Wedding Cake?

Question

I am currently dealing with the coordinator at the resort where my reception is to be held. I want to have my wedding cake after the dinner, but not right after. The D.J painted us a picture of having dinner, get things going, then stop once about an hour into it, get the cake done and the bouquet, garter toss if it was being done and then go back to dancing and it's all fine and good. This lady reccomending me to have it around 11pm. I really don't want to do this. My great grandmother is going to be there, and she's in her late 90's, I want her to see that, and I don't want people to be sloshed when it comes around to that. Is that so bad? Is it odd that I want it at that time?

Answer 1

That's odd. Any wedding I've ever been to in my life has always done the cake cutting after dinner so that way the elderly or the people with children that wanted to leave could do so before the atmosphere got out of control. (Well, I mean with the music, dancing, and what not.) At my banquet hall they suggest doing the cake 1/2hr to an hour after dinner. It's your day and you're paying these people....tell them what you want. You set your own time table. If they don't agree with it, ask for a price reduction. No one is going to make you spend that much money and then tell you how things are going to be done. Who eats cake at 11:00 anyway?? I'm sure at that point no one will want any considering they'll probably have a few drinks in their system. :-)

Answer 2

I am very familiar with weddings (coordianted for years) and the FLOW is the most important thing. Most people wil be done eating and waiting for the cake, those who want/need to leave early (grannie) will be waiting for the cake, so if you dance first you can be huaranteed to dissapoint and lose alot of people who would otherwise like to see it and have the cake but donot want to wait until 11. Also, if you stop to do the cake at 11 that will signal the end to the party and you will lose alot of people who would otherwise have stayed later. Listen to the coordinator, that is what they get paid for, it is in your best interests. Also seriously reconsider getting "sloshed" at all. The WORST weddings are those where the bride and/or groom gets too drunk to look good in photos, rememebr the event, have "special" time after the event, stay respectible. There are soooooo may other nights to get sloched, let this be the one night where you dont, you will grateful later.

Answer 3

It's your wedding, and even though the coordinator is trying to be helpful, you should have it when you want it. Your great grandmother and guests shouldn't have to wait until 11:00. I think the DJ has a good idea. Have dinner, then toasts, and the bridal party dancing (bride with father, groom with mother, etc) and then do the cake, bouquet, garter. People who have to leave for whatever reason can leave, and the rest can party-on!

Answer 4

The DJ is right. You expressed you want your grandmother to see it and it IS your decision after all. Hopefully you can have the DJ convey that there will be more dancing/celebration after the cake though. Most wedding guests take the cutting of the cake as a cue that the wedding will be over soon and ready themselves to leave. It would be a shame to have your guests walk out when there are still a few hours left.

Answer 5

It is your wedding and you should do it exactly how you want to. I think the DJ had a good idea. I have been to wedding receptions that did exactly that. That way no one misses out on the cake. You and the groom still look pretty good. People are not sloshed out of their minds and the elderly and the young ones will both be able to enjoy it as well as the people who will not stick around till 11 p.m so I think it works out great the way the dj suggested

Answer 6

What i am going to do is have it after the dinner just because i want to consider all the people that can't handle the whole night. But I do think your dj gave you a great idea. My brothers had done it that way. If you have a grandmother or grandfather that might have to leave early and you want her or him to share this time with you then I would really have it after the dinner. This is your wedding and you have to do it your way no other way but yours so talk to this lady and set it straight. Good Luck

Answer 7

Don't listen to the B**ch coordinator, it's your wedding. Most want dessert right after dinner, not hours latter. I used to work at lots of weddings. Get everything , meaning the cake, bouquet toss, etc, done right after dinner to accommodate the older guests.
Don't let the coordinator walk all over you, she is an employee.

Answer 8

Have the cake like the DJ said- he's been standing there working, watching people at weddings ALOT so he knows. Older folks leave after the festivities, while the younger ones dance the night away.

Answer 9

I agree with the DJ. In traditional weddings the bride greets everyone, dances with everyone, opens the gifts and then cuts the cake. But there's no reason why you can't cut the cake first, take off the top and save it, and give your grandma a piece or two to take home, and then go back to the dancing.

Answer 10

Just remember you are paying the coordinator so she is working for you not the other way around and WHAT YOU WANT IS WHAT YOU SHOULD GET. This is where some of these wedding planners and coordinators try to take control of something that they are not entitled to. This is your wedding and they are there to help you plan WHAT YOU WANT.