Was calling the police on my suicidal friend a good idea? What should I do now?

Question

I really want to know because it feels indifferent. Not a good deed or a bad one, and that scares me the most. He's been cutting since 7th grade and he's in 10th now and he has been depressed before. I called my mom after I read his MySpace message to me about it. The thing I think is most upsetting is that he told the officer that came to his house it was a sarcastic message. What can I do now? I don't want to hate him or even be angry at him for saying that. I won't be able to monitor his behavior since we go to different schools this year.

Answer 1

Calling the police was the best thing that you could do for your friend. You may have saved his life. He may not think so highly of you now, but give him time and space to cool down. Don't be so hard on yourself. If you didn't call, and he followed through, you'd feel horrible. You're a good friend.

Can you speak to your guidance counselor? Perhaps the guidance counselor can contact your friend's school. The counselors at your friend's school can "check in" with him periodically to be sure that he's okay. They could probably check his wrists (or wherever else he's cutting). If they see the scars, they can get him the help he needs.

Answer 2

I think you did the only thing you could have done with the information that he gave you. Don't hate him for saying it was a sarcastic message because he's got some problems. You did what anyone who cares would do. Give him time maybe he'll realize that you are a true friend, and if he doesn't then just be secure in the fact that you may have saved his life.

Answer 3

An important thing to keep in mind is that you're not in charge of monitoring him. It's not your job. Be his friend and be supportive, but draw a line somewhere because when he's alone, and you're not there, there's nothing you can do. An important thing to do while you still can isemotionally distance yourself a bit from him. Not a lot, but enough to where you don't blame yourself. It will make things much easier to handle and more importantly, it will make your judgement much clearer. You're still young, and so is he.

Another thing to keep in mind is that cutting DOES NOT make a person suicidal. I've been a cutter for 8 years, and I've also ben in charge of Self-injury support groups. 90 something percent of people who cut don't do it with suicidal intent. It's a coping mechanism for something in his life. Wether it is depression, mental illness, social problems, or family issues, he cuts to cope. One thing you can really do to help yourself and him is to learn as much as you can about cutting from cutters. Textbooks and doctors can only know so much, and I've never met a doctor who knew as much as I knew about cutting. It's a personal venture that can't be described or explained better than by someone who suffers from it.

So basically, here's my recommendation:
Distance yourself A BIT from him, and don't take things personal. Learn about cutting and learn about depression, knowledge is a great weapon to keep in your arsenal.

Calling the cops might have actually caused more trouble then it helped, but probably not anything significant. The cops really can't do much even if he admitted to him that he was a cutter. You can tell his parents, but that will cause more strain, and he probably doesn't need that.

Try to get him into a hobby. Guitar saved my life. Lifting weights, or anything physically draining will help.

If you want some more help or anyone to talk to about it, feel free to email me at [e-mail]

Answer 4

I have to say that it was a wise decision. BUt you are only thinking about the negatives. Try and think on the bright side, like hes alive right? and he might actually change his way and become religious if he was not already. You know life is a very precious gift from God right? So taking a life is a BIG no-no. Did you know that when you kill yourself you are still taking a life, but now you can't ask for forgiveness from God since you're already dead, so you just go to hell. would you rather him be tortured for all of eternity, or depressed for a while.that's up to you.

Answer 5

He is probably in denial about his problem. You did the right thing, his parents can monitor his behavior now, since your phone call to her got the wheels turning in her head about the possibility her son needs help. They might find some counseling for him and he can start recovering. For now, just be his friend, and if he says he doesnt want to talk to you, then let him cool off for a while and then he may want to thank you for helping him and be friends again

Answer 6

you would be greater effective off calling a suicide hotline or an suggestion provider of this nature and chatting with them - the police are an emergency provider and till your chum is status on the edge of a tall development and perilous to leap off, they are not certainly a topic of the police and you will desire to get into hardship for dropping police time. they might desire to get the main suitable type of help, no longer the aggressive, enforced type - consult from them and tell them which you're hectic and pondering intervening on their behalf via fact you're heavily in contact approximately them and you think of they might desire to communicate to their wellbeing care expert and doubtless evaluate some counselling.

Answer 7

well i dunno, calling cops on someone in a crisis situation can be dangerous, for the young person. it can be distressing and therefore triggering for a person to have such authority turn up at their house. i understand your concern and i admire your courage! but it is his life, all you can really do is be there for him, be a friend, that is what he needs and will appreciate the most.
if he isn't already seeing a therapist, talk to him, he can go see a doctor and get reffered, he doesn't need to involve his parents just yet, unless they already know.
perhaps talk to his parents, make sure he is never left at home alone.
this is just a little advice from someone who can understand how HE is feeling, i have attempted suicide a few times, i SI, have an eating disorder and have been hospitalised. i also have a qualification in youth work and i am only 17, so dont think that i dont understand, because i do! i am here if you need to talk, or if u want, id love to talk to him! i am here to help you, i am non-judgemental and i can see that this is tough on you, dont bottle it up, you need to talk about it too! please email me if you want!
[e-mail]
thanks, take care! oxoxox

Answer 8

Your friend should be helped by the adults who care for him. You are too young to be involved in this type of relationship and I am surprised that your parent(s) haven't put a stop to it.

People who have major psychological problems like this need help from qualified professionals like a psychologist or psychiatrist. Even adults who are friends with suicidal people need to be aware of what they are doing.

You need to stop playing therapist and get on with your own life. If you want drama in your life try out for the school play. If you keep getting into relationships like this you may need help yourself.

It is highly likely that you were brought up by someone who has alcohol or drug problems. Take yourself to Ala-teen and learn how to have the fun of a teenager.

Answer 9

If your friend was for sure planning a suicide, and it was prevented by your calling 911...chances are you've lost this friend, but saved the life of a person as well. Unselfish giving differs from merely being concerned about your own feelings; 'I would be so sad' 'what a bummer!' 'how could I live with myself', etc...
-at any rate-he's no longer 'your' problem. Be Glad.

Answer 10

You are not his keeper. You did the right thing by calling for help. What he told them is his business and you can not change that. You did the right thing!!! It is too bug for one person to handle so tell anyone who will listen. Even if he gets mad at you, at least he will be alive and mad. Eventually he will come around and thank you, and if not then he is not someone who you need to be around.