It was both of their senior yrs in high school this year. his friend had been struggling with cancer for about a yr or so i believe and he had been on bed rest for a ccouple of months hooked up to all kinds of equipment and he passed away monday. My boyfriend is TORN his heart is broken to peices and i don't even know what to say to him any more. Last night we didin't even talk on the phone for 1 whole minute because he told me he was just too hurt to talk to anyone and he wanted to just be alone. so i told him i loved him and call me if he had any trouble sleeping or anything, then today he didn't come to school, he pretty much stayed home all day and slept i guess. I feel sooo badly for him especially because we were just talking about him about a week ago and how he was doing and now this.He's called me today, but its been pretty silent on this phone. He's so depressed i just need to know how can i help him get through and what can i do to help him?
RIP ANT
2007-02-07 12:54:03 · 14 answers · asked by t0xic_n_addictiv3 2 in Health ➔ Diseases & Conditions ➔ Cancer
Every individual grieves differently, just be there for him. Since they were so close think of something special he could do in his memory. Example : plant a tree at the school in his name- start a scholarship in his name, do something that this boy loved to keep his memory in the community and the school. We have done this with children in our district we have lost. Only time heals the heart.
2007-02-07 13:08:45 · answer #1 · answered by Lady X 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
here is some advice, don't listen to "Fabsinger" person.....don't say anything she or he said...let the man cope with what just happn. time will heal and i hope things get better soon but it is a time thing, never get mad if he wants to be alone. he's tring to realized what just happen. i lost 5 friend when i was in HS, 2 from cance, 3 from a car accident....i just go back to where we use to party (baseball field, lol) and listen to some music and think about things....Ill pray for you that he gets better:)
2007-02-07 17:15:37 · answer #2 · answered by pharmtechkal 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just don't pressure him or 'bother' him. All he needs is for you to be there when he's ready to open up or be himself again. The crappy thing about losing someone close to you, is that there is no handbook or guidelines for you friends & family to help you through it other than to be there for you. If you call him too much or press him, you will only add to his frustration and push him away.
2007-02-07 12:59:18 · answer #3 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd be depressed, too if my best bud past 2 days ago. Give the man some time to cope-- Give him the opportunity to talk about it and LISTEN when he's ready, but don't push it. This is going to take some time.
2007-02-07 12:58:43 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Time heals most things. So the best thing to do is to just be suppotive and don't push him. Also, when he ask to be alone sometimes or doesn't want to talk, don't feel insulted or anything just let him be alone. Its always hard losing a loved one. Just be there for him when he needs you.
2007-02-07 12:57:56 · answer #5 · answered by Dr.LLP BunBun 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Wow I Have to wipe my tears away just so I can answer your question.
Just go to him and give him a big hug , don't say a word just hold on to him really tight. He needs to be consoled.
It's hard to get over the pain of losing someone you hold dear to your heart. I have lost many, the silent hugs worked the best for me. It shows you understand his grief, without saying a word.
2007-02-07 13:07:58 · answer #6 · answered by Gianna M 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
specifically circumstances the final element to do is only take a seat with a guy or woman and cry with them... enable them to assert something they opt to assert -- no remember how frightening or gruesome -- do not tell him you be attentive to how he feels -- no person does... only tell him you would be unable to think of how difficult it is, yet you would be with him by it. permit him be on my own if he ought to be, yet be with him if he needs you there. An elderly guy lost his spouse, and a small infant climbed onto his lap and sat there quietly. while asked what she grew to become into doing, the newborn stated, "i'm helping him sense undesirable." as quickly as I artwork with a grieving guy or woman, I call it sitting throwing ashes on our heads... we don't definitely have ashes to toss, however the image facilitates me remember what grieving is approximately... that's approximately feeling the soreness of the loss, till we are carried out.
2016-09-28 14:04:47 · answer #7 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
omg! thats so sad... i don't know... just tell him that its ok and tell him all the good times that he had with him and then say that ant had a good life and it was time for him to go and that he'll get a new friend pretty soon but it is never going to take place of ant.. but his new friend will at least fill his heart a little bit... i'm so sorry about that!
2007-02-07 13:00:08 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think just be there for him - even if you both are silent. He will know you care and are there. Depression fogs the mind and with his grieving it is doubly hard for him. Do special things for him i.e. bring him his favorite food or drink etc. He will know you are trying to be there for him.
2007-02-07 16:59:15 · answer #9 · answered by Ladyhawk 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think you can help him get over it. Just be there for him. Be his shoulder to cry on. Let him go through the grieving process.
Believe me, he will appreciate just having someone who cares that he is so upset and is willing to be there for him through all this.
2007-02-07 12:58:53 · answer #10 · answered by ♫ Insane_Princess ♪ 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋