Would I lose her as a friend if I told her how I felt, while she is seeing someone?

Question

I have a friend that I have more than just "friend" feelings for. We only started talking to each other about 10 months ago, and didn't start becoming good friends until recently. We spend a lot of time together, but she started seeing someone before I had the chance to tell her how I felt.

Our friends say that she knows that I "like" her, she just doesn't realize to what extent. We (friends and her and her bf) go out and she spends a lot of time looking at me when her bf is not paying attention to her. (He's only out for sex anyways.)

I feel as if I need to talk to her and let her know how I feel. It truely is affecting me. But she seems quite content with her current situation, and I don't want to lose her as a great friend.

Should I tell her? And if so, how do I approch the situation?

Please help. Thanks!
www.myspace.com/cwmorgan

Answer 1

Oh you poor thing, I'm in almost the same situation. =(

In the end, you must listen to what your heart tells you. If you really feel like you should tell her, go for it! Just don't expect her to drop her relationship for you. Explain to her that you have feelings for her but that more than anything you value her friendship and wish to keep it. As long as you don't push her, there is no reason why you two can't keep on being great friends. Even if there is a bit of awkwardness afterward, it is very easily dispelled.

If you are not willing to risk it yet, just hang in there my friend. Be a good friend and always be there for her, like you always have been. She will never forget it and when this relationship ends (it will sooner than later, if the guy is only out for sex), she will come back to you. For sure.

Concentrate on being the best man you can be for her, no matter which path you choose. Everything will work out in the end, I guarantee. =)

Answer 2

wheww.. she spends a lot of time looking at you when her bf is not paying attention? two things might be in her mind while she's looking at you:

.) she feels awkward and sorry for herself thinking that you & her friends consider her no more than a sex hole in her current fling.

2.) while looking at you, she might say in her mind, "oh! poor guy! if only your not a petrified-coward-slooth then it would be you now sitting here beside me.

what can i suggest:
things can never be too late, youre late but i think you can still have that one last shoot, because you're a bit late you should risk something, to the extent that you might be losing her. here's two idea:

1.) if you want her not just because she's hot, then say what you truly feel, it should come from the heart, maybe when you two are alone, kiss her & tell her what you feel & that she means to you, the key is, find the right time & place, it should seem romantic not lusty. the result of that kiss would be feast or famine. risk or fell sorry forever.

2.) if you're just jealous because someone is f#ck#ng her now instead you, if you have a great obssession on her, wait for the timing again, when she feels sad or having arguement w/ her bf, never say bad things bout his bf & exploit the opportunity, show to her your (lusty) care & drunk her, everything will flow naturally & you'll end up in bed w/ her having the hottest s#x of your life. lolz.
goodluck!

Answer 3

I would suggest that you call and plan to meet with her-the two of you-somewhere in a semi-public place-a picnic table at a park, etc., and ask her how things are going with her and her boyfriend. Depending on her answer, you could then proceed to tell her that you have something you want to talk with her about, and yet, you are concerned about still being friends, regardless of how this conversation turns out, after you say what you have to say. Then, let her know how you feel about her. And, that no matter what, you still want to be there for her as a friend (if she says she wants to stay with the guy she is currently with). She may or may not privately after--for sometime maybe--do some comparing between the two of you guys. At least, you will have let her know how you feel. Take care.

Answer 4

it is a bit to late now. if it is only for the sex she will lose interest, and then is the time to tell her all your feelings