Should my both my girlfriend and my name be on the loan and house?

Question

My girlfriend and I have talked about marriage and children and now in July about moving in together. She told me she doesnt want to put me on the loan or house just in case we arent together in 3 yrs, she doesnt want to put up with that **** she says. I told her that we arent moving in as friends but as a couple who plan to get married. If she wants to do this she is planning a future without me. I believe that moving in together as a couple like we are that we should share the loan and house equally. If I were to think about it the way she does then I would be shafted in the 3 years where I would be paying 1/2 or more and repairs and then I would have nothing and she would have everything. But Im not thinking of it that way, Im thinking of it as a committment and that we should share this responsibilty of our relationship together and if the relationship were to end then we would sell the house and move on. We shouldnt even be thinking of living together if we cant make thisagreement

Answer 1

A very legitimate question. Although you want to have this done in the spirit of commitment and the future, do you really want to pay half a mortgage and put equity in her name only? You're right, she is planning a future without you. You need to have a serious talk with her about her intentions with the relationship.

Answer 2

I think you answered your own question. You shouldn't even be thinking of living together if you can't make this agreement. Let her buy the house, get yourself your own place. If after a couple years you decide to get married and finally do then you can move in and have your name added. She obviously doesn't know if you are the "one". Give her her space. They say distance makes the heart grow stronger.

Answer 3

I don't think you should put the house under both of your names. She already mentioned to you that you guys might not be together in three years, so there's a hint. She's probably not ready for a commitment yet. Just stay in an apartment together and save money until you're engaged to buy a house.

Answer 4

You've got 2 choices.
1.)Get married, and get the loan jointly...
-or-
2.) Stay "dating", and after the house is all paid off, look like a
dummy if she kicks you out.

Either way, it's foolish to "PLAY House"...So don't be stupid...

Ps. She trusts you enough to let you help PAY for the house, but not enough to put your name on the loan???You guys need counseling already! lol

Answer 5

Assuming she owns the home. You shouldn't expect her to put you on the loan right away. And at the same time you should only be paying for a room rental. She can use her mortgage as a tax write of while you cannot. No right to expect to be put on mortgage but at same time should only pay fair market price for room rental.

Answer 6

Since you 2 r planning on marrying, why dun you married 1st then only live together?But i c your point,discuss it with her...try to compromise....There are more issues to discuss later on in yr lifes and if u cant even resolve this, you are heading nowhere.

Answer 7

Dude.

Stop being logical.

Go to City hall. Get married first and then demand to have your name added to the house.

If not, you are just blowing smoke up her behind!

Stop playing games and get the damn license and then get the house jointly. That is the BEST hand you can play.

Answer 8

Not unless you plan on marrying her

Answer 9

Maybe you should just go ahead and get married. problem solved.

Answer 10

Then why don't you ask her to marry you?