Help with depression?

Question

A friend of mine has recently become very depressed. I really want to help him but he just won't open up. He is dating one of my best friends and although she clearly does, he keeps saying she doesn't love him. He won't talk to his girlfriend about any of the things he his feeling so I was hoping that there was maybe a way I could get him to open up to me. Last week whilst talking to him over the internet he told me he was about to slit his wrists. He came to school the next day wearing four wristbands, so obviously I couldn't see if there were any marks. He has been known for being over dramatic so I don't know if he actually did it, but I know its only a matter of time before something does happen.

Answer 1

I suffered from depression for a few years. Cured it myself and it's sorta trying to rear it's head..in the past few weeks. Here's what I can tell you.

First, you're a good friend for wanting to help and people who suffer from depression (some accept it and some fight it) need people in supportive roles around them...like you. ;)

Second, you need to take his threats seriously, because if you don't, something worse may happen. If that happens, you cannot feel guilty...nothing was your fault...they are his choices. If he's faking it, then maybe your attentiveness will snap him out of his game.

Third, why does he have depression...do you know what caused it? Trauma in his past? Or now? Is he seeing a psychologist or psychiatrist? They do help. Or is it caused by vitamin deficieincies? That can be easily fixed...that's what my depression was from the first time. I think there are other people who have a imbalance...maybe genetic.

Being in the life of someone with a mental illness can be difficult for many reasons. It may get better, it may get worse...it all depends on how he is with it. Some people WANT to get better...others seem to be so ill from it...they can't find their way. If you decide you cannot 'do' it...that's okay...you are NOT RESPONSIBLE for him. Years ago I had to walk away from a situation like yours...and I had too.

He needs to talk to someone...question him on who he'd trust talking too...

Also...maybe he's not on the right med. There are soooo many options, medicine and herbal....and if he's not feeling better, changing to a new med may be a good idea.

Good luck...be thinking about you and hoping for the best! :) Again, thanks for supporting him...

Answer 2

Hi Help me,

You have been put in a tight situation. There can be people who are dramatic or what appears to be dramatic as far as others are concerned, but this is the only way your friend has possibly learnt to communicate in order to be heard. I urge you to speak to a school counsellor to get help for him, if you wait to long it may be to late and he will have ended his life.

Be prepared for the worse case scenario that your friend could get upset with you for going to a counsellor and getting him help which for your sake I hope doesn't happen. You can't give up, he will thank you later on when he gets better and despite his possible anger, reassure him that you will be there for him if he needs someone to talk to. I hope and pray all goes well in that your able to find him the help and that he gets better.



Sincerely,

Alice H.

Answer 3

If you want to help your friend and he seems that he might be a danger to himself I would URGE you to seek professional help in your area. Samaritans are on the other side of the phone 24h or your local GP can point you in the right direction. People with mental problems such as depression sometimes do not want to be helped, low self esteem, lack of motivation...etc. Depression is a serious condition but it can be easily treated. Better safe than sorry!
Good luck!!!!!

Answer 4

Really difficult for you to handle... Sensitively. Seek advice from a teacher that you can trust. Ask to see his arms. Offer to go with him to talk to someone else, or his girlfriend. I have found in my experience (and I may be wrong!) that those who threaten suicide very rarely do it, it tends to be the ones who don't open up at all, but please don't use that as a guideline.

Answer 5

I don't think there is any real known help for depression. But I would suggest you don't try to make things worse. Good luck, it'll work out one way or the other eventually.

Answer 6

i know this may be a harsh answer but he must help himself.others can try like you and his girlfriend have,to no axail.all seems like attention seeking and try making him see the funny side of things.i know this sounds mad but if he says hes gonna kill himself again.just tell him ok ill be over to help you as im feeling down too.sounds like instead of giving him attention,try and divert it..i know as i was once pretty dramatic in my teens.till family got fed up and then it was time for me to toughen up.harsh but true good luck x

Answer 7

You need to tell his tutor or form teacher or head of year - this is not your responsibility and you should not bear this burden on your own. The teachers I mentioned are best placed to deal with it and would really appreciate it if you approached them about this sensitive subject.

Answer 8

I cut my wrists and i have depression.
So you could speak to his mum and just mention that he has been really low and your worried about him.
you have to tell someone about your worry about him because i can be to late i am not trying to scare you but with me i have tried to kill myself 4 times and i am only 13 and only on the 4th atemped they got me a pyciatrist. Speak to someone sooner than later.

xxxXGood Luck Xxxx

Answer 9

tell him to see a counsellor listen to him telll him he is loved and well and valuable God loves him. he is precious and stop thinking and believing crap about himself.