My friend is visiting me from out of town. She has a boyfriend she's been seeing for about 5 years - She's helped him out in studies so when they marry, he could become a better provider. She has worked her butt off at 2 jobs to put him through school. He also worked part-time 2 or 3 days a week 2 hours a day. He recently graduated with a degree and is making over $32.00 an hour. His attitude has changed and he seems to have very little time for my friend. Yes, he does go out, with his 'new' friends from higher places. He never invites her and when she asks to come along he makes some idiotic excuse for her not to go. He's making her feel like she's beneath him. I've told her to just move forward not saying anything to him and see where it goes from there. what do you suggest?
2007-02-08 18:22:08 · 6 answers · asked by gigi 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
He got what he needed from her and now he will leave her...This happens more often then you think...
2007-02-08 19:24:58 · answer #1 · answered by ABBYsMom 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes this sort of guys needs to get a smack in the head and let him know that without her, he is a nobody. And yes, some people might change their attitude cos they think they are smarter then their partner and forgot that someone has actually work their butt off to provide so he cld get good education. Meaning to say, ur friend shld voice up if she is unhappy, cos she is the one that make him what he is today.
2007-02-08 18:30:34 · answer #2 · answered by DooGie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Having been in this position in my past... I would suggest she tell him how she feels. Not anything confrontational. Just factual. 'I feel sad that you do not include me with your friends'. Something along those lines. Opening the way for that she wishes to now take her turn in going to school or in getting some training while he helps to pay her way as she did for him.
My experience is that one of two things will happen. One: He agrees with her and steps up to help her get where she wants to go and including her in more of 'his' things. Or, two: he basically says 'No way am I putting my money into you and you embarrass me when you are around my friends'.
Hope for the first one, but always expect the latter one. I have found that when you put someone ahead of yourself with the hope that one day they will in return take care of your needs, they often 'forget' what you did for them to get them where they are at currently.
I hope your friend gets what she needs.
Livia-
2007-02-08 19:11:46 · answer #3 · answered by livia_orknot 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's an age old story. I think education cures many problems because you can live a better, easier life. He has moved on and there isn't anything she can do about it. I would suggest that she tell him it is her turn to go to school. If worse comes to worse, she can at least provide nicely for herself. . .and move on if necessary. I'll bet he says no or worse. . .
It's pretty obvious what will happen. Does she want to wait for it to happen and waste more time?
2007-02-08 18:30:59 · answer #4 · answered by towanda 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you are right, she should see what happens. But tell her to always keep her head up. Here is a quote someone told me long ago. We are all just humans, so you can never be better than me. You might be in a better spot then me, but you can never be better than another human.
2007-02-08 18:33:31 · answer #5 · answered by cb5504 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
oh my gosh...reading that made me sooo mad! he is SUCH an *** =(!! after everything she did, he treated her like dat?? u shud defnitely tell ur friend to move on....
as the saying goes
"u only realise what u hav, when its gone".
if he's a gud enuff guy, he'l realise he's lost sumthing special n work towards getting her back n treating her ryt.
if he just lets her go...then he's as big of jerk as i think he is.
hope everything works out 4 ur friend hun, sh's lucky 2 hav sum1 as concerned 4 her as u r =) gud luck!
2007-02-08 18:31:08 · answer #6 · answered by noodles 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋