he is thinking of the oft-quoted "Spare the rod and spoil the child" taken from Proverbs.

In what context is the term "rod" used in this, and other, Proverbial quote(s)? Is it the same "rod" that is found in the Bible's 23rd Psalm: "Thy rod and staff, they comfort me"? How can it be that the same item - a "rod" - is mentioned as both a tool for punishing (striking) a child and then also gently spoken of as a reassuring source of comfort?

To understand this, consider what type of "rod" is being discussed in the first place, which is a shepherd's rod/staff that is used when guiding and caring for sheep. Throughout the Bible, the comparison is made that the relationship between God (and Jesus) and his followers is similar to that of a shepherd caring for his sheep.

Since this text originated during a time, and place, when the people were very familiar with the care of sheep, it is an analogy that provided an understandable frame of reference. A shepherd carried with him a tall wooden rod/staff that was curved at the top.

How was this used in regard to the sheep? When a sheep would leave the flock and stray, did the shepherd use the rod to beat the sheep back into place? Hardly. In fact, the curved end of the shepherd's rod is used to go around the errant sheep and guide it back into place, or even to grasp the sheep and pull it up from where it may have fallen while straying.

A shepherd's rod is used to open gates and brush off, fend off attackers of the sheep, and to guide and steer the sheep along the right path. It is not a tool of pain used to beat the sheep as punishment or something the sheep fear.

If you consider this - the actual use of a shepherd's rod/staff - it is easy to understand that when it comes to children, the Bible teaches guidance and bringing children back to the right path through vigilance and care, in the same manner a shepherd continually guides his sheep along the right path, as opposed to the justification of striking children as form of punishment and to keep their behavior in line.

H. Lyjak

Answer 5

Bring them up with love in the eyes of the Lord with --consistency--. The "don't take candy from strangers" talk needs to be more accurate then it's ever been before considering the destruction of family going on today.

Ephesians 6:4

Answer 6

Read Hebrews 12 ...

Ephesians 6:4 And, fathers, do not provoke your children to anger; but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.

Do not hold back discipline from the child, although you beat him with the rod, he will not die. (Proverbs 23:13)

Answer 7

Children are a gift from God, they belong to God and we are to raise them knowing they will return to Him. I can't think offhand of any scriptures that explain how we should discipline our children. Below are a few to consider when raising children:

"Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, and before you were born I consecrated you" (Jeremiah 1:5 KJV).

"Since we have the same spirit of faith as he had who wrote, "I believed, and so I spoke," we too believe, and so we speak, knowing that He who raised the Lord Jesus will raise us also with
Jesus and bring us with you into His presence." (2 Corinthians 4:13-14 KJV)

"We know that in everything God works for good with those who love Him, who are called according to His purpose. For those whom He foreknew He also predestined to be conformed to the image of His Son, in order that He might be the first-born among many brethren." (Romans 8:28-29 KJV)


I see you received some very good ones from previous answers :) Thanks for asking this question, the responses will make a nice list for study.

Answer 8

"Spare the rod and spoil the child." This quote is directly from the King James Version of the Bible. Despite political correctness, our laws contradict biblical teaching.

We need to bring back discipline for our kids to avert disaster.

Answer 9

Proverbs 13:24 "He that spareth his rod hateth his son: But he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes" Proverbs 23:13 "Withhold not correction from the child: for if thou beatest him with the rod, he shall not die." Proverbs 23:14 "Thou shalt beat him with the rod, and shalt deliver his soul from hell." Proverbs 29:15 "The rod and reproof give wisdom: but a child left to himself bringeth his mother to shame." Proverbs 29:17 "Correct thy son, and he shall give thee rest; yea, he shall give dellight unto thy soul." Okay, Proverbs is filled with verses about correction and the correcting of a child. Hebrews 12:5-11 This is a longer passage and starts by talking about chastening from the Lord BUT it is compared to that of a Dad to his children. Hope this is helpful for you!

Answer 10

Children, be obedient to your parents in all things, for this is well-pleasing to the Lord.

Fathers, do not exasperate your children, so that they will not lose heart Col 3:20-21

Matthew 18:10
See that you do not despise one of these little ones, for I say to you that their angels in heaven continually see the face of My Father who is in heaven