Well...there is this guy I have known for almost 2 years now. WE have become pretty good friends, we do a lot together and have a lot of mutual friends. For the msot part he is a nice guy, but he keeps on doing this thing where he will start acting like he is attracted to me and start alluding to us getting together, but then it seems like all of a sudden he will pull away...I don't get it. At first I thought maybe it was only in my head, but other friends started asking about the way he was treating me, saying he acted like he wanted to be more than friends, but then pulls away!!
He acts jealous about other guys that I might mention, but even though it has been made clear that I am attracted to him in the past, he won't do anything about it! Sometimes I feel like he doesn't want to be with me, but that he doesn't want me to be with anyone else either.. He will make comments about other guys, saying they are nice guys for me, but if I show that I might be interested, he gets defensive
2007-02-08 18:01:12 · 7 answers · asked by confused 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
A prime example is he invited me out w/ some friends to go dancing... we end up being there with 3 other couples. But he then makes a comment about us being the only single people there and there not being enough girls for him to dance w/....after he told me not to invite other girls when he invited me?!?!? Does that make any sense?? Then he only dances with me twice, when usually he would be out there dancing all night pretty much...the rest of the time we just sat there, while all of our other friends who were either dating or married were dancing.
2007-02-08 18:20:12 · update #1
He is likely interested, but many men, myself included, have become insecure and lack the confidence to say what they feel because experience has taught them that they cant have what they want. I think it may be helpful just to corner him and make the first move. Kiss him if you have to. Guys like this can be the most romantic men youll ever meet.
2007-02-08 18:10:50 · answer #1 · answered by bolinger81380 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you need to quit trying to turn this into a romantic relationship. It sounds as if you're being used as a safety net. He knows he HAS you. There's no chase for him and it's too easy. He's bored and only fluffing his ego with you. Making sure you're still there to be his "mirror, mirror, on the wall." Also, since you have been friends for a while there's probably not much mystery left there. Either that or he is afraid of losing your friendship if things don't work out. Especially since you two have a lot of "mutual" friends. Be careful you may be setting yourself up for a really big heartbreak.
2007-02-08 18:18:35 · answer #2 · answered by Eulalia 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you told him you would like to have a relationship with him? If you haven't, and you do, then tell him! Maybe the reason why he hasn't said anything is because he doesn't think you're interested.
If you do tell him you're interested, and he does the same thing....well, he's got issues. Then I would say he has issues with commitment and he isn't ready for a relationship.
If you tell him you're interested, and he still pulls away, I would confront him and ask him why he doesn't want a relationship with you and yet he gets mad when someone else does! Tell him that if he doesn't want to be with you, you can't wait around until he makes up his mind! I bet he'll tell you how he feels then!
2007-02-08 18:09:28 · answer #3 · answered by september c 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds to me like he's pretty insecure. It's pretty possible that he's secretly digging you, but is just too afraid to get serious. That's tough cuz he probably doesn't want to ruin the great friendship you have already. Try talking to him about it. Ask him what he really wants from the relationship. If he likes you, then tell him to stop acting weird and go out with you! But, if he's just not ready to be more than good friends, you've gotta respect that and continue being his good bud. Good luck with him hon.
2007-02-08 18:08:02 · answer #4 · answered by iluvatm 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He indeed likes you more than a friend, but may be afraid to ruin a good friendship. If the relationship doesn't work out later, you might not be in life anymore and that's a big risk for him.
2007-02-08 18:06:18 · answer #5 · answered by artutina 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
u need to make it clear to him that you are not interested in playing his stupid games. make it clear to him that you dont like it and he has to make a choice whether he wants you or not and if he does he has to do something about it.
you shouldnt wait around for him to decide and go back and forth.
2007-02-08 18:10:18 · answer #6 · answered by B* 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he sounds like he is in love with you...and the reason why he is pulling away maybe because he doesnt know that you like him...thats if you do..and he doesnt want to push something that you aren't ready for
2007-02-08 18:05:57 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋