Parents of two or more children..do you expect both your children too..?

Question

be invited to other children's birthday parties when the children are not the same age? Do you allow your children to have seperate playdates? I have one child but sometimes parents actually get angry over this or make nasty comments..unless they are family or very close friends..why should I have to do this?
Same with Christams presents...why should I have to buy two gifts?
I don't get it!

Answer 1

I have 3 kids and NO I do not expect all of my kids to be invited when someone is having a birthday party. Its so rude when people bring all the kids they have to a party that only one of their kids is invited to. My child hangs around with a boy who has a twin brother. When he is invited to the twins birthday party I buy for the one boy he hangs out with, not both. People think just because they have more then one kid that its a free for all to bring all of them. If one of mine is invited somewhere, and I cannot find a sitter for the other ones...I dont go, plain and simple. As far as gifts go, If I have a friend with more then one child...at christmas, we simply wouldnt exchange if I was expected to by for all her kids.

Answer 2

I don't expect both of my children to be invited to a party or playdate. However, as a single parent (widow) I really appreciate it if both can be included. I simply cannot arrange child care for the "other" one all the time, so I think it is nice...but I always ask and sometimes this means that we can't accept every invitation. As for buying separate Christmas gifts, I don't see why you would have a problem with this. Of course, children want their own gifts. But if you don't want to, you could get something that might be easily shared, for both of them.

Answer 3

i am a mother or two boys and one more on the way. they are not school age yet but when they are if they are invitited to a party then the one that is invited should be the only one that goes. as for the gifts. its a little hard for a mother if one child gets a present and the other one does not. like at there birthday party and they get all these presents and the other was feels left out. we usually give the gift bags our right after the presents so all the kids feel they get something too. they are younger though so that may get better when they get bigger. i don't exspect everyone to give something to each of my children. my boys are great with sharing. i think that you should buy for your childs friend and only your childs friend if thats how you feel. don't worry about what they say. good luck

Answer 4

I have two boys, 8 and 10. And no, I do not expect for both my boys to be invited to the same parties. I have explained to them that if they weren't invited by the other's friend, then they can't go. They get and accept it.
As for the gifts, the same applies. But really I've only prepared them for the situations because my oldest son's best friend's family treat my boys equally.
Siblings should learn to get along with each other and each other friends, but they should be allowed to have separate playdates from time to time.

Answer 5

I have 2 boys (ages 4 & 8) my 8 year old gets invited to birthday parties and is invited over to his friends houses all the time. But I would never make my 4 year old go with him. I just don't think it's fair to the children. But I let it be known that if the children are playing at my house then yes they will be required to let my 4 year old play too.

And as for bithday parties for my boys, we really don't invite any of there friends anyways, we normaly just go out to eat as a family or something. But even if we did have a party for one of them, then NO I wouldn't expect anyone to bring ether one of my boys a gift, no matter who's birthday it was. We would be inviting the friends to the party, as guests, people we wanted to be there, not as a way to get more toys. Although if my older son had a B-Day party and his friends had little brothers and sisters my youngest son's age then YES I would invite them to, just so my 4 year old woud have other kids his own age to play with too. We had our kids, we can take care of our kids, we buy our kids whathey need and we don't need anyone else to buy them anything.

Answer 6

I have 3 kids and yes they have seperate play dates and parties they go to, if for some reason I have to bring the other kids w/me I always ask first if the other person says no I just reschedule the playdate if it's a b-day I will just send a gift and skip the party

Answer 7

I have four children, three of school age, the first children are twins and they do tend to be invited to parties together although they have been invited seperately to friends and this is fine as they both have seperate friends, my little one who is only in her first yr at school as also started being invited to parties but I dont expect the boys to go to these too

Answer 8

My children have very different social circles and no, I never expected them to be invited en masse to a playdate or party. You are in charge of your child's social arrangements, it's unfair for another parent to make you feel bad about not inviting every kid on the block. We also don't give our kids' friends Christmas presents, only our godchildren (but not their siblings since they have godparents too).

Answer 9

I certainly don't expect it, in fact, if I had TWINS I wouldn't expect them both to be invited to the same birthday parties.
We are very family oriented though, and often our kids don't want to be at parties where their siblings aren't wanted. They'll choose not to go to playdates that are age specific, and even my oldest doesn't go to field trips that are age limited.

Answer 10

No..I don't expect it unless it's a family friend and all the kids play together regardless. My kids have their own friends as well and have separate play dates. My oldest daughter once invited a friend over and her Mom said she can come but only if the little sister could come..my daughter did not want the little sister to come so sadly..there was no play date.