2007-02-07 15:13:44 · 36 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
Don't feel pressured to marry her just because you are having a baby together. That is not the right reason to get married. Marry her if you are sure that you want to stay with her for the rest of your life. I've had so many friends who had babies young and got married because of it. I can tell you that now all but one of the couples are divorced. Marriage is hard enough. Don't do it just because you think it's the right thing to do right now. It won't make any difference in your parenting skills if you are married. What matters is that baby. If you two get married for the wrong reasons and aren't happy, that baby is the one that will suffer. I think you should wait and make sure that this is something that you really want to do. Get engaged if you really want to do something. Wait a year after the baby is born to marry. Having a baby is one of the biggest stresses you will have on your relationship. If you can survive that and still say that you want to marry her than go for it! Well, this is just my opinion. Do what is best for you and take all into consideration! Good luck and congrats!
2007-02-07 15:24:55 · answer #1 · answered by cutesy76 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
That is completely up to you and your Girlfriend. How does she feel about it? I was 6mths pregnant at my wedding and that was only because we had picked a wedding date and then found out i was pregnant and the baby was due 4day after. Bea cause we were going to get married anyway we decided to have it earlier. Our first Daughter was born out of wedlock, now a days i don't think it really matters , i know people who's children are 21 and 14 and still aren't married. Everyone has there own opinion on the subject. As march is so close i would probably wait until the baby was born as its not cheap, and if u don't want to rush wait until the child is a little older and can be involved in the wedding Example : Flower girl like my older daughter was at the age of 18mths. Good Luck with the future
2007-02-07 15:27:10 · answer #2 · answered by channy_simon 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It's all up to you. Personally, my boyfriend and I want to wait till we've had the baby to get married, because I don't want to have a shotgun wedding "just because" I'm pregnant. I think it will be more meaningful if we do it when we are ready, not when everyone else would be more comfortable...and if that's all it is, getting married now to make everyone else happy, it may not make you happy. Even if it's for so-called religious reasons...those religions probably meant not to conceive the baby out of wedlock in the first place, so what's the point in trying to pretend like it didn't happen by getting married after the fact? That's just my opinion. Plus I don't want to have my wedding while I'm huge, and I don't want to spend money on a ceremony when it would be better spent on my child's care.
But some women are glowing when they're pregnant, so she could still feel like a princess on her big day...and if you have family who's willing to help pay for the ceremony, that's great too! As for when the time is right, that's all up to you and your girl. Think about it this way...would you two be getting married right now if you didn't feel like you "had to"? If the answer is yes, then go for it.
Good luck!
2007-02-07 15:26:02 · answer #3 · answered by grayhare 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Were you going to get married before you got pregnant?
If you weren't really sure about marriage then....you ought to hold off. Getting married because you're pregnant can be a big mistake. Stay together...wait until the baby gets a little older, and if you still feel committed to one another, then marry.
No matter what, you have committed your lives to this child....but whether it's together or separately is something you both need to be honest about.
Good luck & take your time. If your baby is loved & provided for that's all that matters.
2007-02-07 15:25:44 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
The general consensus is before, but you gotta think, too, that if you do it before, everyone will assume that you only did it because of the baby, not because you're really in love.
My boyfriend and I had been planning a July of 06 wedding, but when we foudn out I was pregnant, due in Feb of 06, we decided to push the wedding back at least a year. See, we hadn't announced our engagement yet, and I had a cousin that had just been the bride in a shotgun wedding, and we didn't want everyone to think our situation was the same.
So you've really got to weigh everything on both sides of the equation. I can't tell you what to do in your situation because of the tiny amount of information given, but just be aware that if you ARE only marrying for the baby, and the marriage fails, then you may both end up being angry with the child, and that is unfair. There's no need to marry just because of the baby, as a child will be happier in a happy, single-parent house than with two angry, fighting parents.
Good luck, congratulations on the baby, and I hope everything works out for all three of you!
2007-02-07 15:21:38 · answer #5 · answered by Queen Queso 6 · 4⤊ 1⤋
The Bible says that unmarried people who sleep together outside of marriage should get married. So just get married already! Your child will figure out that you got married after she was pregnant but don't make the problem worse by waiting forever. Be a good example from now on for your wonderfull child.
2007-02-07 15:32:07 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Before.
2007-02-07 15:20:44 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
depends..Are you getting married because she is having your baby, or because You honestly love her and want to spend the rest of you life together. If it was me I would wait, Let say for some reason down the line things don't work out and you get divorced. I don't care what the conditions were for getting married, but your child is going to think well they got pregnant because of me now they are divorcing because of me.
2007-02-07 18:41:05 · answer #8 · answered by medleyc1 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Did you propose to her? Does she want to get married before the baby is born? Or is she planning to wear a pretty wedding gown walking down the aisle?
Discuss it with her. You will find a solution that both of you will enjoy.
2007-02-07 15:23:42 · answer #9 · answered by Kimora Miranda 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
if she's due in march u should probably wait u wouldnt want to put too much on her. it would be so beautiful to bring a child into the world by a married couple. either way it goes its going to be beautiful. congratulations on the baby and your marriage . it aint too many good men or couples that would actually want to marry these days.
2007-02-07 15:23:29 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋