Adult private question, no kids please.?

Question

Sorry, if you dont like the question, please dont answer, please dont leave nasty comments. Thanks
I just met this girl and we kissed once. I dont want a relationship with her, i just want to be friends with benefits (intimate benefits), She seems very materialistic, she likes me a lot though, how do i approach her? I feel she is agree to it, but whats the best way guys and girls to approach this. I dont want to come off too strong. I dont want to lose her friendship, or i guess i could. I need your help. Thanks

Answer 1

I would tell her that you are interested in dating her, then if she agrees you can date her and whatever happens will happen (beneficial wise) then you tell her your not looking for an exclusive relationship. Then you can see other people as well.

Answer 2

This isn't a nasty comment, but why do you want her friendship if she's materialistic? Is this why she may or may not like you in the first place, are you materialistic as well; I mean you sort of doom whatever relationship you could have with her by assuming that she's shallow and she may or may not be. Not all materialistic people are, so you have to figure out what that means to you, if anything.

Friends with benefits is some form of a relationship, and you may want to strengthen the friendship with her first, and see what happens. If there is sexual chemistry there, the friends with benefits thing will happen on it's own. If there isn't then it won't. Yet if you already know what you want from her you should probably tell her and see what happens; but you can't have it both ways with her.

Answer 3

You're going to hurt her if she cares. That's the bottom line, there aren't too many people who have a friends with benefits relationship, and in fact most who do are because of some kind of thing internally, like they don't feel good about themselves or something else. What happens to her if you find a girl you like? What happens if she finds a guy? These are things to consider. You can't just ask her for it.

I think if you're willing to rish the friendship over some nookie that the friendship isn't worth much anyways. Best you just plain cut ties rather than hurt her at all.

Answer 4

I've been approached liek this manyyy times and let me tell you what I've said NO to right away.. and what actually worked..
1. Asking her directly.. i always say no

I could go through the list but i guess bottom line is... don't set an agenda then tell her, its gotta feel real and once you start getting close and intimate with her then just explain to her that you are not ready for a relatioship but you dont want to lose her its just that right now its not a good time. then she'll prbably be understanding and u guys can "fix" the situation by being fwb's. that way u dont burn ur bridges for the future and u get what you think u want right now.

Answer 5

Leave her alone. If you aren't interested for real stay away. Only bad can come from it. She could end up psycho and stock you when you are done with her, pregnant and stuck with her til the kid is at least 18, actually falling for a type that you wouldn't want to marry and of course the STD thing. If she is the kind to fall in bed so easily you had better watch for that, but it sounds to me like she has more to worry from catching one from someone like you that thinks its okay to just jump from girl to girl when you're horny. I hope you realize that even though condoms do help protect against STD's, they aren't much use protecting you from genital warts, you could have the virus now and not even know it. Most men only find out when their wife or girlfriend ends up having a breakout or irregular pap. They don't even check for genital warts when you go in for a STD test, they only check for the major ones. But on the bright side, if you are going to get an STD warts are the one to get, usually the only issue is cosmetic and not health. Get some morals kid, before its too late.

Answer 6

This can be good or bad, becuz eventually the two of u may get into a relationship eventually which is not what u want. Then u must also remember that us females catch feelings faster than guys, so if u do become friends with benefits it is possible that she is going to be expecting a relationship.

Answer 7

The best thing to do is to be "honest". Tell her exactly what you want out of the relationship. She will think the world of you if you don't give her the run around. If you get too close without telling her that you don't want a full time or close relationship, it may be too late and you could find yourself in a much worse position. You will get respect for telling the truth.

Good luck.

Answer 8

I'm sorry if you don't like my answer because I know it's not what you want to hear and it is probably being judgemental.
Don't be a coward! "Friends with benefits" is for cowards. People who are too insecure to take the chance on a commited relationship, too insecure to show some respect for a girl. If you don't respect her enough to date her, than at least don't disrespect her to do that. Respect yourself and wait until you are ready for a responsible relationship to have sex.

Answer 9

Just concentrate on being her good friend for now and if the opportunity arrives that yall both are in the mood then take advantage of it. but if u think the friendship is important, take it slow, but dont b afraid to say nice comments to her and hit on her a lil but keep it to a minimal and try to be cute about it if u can. basically just be yourself!

Answer 10

Well coming from a girl, I'd plan adate and not mention a thing about sex, or anythnig along that lines, and if she also wants it i think you will be able to tell by the way she talks to you. Then if it happeneds again then you are right and she dos want "intimate benifits

Answer 11

You tell her you like hanging out with her, but you aren't ready for a relationship. You have to be careful though. Women get attached, even if they agree to it. You should be with her no longer than three months. And, don't hang out with her on dates, etc. You want the sex, not get to know her. Getting to know each other leads to attachment. I've been down this road because I wasn't ready for a relationship, but looking back, I didn't enjoy that all that much either.