After taking advice from yall, I found a sex-buddy (my b/f cuzn) & I now have emotional ties.. what do I do???

Question

About a month ago I had asked you for some advice regarding the fact that my boyfriend was greedy when it came to sex. Most of the advice suggested I either leave him or simply find a "sex-buddy". After careful consideration I decided to ask my best friend (my b/f's cuzn) to do it just as a friendly favor and just one time. Now we are together constantly, as friends we always were but now were sneeking out of the house to be alone away from my b/f. We know its wrong and we realize what its going to do to the family if anyone ever finds out, the problem is... For at least 6 mons now I'd been fighting back the feelings I've had for the cuzn and staying with my b/f, and the cuzn has treated me so much better than my own b/f does, even in the past I would tease my b/f that his cousin was a better b/f to me than he was.. my problem is... I want the cousin as my b/f and not my own b/f, the cuzn & I have feelings for each other, so do I stay with my b/f or go for my best friend, his cuzn?

Answer 1

It's obvious that your boyfriend's no good. It's also obvious that this cousin you speak of is just what you need.
Of course you should dump your boyfriend and go with him. So what if others don't like it. What is more important, your happiness or theirs?
Even if things don't work out in the end, at least you've had a lot of fun. And you are not trapped in a relationship with a man who doesn't love you at all.
Someday women will find out that GOOD men are out there who will treat women like queens. My wife knows this VERY well. If you want to be happy, why are you staying with a man who thinks you are a convenient sex object?

Answer 2

If a month ago you were told either leave your bf or get a sex buddy and you've had feelings for the cousin for 6 months, it sounds ilke maybe you made the wrong choice and you should have left your bf in the first place.

Honestly, leaving someone for a relative is never easy, and will never go over well with the family if you expect a long term relationship. The only way to do this "properly" is to leave your bf not for someone else but because you don't like being with him. Stay single for a month or two after that before deciding whether or not to get with the cousin. Rebound relationships are trouble enough already, give yourself some alone time before you move on.

Answer 3

I'm thinking no good can come of this.

You should definitely not stay with the boyfriend. Obviously he was not doing something right in the first place, or you wouldn't have asked his cousin to be your sex buddy.

ummm... And, what on earth where you thinking asking his Cousin for pete's sake??! lol Millions of people in the world. I'm pretty sure one of them would have helped you out.

Anyway... You can stay with the cousin, owning up to things with your boyfriend. But, be prepared for a lot of family flak. Because there will be some. ok, a LOT. If you really like the cousin that much, you have to ask yourself if it's worth it. If it is, go ahead.

Just be warned, it won't be pretty
Livia-

Answer 4

I can only tell you the outcome:

You won't be able to take the cuz seriously in the long run, since he's an accomplice to your cheating.

Your boyfriend should and will leave you because what you're doing and have done is utterly disrespectful and unfair.

The longer you stay a double-timing cheat will determine the level of self-respect you ultimately lose, as well as how cynical you will feel about others being faithful toward YOU in your future relationships.

Answer 5

I think that the best thing to do in this situation is break up with your boyfriend. I COMPLETELY disagree with the idea that by getting a sex buddy you're solving your relationship problems- introducing another person into your relationship was bound to come back and bite you. You need to simplify the problem- dump the boyfriend. It's not fair of you to string him along like this if you really don't have feelings for him. Let him move on, and in future, don't try and solve problems by having sex with your boyfriend's cousin. It solves nothing, and only makes the situation worse.

Answer 6

I agree with A dad & A teacher on this one.

The only other thing I can say is be prepared cause if they are a close family, they are going to hate you and consider you the family whore. I'm sorry for being so blunt but something are just best not to keep in the family but at times, if your meant to be together then sooner or later the family will have to learn to accept it, rather they like you or not.

Answer 7

Many (consistent with probability maximum?) adult adult males think of of intercourse as being in a actual type, yet there are additionally many different adult adult males for whom intercourse fits merely as lots in an emotional type... that is totally complicated to fully separate the two, yet without emotion the intercourse is incomprehensible previous any very short actual excitement - or maybe the fast actual excitement is "lacking something" if there is not any longer an emotional bond between the guy and lady. So, in my opinion, intercourse fits far extra in an emotional type than purely a actual one.

Answer 8

girl you might as well call this a lost one since no one is really going to take you serious.if you was to be with your best friend as a boyfriend he is not going to trust you cuz you are sneeking around right now when you should have just been honest from the start.in other words your just the blunt...getting passed around

Answer 9

Leave your bf and go out with his cuzn. and tell him why you did this was b/c he was a selfish lover.Case closed. Good Luck

Answer 10

Sounds like you're more into his cuz than him.
Maybe its time for a reality check and choose one over the other - short term pain, long term gain.