Blonde Jokes......?

Question

A brunette walks into the doctor's office and says, "My body hurts wherever I touch it."

The doctor says, "Show me."

She takes her finger and pushes her elbow, and she screams in agony. Then she pushes her knee and screams. Then she pushes her ankle and screams.

The doctor says, "You're not really a brunette are you? You're really a blonde."

She says, "Yeah. How did you know?"

He says, "Your finger is broken."

Answer 1

LOL.//
Why do blondes like lightning?
They think someone is taking their picture!

Answer 2

thats one of the funniest I've heard! hre are a few I just told some one else






what do you call a dead blonde in a closet? last years 'hide n' seek' winer
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there were two blodes passing a feild of wheat. in the middle of the field was another blonde in a rowboat obviously trying to row the boat across the field. the blonde driving turns to her friend and says "its blondes like that that make us look stupid!" and her friend replies "I know it! and if I knew how to swim, I'd tell her she's rowing against the wind!" (optional ending; "if I knew how to swim, I'd g out there and drown her")
(love that one)
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a blonde walks into a fabric store and asks for help measuring curtains. the man helping her asks what size she needs, and she says 1 foot by 9 inches. the man asks what window its going on, because it seems so small, and she replies, 'oh,its not for a window, its for my computer" but miss, says the man, computers do't need curtains. the blonde replies "helllloooowww! I've got Widows!"

kinda dumb, but still funny!
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One day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck.

The truck's driver made her pull over into a parking lot and get out of the car.

He took a piece of chalk and drew a circle on the pavement. He told her to stand in the middle and not leave the circle.

Furious, he went over to her car and slashed the tires.

The blonde started laughing.

This made the man angrier so he smashed her windshield.

This time the blonde laughed even harder.

Livid, the man broke all her windows and keyed her car.

The blonde is now laughing hysterically, so the truck driver asks her what's so funny.

The blonde giggles and replies, "When you weren't looking, I stepped out of the circle three times!"

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A blind guy on a bar stool shouts to the bartender, "Wanna hear a blonde joke?"

In a hushed voice, the guy next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, you should know something."

Our bartender IS blonde, the bouncer is blonde. I'm a 6' tall, 200 lb black belt. The guy sitting next to me is 6'2", weighs 225, and he's a rugby player. The fella to your right is 6'5" pushing 300 and he's a wrestler. Each one of US is blonde. Think about it, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?"

The blind guy says, "Nah, not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."
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Two blonds where in Oklahoma. One says, which is closer: the moon or Florida? The other says: heeeeellloooo? Can you SEE Florida?
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A brunette, a redhead, and a blonde get lost in the forest. They start walking around, and suddenly, they find a mirror. It has a reading on the top: say a lie in front of this mirror and you’ll disappear to a better world. So the brunette goes first. She says: “I think I’m the most beautiful woman on the Earth”, and she disappears. The redhead goes next: “I think I’m the most intelligent person on Earth”, and she vanishes. The blonde walks forward, and steps in front of the mirror. She starts talking: “I think…” and she vanishes.
stupid...but still funny
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A blonde decides one day that she is sick and tired of all these blonde jokes and how all blondes are perceived as stupid, so she decides to show her husband that blondes really are smart. While her husband is off at work, she decides that she is going to paint a couple of rooms in the house. The next day, right after her husband leaves for work, she gets down to the task at hand. Her husband arrives home at 5:30 and smells the distinctive smell of paint. He walks into the living room and finds his wife lying on the floor in a pool of sweat. He notices that she is wearing a ski jacket and a fur coat at the same time.
He goes over and asks her if she is ok. She replies yes. He asks what she is doing. She replies that she wanted to prove to him that not all blonde women are dumb and she wanted to do it by painting the house.
He then asks her why she has a ski jacket and a fur coat on.
She replies that she was reading the directions on the paint can and it said, "For best results, put on two coats".
(love it!)
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A blonde was standing in front of a coke machine, she put in 50 cents and a coke came out. She set it on top of the coke machine. Put in 50 more cents pushed the button and another coke came out.
She kept doing this until a guy standing behind her said, "Excuse me, can I get my coke and then you can go back to what ever you are doing?"
The blonde turns around and says, "Like duh not when I am winning!!"

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What did the blonde say when she looked in the Cheerio box?
Ah!, Look! Donut seeds!



thats all I have for blonde jokes, hope you all liked them!

Answer 3

A slight change in an old joke. 2/10

Answer 4

Here's one for you:

a blond got tired of being called a blond and stupid so she she cut her hair and dyed it brown. to test her new intelligence she went to a Shepard and said if i can tell you how many sheep you have can i have one? The Shepard agrees. She guesses right and the Shepard asks if i can guess your natural hair color can i have my dog back?

Answer 5

Hey that was actually pretty funny!
Good one!

Answer 6

Betcha' she broke her finger while dyeing her hair!

Answer 7

Thank you, that is funny joke. I laughed

Answer 8

lol great 10/10 & a star*

Answer 9

That was a good one, I enjoyed it! Thank you!

Answer 10

heard it before but it's still funny