My fiance and I are looking at where to get married. She is American, and I am English, and we will be getting married in England. In this country when the question is asked "do you take.." the response is meant to be "I will", but we would like the "I do". We also quite like the idea of saying some of our own vows. Is this something that can be done in England, or are the vicars very strict?
2007-02-08 23:35:10 · 4 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
I do attend church, but rather infrequently due to being on call, and frankly, a little laziness. The church that has real meaning to me i'm not allowed to be married in, due mainly to the vicar in charge, and the other one, is out of the parish that i live in.
Of the vicars and people we have spoken to, all have said there is little chance to personalise the event, i just wondered if this was a church standard, or down to individuals?
2007-02-11 20:33:10 · update #1
I cannot fathom there being a problem with this! You must keep in mind that it is YOUR wedding and if you and your soon to be wife want to tweak your wedding ceremony to fit what you two want, then there is nothing wrong with that nor should you feel like you can't!
I suggest meeting with the person who will be marrying you both and just explain what little changes you would like to make. I honestly don't see this being a problem whatsoever.
There is no law saying you cannot say "I do" versus "I will." Make your wedding YOUR day, not anyone else's! I think it's wonderful when two people say their own vows, it's more personal and sincere. Seriously though, just meet with the pastor/vicar ahead of time and express your desires. If they cannot respect your simple wishes, then I definitely suggest finding a new one who understands that this is your day and not theirs.
Congratulations and I wish you all the best in your marriage and life together!
2007-02-09 00:06:19 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are not a Church attender why do you want a religious wedding? If you are, how come you have not asked your vicar/minister?
The traditional response is "I do", by the way.
When I conduct weddings I give a great deal of choice to the couple.
2007-02-09 15:35:27 · answer #2 · answered by alan h 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Friend, It depends on the law of your country. Many countries have different laws, Here in the USA we either get a minister or a Justice of the Peace, or anyone by USA laws & by my State law that will accept certain ceramonies as official. I lost my 1st wife in death, & I remarried again, in a church by our pastor, My wife said I will, & I said I do, Both was accepted, because first of all our vows is to God & not man, man only wittness our vows to God. If you want to say some of your vows also, wait until the people that legally marrys you two, get done I would tell whoever marries you that after the original vows, that you have some words to also say after your legal vow laws is complete.
2007-02-09 07:51:02 · answer #3 · answered by birdsflies 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I'm from NZ, so I'm guessing, but I can't see why it would be a problem, but you should speak to the minister at the church where you want to get married. You will have to do this anyway, so why not assume you can do it?
Think of it this way: There are things you have to do (e.g. "you've got to invite so and so"), and there are things you must not do (e.g. "You have to talk to her when you talk to her husband") and after that you can do what you like.
2007-02-09 08:10:48 · answer #4 · answered by Bad bus driving wolf 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋