I live with my fiance and his 13yrold boy, who told me to shut up and he called me all the worst cuss names, for two days, now. The boy's dad went to sleep before he did, tonight. When he was going to bed the boy insisted on taking the dog out of his cage so the dog could sleep with him. As punishment for disrespecting me, I said no. The dog is not sleeping with you tonight. The dog cage has a lock on it because the boy will run with the dog all over the house if we don't keep it locked. (The boy can't resist letting the dog out to run wild.) So, again, the boy cussed at me over and over. Then, he took the cage apart because I would not unlock it. The dog got out and the boy took the dog to his room. I went to get the dog. I called him out and he came. So the boy cussed at me, again, and started screaming. His dad woke up and came up stairs and yelled, violently, close in my face, because I fed the dog a doggie cookie.
Is the dad allowing his kid to learn disrespect for women?
2007-02-08 18:54:18 · 22 answers · asked by mswonderrfull 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
And why are you still there????
2007-02-08 19:03:53 · answer #1 · answered by ABBYsMom 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I would have to honestly say yes; that this man is not making matters any better. You are an adult, and this is a child. If the dad was going to yell at anyone it should have been the child. He should have set an example, as to what is expected within the household.
It appears to me that you need to get the men in check within your household. I would let this man know that he is not to scold me in front of an child when this child is already in a stage of disrespecting you.
I do not know the status of your household. Like are you also a bread winner for the home, or are you a housewife. If you are a bread winner within the home then I would let this man how how I am feeling, and threaten to move out of the home if he cannot control his temper, and his son.
If you are a housewife you still have rights you just have to choose your words better to confront this issue. I would hate to give you the wrong advice since I currently do not know your status within the household.
I am married and we both work. I work three jobs, and I make the most money. I also make all the rules within the household for my three son's and my husband.
I do not play disrespectful men or children for that matter, and i would have to tell you to start speaking up for yourself, and get your castle in order.
2007-02-09 03:03:03 · answer #2 · answered by Meko 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
ha what on earth is going on there... his dad yelled at you???? I think his dad is only using you and you should start making plans to move out and find a better man.. what on earth is his problem over you giving that dog a doggie cookie.. As for as the dog, when that kid goes to school and his father goes to play like he is a man... get rid of that mutt. ( the dog) and tell no one. You be sure you also do your thing and let everyone think that you do not know what happened to the dog....sure...everyone will suspect you... but that kid will wise up... OR HIS NEXT.... ha ha ha ha, just kidding about the kid... that child has a problem and he is learning it from his father.. and his father has no respect for you... you bet his father is the main teacher of that child... you are the next teacher... and you both need to teach the same thing or else the child will pick up the strongest personaility in the house and that is the fathers personality.. if you were in a different situation i would suggest to try and make it work, but the father who is your boyfriend does not respect you.. you are the one to loose in this if you continue to stay... you will loose self respect for you.... and for other men... not all men who have children are like the man you live with.. most divorced or separated men have children that are well behaved....keep looking he is out there the man for you...he might have children but the man for you will respect you and love you.. what a nasty, filthy man you have to scream in your face in the night.. he is a very bitter man....
2007-02-09 03:10:27 · answer #3 · answered by bankone1111 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
first off you have to understand where the boy is coming from. you are a new face and he sees u as some one that is trying to replace his mother.
it seems to me u are in a power struggle with this boy. u won't win this fight. the dad will always side with his son sorry to say but it's the truth.
take the dog tonight the boy was proving a point when he let the dog he was saying u ARE NOT HIS MOTHER with out saying it
u need to find a common ground with him show him that u are not the enemy he thinks u are u have to ask your self now is this worth all this if it is then make amends to show him
the father is not teaching him to be dis respectfully towards women . but he is teaching him that with enough he can force u out of the picture and it will just be him and his dad again
2007-02-09 03:10:28 · answer #4 · answered by ryan s 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You allow your fiance to disrespect you so the son is learning it from him. You could record the boy cussing and play it back to the dad but I think that you should get out of the relationship. Its simple things that give us warning signs when a relationship gets bad so heed to it. Love yourself enough to demand respect and if not just walk out.
2007-02-09 02:59:33 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Ha Ha maybe you should learn your lesson and let the men run the house. Who cares if the dog is out? HMMM maybe you just have control issue and want to have total control over the 13yr old boy because his dad beats you. Maybe if you would stop being a whinner then the boy will listen to you, instead he walks all over you. Or next time put the boy in the cage and the dog in his room, then maybe he will listen to you. Good luck
2007-02-09 03:03:19 · answer #6 · answered by dhk20a3 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
I really think that there is more to this than you are saying as your description of your fiances son as 'the boy' seems almost as you are putting him in the same category as 'the dog'. Maybe you should sit down with your fiance and his son and try to sort things out. This young man may need the attention of his friend 'the dog' as he may not be getting what he needs from the adults in the house.
2007-02-09 03:01:16 · answer #7 · answered by auburn 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
He doesn't seem to care too much about you so you really have to do something. Don't let them treat you like that, especially if u didn't do anything bad. You'd better have a talk with your fiancee about his child's education and do not be afraid to punish the little one cause if you do he will consider you're unable to do it and will disrespect you more.
2007-02-09 03:18:27 · answer #8 · answered by teen 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You are actually taking this abuse?? What is wrong with you that you think you deserve such treatment? Do you have self esteem issues? You need some self respect. That father of his needs to step up to the plate and tell that boy to respect you. You need to demand that. If he doesn't then I ASSURE you it will get worse. Your fiance has no respect for you. Marry him and you will end up like Scott Peterson's wife. Dead on the bottom of a lake.
2007-02-09 03:06:09 · answer #9 · answered by Carrie 1 · 1⤊ 2⤋
the BF should yell at his kid and then never let him have the dog in the room becasue he took the cage apart and cussed at you.
2007-02-09 04:46:27 · answer #10 · answered by MsRedd 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Put the kid in his place! Act like you have some power over him. Tell him to hush up and tell your fiance about these problems.
2007-02-09 02:59:19 · answer #11 · answered by Desert Rose 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋