Should I be bridesmaid at my best friends wedding?

Question

Im a 21 year old guy and my best friend has asked me to be bridesmaid at her wedding. I was really pleased to be asked as it shows how much I mean to her, but I don't know if I should do it as it's not what a guy usually does. I know she wants me to be there with her through all the pre wedding events and share her day with her. I also know she wants all the bridesmaids to look the same. I'm thinking I shouldn't be selfish and should do it for her as it's her big day but what do you think? Could people also tell me more about what I would be letting myself in for, like what being a bridesmaid is all about. And in answer to the obvious questions, I'm not gay and I'm not a crossdresser.

Answer 1

I asked my male buddies to be ushers. After all, bridesmaids traditionally wear the frilly matching dresses. What are you going to do? Wear a suit in the appropriate color? Ask her what it'd involve.

Answer 2

I have seen a guy being the bridesmaid a few times now. It doesnt look strange, but instead of calling you the bridesmaid she should pick a different name like brides best man sounds much better, go somthing along that line. If she means a lot to you than go for it, you will be a great help and she really feels like she wants you a part of this.
You dont have to do much, let the bridemaids do the girly things, and you hang out with the guys. This would just look better, and you wouldnt feel like the odd man out. And instead of having a wedding shower just for the girls, have it unisex, and have both guys and girls coming, and the bride and groom both come. This way you can be apart of the planning. It happens a lot more now than just having the bride and girls doing the shower thing.
Just help pay for the food at the shower, drinks and help decorate where the event will take place.
The wedding party also plans a bacholer, and bachorette party, but have it joined to make a jack and jill or stag and doe as some call it, which is where everyone gets together about a few months before the wedding, the wedding party sells tickets for the event and take that money and buys food, alcohol and a band or dj. Yous put on a dance and sell alcohol. The money you make from the dance goes to the couple getting married to help them with the wedding.
You can have a speach ready to say if you want, but usually its just the best man and maid of honour that says this. Rather than that just walk down the asile, and durning the whole from now till the wedding call the bride and tell her that you are there to help her with anything she wants.

Answer 3

My friend did this and he stood on the brides side in a tux like the groomsmen! It is becoming more common and don't worry about what anyone says. It's her wedding and she should do what she wants with whom she wants! As for being the bridesmaid, you help throw a shower, plan the bachlorette party and help the bride get ready on the big day! Obviously you will want to get the other bridesmaids to help you with these duties! Have fun - it's a great honor to be asked!

Answer 4

It's an odd request because you are a guy. If it works for you in that you can fit the shoes perfectly and that's what she wants, accept and fulfill with excitement in your heart for her special day and her including you in it in such a special way.

I forgot to add- to give you an idea of what a bridesmaid does, go to theknot.com, enter your friend's wedding date and go to her to-do checklist. This is on her mind. Ask her what she would like help with. Ask her if she would like a Bridal Shower. Communicate with her about the help she will need from you on her special day. A bride needs a go-to person to go take care of things or fix things/arrangements when they don't come out right the first time. The rest is really up to you and her but there's your start! The last week is going to be especially busy so it might be best if you could be really available 24/7 1-2 days up to and 1 day after the wedding. Ultimately, she needs to communicate to you what she needs once you ask her.

Answer 5

Why not do it? Usually when Brides have men on their sides, they call them "BRIDE'S MEN" which is much better than bride's maid. She will probablly have you wear whatever the ushers are wearing (maybe with a different colored vest or tie) and most likely you will walk down the aile with a girl or by yourself. Bridesmaids are just helpers. You help the bride get everything done before the big day. If she askes you to do something..do it. And you have to listen to her complain/talk about everything that needs to get done. You really just support her, which if you are a good friend, you probably do any way. Just skip the shower...it really is girls only and trust me, you don't want to be there. Have fun!!

Answer 6

Belive me she is not going to put you in a dress. You will probably either wear the same tux and vests as the groomsmen or you might wear a tux with a vest that matches the bridesmaids dress colors.

Yes you should do it, more and more these days you will find that men are standing up on the brides side and vice versa. Its not that unusual anymore.

Have a great time!

Answer 7

You should be honored that she asked you. However, I would NOT wear a dress for the occasion. That's just asking too much of a male friend. If she can't accept your wearing a tux or suit, than I would just decline and promise to be there to support her whenever you can.

Being a bridesmaid is all about being supportive of the bride. Running any errands you can help her with, helping with the shower - generally just being there for her!

Answer 8

I'm glad you're seeing this for what it is-firstly, it's about her, not you, secondly, it's an honor to be asked to play such an important role.

If you're worried about how you'll dress, I'm sure if she's savvy enough to feel confident asking a man to be her bridesmaid, she'll help you put together a very classy look.

Bridesmaids help the bride in her planning from beginning to end. They spend time with her, encourage her, lift her spirits when she's feeling overwhelmed, lend a ear when that's all she needs, they help her make decisions about planning aspects large and small.

If she's chosen you, then I'm sure you're already a wonderful friend to her, and you'll do a great job as a bridesman.

Answer 9

First of all, you can't be a bridesmaid because you aren't a woman. And I certainly hope she isn't wanting you to wear a dress! If you do that, you will be the laughingstock of the day! If she wants you to do that, you should decline. You would look absolutely ridiculous.

However, if she wants you to wear a suit or a tux, you can be an attendant.

Answer 10

if she wants all bridesmaids to look the same...then do you have to wear a dress? If so I guess the question to you would you feel comfortable in a dress or whatever she picks out for everyone else? Why can't you stand up for her as a groomsmen? My brother was in my wedding but not as a bridesmaid.