When fighting with BOYFRIEND...should I make my decisions when MAD? Or when I CALMED down?? (Leave him or not

Question

Well when Im mad (like right now) I wanna leave him...and I have a HUGE list of reasons to leave etc...
But than tomorrow morning I'll be all happily in love again..with noproblems that come to mind....
which is the way I should go???? I heard u should calm down befor makign decisions but???? when Im mad... where does all this stuff come that I think of???? when Im madI wanna leave so bad and feel like I hate him and wanna hurt him etc...
But when not fighting...total opposite..

Answer 1

I ALWAYS MAKE THE BEST DECISIONS WHEN I AM MAD !!

Answer 2

Well as you should know things said in an arguement can be said without proper thought, or the feelings that you feel at the moment may affect what you say or how you come across. the best way to deal with your problems is to discuss them when things haven't built up to boiling point. maybe even talking at a park or some other neutral place will help, but try to keep your cool, and be open to criticism and take a look at how you are behaving. Good Luck!!

Answer 3

ok well im no expert but i always try to put everything into percpective and i write a list of pros and cons. youre right about the making decisions when youre angry thing. its not good. youre mind is in an irrational state. just think about it. write what you love about the relationship and what u dislike and look which is more important for you. if you fight often then your relationship may have issues and talking them through is the best thing. tell him how u feel. but make sure you know how you yourself feel first. ok just reminding u im not an expert and im not that sure that my advice will help you but i hope it will.

Answer 4

Never make a Decision when your mad or angry. When you do get mad or angry at him though and start thinking about all these reasons start writing them down. Then talk to a trusted friend or someone you feel that will listen and give an honest opinion. explain to them your reasons that you wrote down and then get their advice on what you should do. It might just prove to be rather helpful.

Answer 5

don't do anything that you may regret later, your mad at him right now and it's normal to think the way that your thinking right now for example my friend got mad at her boyfriend at a party and stormed out on him in the middle of the night and almost got raped by a stranger b/c of the poor decision she made, but she did it b/c she was mad at him and she wasn't thinking clearly...and it's like that for you b/c your not thinking clearly right now...your thinking bad thoughts but as you simmer down those bad thoughts will vanish, so i really think you should cool down for now and what ever decision you make... you can say that you made with a clear mind so there won't be any regrets good luck!

Answer 6

i think what you're saying is very very right, and i think you should make your decisions when you're calm. when you're angry you dont tend to think, words come out that you can regret saying, things happen that you dont mean to happen and things arent exactly handy dandy. obviously when you're upset negative thoughts tend to come to mind because well, you're angry.. you want to be right and you're going to FIGHT for what YOU want and what YOU think is right even if in the end its not the best decision. but yes, thats what happens when you're mad. you dont think before you say or act.

now.. after you've had an argument, give yourself time.. think about everything you said and have you little moment then think about what HE said and analyse it and see if theres anything there you think is true (from what he said..). if there is, even if you know insde that you're still right, give him a little bit of credit and note it down. like you, he obviously blurted out a few things he probably shouldn't have but some things might have some significance.

seeing as a fight is a two way thing, you gotta see the two sides of the conflict, not just yours and not just his (thus, blaming yourself.)

okay. well after you've contemplated, think to yourself if you're gonna be able to cope with things like this later. did you two say REALLY bad things that you think you wouldnt be able to handle later? or were they small trivial things you can work through together? if so, then maybe after the fight, have the courage to be the one to apologize and try to make mends.. i knwo i know.. we need our pride, but sometimes if you want things to work, you gotta put your foot down first, i mean true love IS when you're willing to fight while holding hands =]

now.. like i said just ask your selves questions.. WHY do i want to leave him? was it because of the fight? or am i just saying that.. just things like that to help you decided if the cons and greater than the pros. you might end up deciding NOT to break up with him because you realise sometimes in the fights he means good.. but then you might to decide to break up because you just cant take it.

basically what im saying it, let yourself think and give yourself time to think about what you want. you dont want to make a decision while you're angry because ONE, you're unsure (which is why you came here to ask) and TWO because you might just end up regretting it and sometimes after you've parted, pride can get the better of you, you know? so yes, after you've calmed down for sure. your decisions go both ways, if you want to leave, then dont stop yourself just because you feel happy.. think about what YOU want and how he will affect you later

all the best =]

Answer 7

hi girl, u knw wht should u do go to a relaxed plce n calm urself thn take steps slowly belive me it will help u alot. even listen to a relaxed music with da soft sound ones.cool ur mind first my friend. we;l wish u all da best wth ur boyfriend hope u settle every thng

Answer 8

Always calm down first so that you can think rationally...NEVER make any descisions when you are mad...it's always the wrong one.

Answer 9

if no one will accept loser, ur relationship will destroy and nothing at the end. don't make your pride lead your relationship.