My boyfriend is 31 and still living at home with momma. We have been going out for almost 3yrs., he stays home all the time. Never comes over. When he is sick or hurt...who takes care of him? Huh need not ask, MOMMA. He recently feel and broke his arm, when his mother arrived, I was told to get out of the ambulance and let her ride, no he didn't stand up for me. The other day when he had his doctor appt. she took off work to take him, I did too thinking I would be the one, I was instead asked to ride along with them...NOT. I passed. He has even missed a Valentines Day to go spend it watching Nascar with his family instead. I have two kids and He Never does anything with us. He acts like a big ol' baby about everthing. My daughter poked him in the eye one time and he held it and nursed it for a intire day and night, no blood spot was there either. I could go on forever. But you all would really be questioning my inteligance. My Question is " Do Momma's Boys EVER GROW UP?????? Is there anyone out there that has seen the miracle of a mommas boy getting off the nip?
2007-02-07 16:21:26 · 10 answers · asked by Desperate to get out of it? 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I would like to add a few things. I have been sooo independent for so many years, raising my kids alone was no problem, paying my own bills, doing my own lawn care, repairing my vehicle when needed, and the list goes on. However, since I have been with this 31yr.old baby, I have become so down that I feel like I have lost all the qualities about myself, why is that? I can't help but ask myself what has happened to me. I have always been so strong and would not walk but run away from a looser boyfriend in a heartbeat before, I can't believe I am still with this guy. I am 34 and way deserving of a great man in my life, why do women stay with someone like this? I always looked at women in my own situation and said Quote"What is wrong with her?" "Is she that desperate to stay with someone like that", and Here I Am! I feel like I am losing my mind on this deal, I am going crazy, wanting to end it......but haven't! I don't understand myself right now! He truely DOESNOT deserve me!
2007-02-07 16:33:26 · update #1
Oh, what a patient person you are!!
It sounds to me like your boyfriend has been spoiled rotten all of his life. His mother seems to be the fuel to that fire, for sure.
It behooves me why this man would need an ambulance for a broken arm! I've broken bones several times and have driven myself to the hospital. Hmmm.... Low tolerance for pain there, huh? So what was the deal with the eye incident? A little girl whipped up on him, and he needed nursing? That's pretty shameful. I wonder what would happen if he needed to step to your defense in a dangerous situation. Could he produce? Doubtful.
Pretty much what you have here is another child, not a man. And if he cannot stand up and be a man, even in these small matters, what is he going to do when times get hard and you really need to rely on him to support you as a partner? You might want to think that over. I don't see him being there for you as he should.
Another thing to consider..... if you were to pursue a more permanent relationship with him, you would definitely be considered the "wedge" between he and his mother. No matter what happens, you would be the one taking it on the chin and the mother would come out smelling like roses. Are you ready to live like that ?
I also believe that the mother would be a constant burr in your saddle, constantly in competition with you for this man. And I honestly believe that this man is no prize in which you need to compete for.
I personally think that you and your children need a person with backbone in your family. Especially your kids. All kids look to adults for leadership, and this man is apparently no leader. That role will fall onto you. Do you really need another needy child on your hands? I think that would be the case if you stayed with him. I cannot tell you what to do, most certainly, but I honestly believe that you should tell him to go to the only woman who will ever be in his life, his mother. And that you will seek a man who gives you the respect you deserve, and the support that you need.
Best wishes to you.
2007-02-07 16:39:18 · answer #1 · answered by C J 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry sweetie but mommas boys never grow up they just move in with their gf and expect them to take over the momma role. Tell him to grow up. I have 3 kids and i tell you what, the last thing i need is an adult acting like a kid. Had that for 10 years & just recently booted him out the door. You get sick of being a mum after a while espescially to a full grown man.
2007-02-07 16:28:19 · answer #2 · answered by jimmychick78 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's good for a man to love his mother, but the situation you described does sound a bit freaky. It's even okay for a man to live with his mother/father; I know several well-off men who still live with their parents to save more money for their futures.
However, the way he sticks to his mother is to the extreme. The part about him standing you up for Valentine's Day sounds especially weird; that's a day for lovers -- mama's boy or not. by the age of 31, he has already become who he is going to be for the rest of his life. Dump the freakin' weirdo.
2007-02-07 16:31:39 · answer #3 · answered by Mr. Reality 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, Momma's boys do not grow up. They make lousy husbands. They run home to Momma when things get tough. Momma always sides with her son. You will have a world of grief if you marry this guy.
2007-02-07 16:26:13 · answer #4 · answered by ne11 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honestly.... if you can get him out off his mothers house then I could say that's a start.
I grown man still living with his mother when he reaches 30 is a baby that won't grow-up so if he gets his butt out of his mom's house it will be his first step in becoming a real man! ^_^
So let him make a choice... if he wants to develop the relationship that you have he get's out of his mom's house or you break the ties and let you find another man... simple as that.
2007-02-07 16:30:21 · answer #5 · answered by Jean Paul 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh my gosh! I thought my husband was a mama's boy. But after reading your story, I know what a real mama's boy is now. Let him go. You have 2 kids to take care of, You don't need a third.
2007-02-07 16:34:49 · answer #6 · answered by Soldiers Wife 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Mamma's boy's are mamma's boys as long as mamma's near.
Time for you to move on an find a real man!
2007-02-07 16:32:57 · answer #7 · answered by Jim 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Either you brake up with him or talk to him he has to understand if he wants to be with you he will change.
=]
2007-02-07 16:25:53 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
get rid of him. he has no respect for you because he has mommy. you can find someone a lot more grown up. trust me.
2007-02-07 16:24:53 · answer #9 · answered by pikachu 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
uummm, he's 31. he's not going to grow out of it. why the hell are you with him? leave!!!!
2007-02-07 16:28:18 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋