is this normal for all men or what.everytime me and my bf have some bustup or anything where he knows and i know i am always right[ no really i am] we will have this argument or debate or watever at night and i will in anger declare the relationship over and then in the morning he will `FORGET` we ever argued and talk to me like everythings normal.....and then he will be amused and surprised when i tell him what happened the night before....why do men do this...pretend nothin ever happened........
2007-02-08 23:15:22 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
He is laughing at the fact that you are stuck in a holding pattern in your life.
Your value center revolves around, "Whose right and whose wrong!" You have probably honed your rhetorical and argumentative skills over decades to perfection to ensure that you "win" an argument. And when you can't get your partner to VALIDATE your point/stance/observation ==> you become enraged and quit by terminating the relationship.
But winners never quit and quitters never win!
Here is the kicker question back to you!
What good is it to be right, if you have to ALONE to celebrate the victory?
Repeat that question 3 times and get a piece of paper and come up with 3 responses that cogently answers that question.
In the grand scheme of things, it doesn't matter whose right & whose wrong.
What matters is that you recognize the game for what it is and you don't become a slave to foolish paradigms or your emotions.
You are BIGGER than your emotions. You are BIGGER than your FEARS. You are BIGGER than your PAIN. You are BIGGER than the REJECTION you feel when your boyfriend acts like you are crazy.
But don't get it twisted, on a certain level, you are crazy.
And you might want to go on Oprah since you are always right because I think we have another Jesus Christ on Earth. Harpo Productions is looking for the next Jesus Christ and you have a good chance of making the show.
2007-02-08 23:48:35 · answer #1 · answered by DaMan 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He may be wondering why you dwell on things. Men and women see things differently. Do you think he understands how you can probably spend the entire day shopping and not buy anything? Men ten to see the world in absolute values while women tend to delve into Freudian analysis. When you ask him how you look and he says, "you look nice," and that's exactly what he meant. Nothing more, nothing less. Women are more likely to wonder what he "really" meant by that.
When you have an arugument, he remembers all the past arguments and how nothing became of them and, in that case, the present argument would not seem special. You on the other hand probably see each argument as particularly meaningful and wonder why he doesn't react.
On the other hand, if you both know you're always right, why do you bother to argue about it. And if you argue so much, why on earth are you still together?
2007-02-08 23:55:50 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The better question is why do you break-up with him every time you cant convince him in a argument? You're the one that sound childish to me. To answer your question he probably don't think it's that big of a deal (the fight) so he moves on. besides you said he always does this means you take him back ever time. So whats that say about you?
2007-02-08 23:24:57 · answer #3 · answered by firshizel 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
because as men we feel obligated to be the protector of the relationship( kind of like a parent) and when there are fights ( even though there is only a 0.0032% chance of us being right) we still try to "win" but inevitably we don't. then we get angry for giving you another reason to gloat. but if we try to pretend nothing ever happend maybe we can erase the score. hope this makes sense to you bc i am confusing myself.
2007-02-08 23:21:11 · answer #4 · answered by flamemaster_lang 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Many men don't hold on to ugly conflict within the home. That's not being dense, it's called being smart. You might try it some time.
If you want to keep a fight going all the time, go marry Ike Turner.
2007-02-08 23:19:34 · answer #5 · answered by Typical McCain Supporter 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
the problem is u think u always right so the guy just doesnt want to argue over it coz u always look for innoncense instead of solution,so what goes on in his mind is this:WHY ARGUE WITH A NUT HEAD JUST LET HER BE,,
2007-02-08 23:25:22 · answer #6 · answered by broderm2k 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like this guy is just in love with you and doesn't want to fight about "it" anymore.
Leave it at that. No one's going to win if you keep the "i'm right, you're wrong" argument going.
Tell him you're sorry and see if he tells you that too. If he doesn't, ask him if he's sorry too. Things should go better from there.
2007-02-08 23:19:22 · answer #7 · answered by babbles 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i don't think he's dense. i think he understands you a lot - how you like to be right and how you'd 'break up' when you're mad. if you were really serious about breaking up, then you would have been firm about it, instead of having this argue-get mad-break up cycle many times. and like most cycles, you need to take a step back and break it (the cycle) if you want a change.
2007-02-08 23:37:52 · answer #8 · answered by Jade Ice 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the reason why you argue in the first place is because neither of you wants to be wrong or wants to give up
and he probably acts as if nothing ever happened, because he doesn't want to jeapordise the relationship...ask him to be more open, maybe there's something going on in his head that he doesn't want to tell anybody
2007-02-08 23:20:05 · answer #9 · answered by zorro 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it sounds like he is joking
my love and i say the stupidest things to each other and to other ppl sometimes it sounds like we really mean it
but it is just us we are so easy going and so in love that it is like our lil inside joke
it may be his way of just joking
i would sit down and talk to him try to be serious on his part
tell him that you are kind of confused and see what he says
2007-02-08 23:20:19 · answer #10 · answered by elite_women_rule_the_rock 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋