I have been with my boyfriend for about a month and a half now. We have been spending a lot more time together lately and we both really care about each other. I am still a virgin, but he doesn't know that. He is a few years older than me (we are both in our twenties) and has a good bit of experience. I am not waiting for mariage or anything, I just haven't been with someone I was ready to share that with.
Should I tell him I am still a virgin? If so, how do I bring it up and do you think it will change how he feels about me?
2007-02-08 05:38:20 · 25 answers · asked by southernbell 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Honesty is always best in any relationship, especially an intimate one. Since you two are close, I think telling him is a good idea. If he truly cares for you, this will not change anything between you two. Good luck!
2007-02-08 05:40:40 · answer #1 · answered by jude7265 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Please dont listen to the men that have made comments on here. You have been dating this guy for a month and a half you spend lots of time together but you dont know him that well to give up your virginity really. I can see if you have been together a year are so but its only been a month and a half your still trying to figrue each other out or better get to know each other. I know you dont want to wait until marriage but just give it a little more time before you do anything. If you do decide to tell him he may start to pressure you about sex eventhough he is a few years older than you. You never know but dont risk it just see how you feel about him a few months from now before you tell him anything.
2007-02-08 13:50:54 · answer #2 · answered by cuttie1972 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes you should tell him that you are a virgin. don't be in no rush, if you are not ready. trust me he will understand ,if he doesn't then the month that you been with him doesn't really matter because he just might be there for sex. if he wait until you are ready then he is a respectful man. you might want to bring it up a.s.a.p, because most guys think that after a few months that sex is the next level. so when you are together just tell what is on your mind. and you will be relieve , just like you told the others your situation. that shouldn't change how he feels because he now will know that you haven't been with no one else.
2007-02-08 13:53:02 · answer #3 · answered by talltina 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I AM PROUD OF YOU! Not many girls in their 20's are still virgins. I would really make sure that this is the one. Are you sure after only a month and 1/2? Well after I thought about him being your first, if it really felt right I would talk to him about it. I'm sure if he did feel different about you, it would be in a better way. Being a virgin IS NOT a bad thing. My grandma always told me," You have something that your friends will never have again, You can always be like them, but they can never be like you" I hope I helped a little. Good Luck!
2007-02-08 13:47:42 · answer #4 · answered by brandy1979 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeah tell that you are still a virgin that way you can see what his reaction really is.....like......oh baby i understand, we can take our time(you keep him) or WHAT you still a virgin (in his mind he will brag)...(you keep him hanging on just to see if he will change) or awwww shi* this is going to be good popping a virgin (drop him like it's hot) stay a virgin until you feel that YOU have found the right person. Just watch out for the body language. I wish I was still a virgin.
Good Luck and Best Wishes,
Kimberly H
2007-02-08 13:49:21 · answer #5 · answered by Kimberly H 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he automatically wants to move right into the sex, he's not in it for the right reasons. When a girl tells a guy she's a virgin, we (men) feel a lot of pressure if we are in it for the right reasons. Reason being, you've waited this long, obviously you've been waiting for "the one". So, you telling him that you want him to be your first is going to freak him out, unless he's a "virgin slayer". then he won't be freaked out at all, he'll just want to get it in you as fast as possible.
It's a beautiful thing, being a virgin. If you where my girl, I'd ask you to wait until we where at leat engaged.
2007-02-08 13:45:26 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I admire the fact that you have maintained your virginity. If you do not want to have sex with your bf, the next time things get hot and heavy let him know that you haven't ever gone any further. He'll take the hint. Or you can bite the bullet and bring it up the next time you talk to him.
2007-02-08 13:42:37 · answer #7 · answered by Brittny M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would save telling him until you start getting sexually active with him. If he starts doing stuff that you feel might lead to sex, just straight up tell him that you're a virgin and that you want your first time to be with someone you're ready to do it with. You should decide, also, if you are ready to have sex with this guy. It's a big decision.
2007-02-08 13:43:01 · answer #8 · answered by Remi Hime 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Definitely tell him. If you're ready to be intimate then you're ready to talk about it.
It sounds like you're the kind of person that doesn't take sex as a sport which means that you probably see sex as a way of becoming closer in your relationship so therefore talking, sharing and opening up is all about being close. Talk to him about it.
2007-02-08 15:07:15 · answer #9 · answered by Lonely Bàstard 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well first off good for you for waiting. Second of all if it changes how he feel for you then move on. Don't give up such a precious that like your viginaty to a man who will not apprecate it. Third of all use a condom it has been around you don't want to catch anything.
Good luck
2007-02-08 13:43:24 · answer #10 · answered by Dawn S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋