that im gay and that I want im not happy who I am and I want to be the opposite gender. I would appreciate answers from parents that experienced this first hand, but anyone is allowed to answer. An any places I can go to get help?? This will be much appreciated. Thanks for the help everyone! :)
p.s. Im a boy and im 16
2007-02-07 07:34:26 · 7 answers · asked by ♥Jesse♥ 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
as a parent i would hope that if one of my children came to me and told me this that i would show them love and support. i wish you the best.
2007-02-07 07:40:14 · answer #1 · answered by Tracie 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm so glad you are asking for the wisdom of a parent to help you! I have three children. None of them are gay or lesbian; however, I think I can still give you some advice because this has to do more with your relationship with your parents.
How is that relationship? Do you respect them? Do they respect you? Before you have "the talk" with them, you should build up your relationship with them first, by not complaining about them to others, by doing what they ask you to do, and by taking a genuine interest in helping maintain the household (cleaning, cooking, feeding the pets, etc.) It's really important that you are as much a part of the family as you can be, even if you don't think they deserve respect and honor - it is still the right thing to do (and they will take notice).
Next step, try to understand your situation as much as possible. Why are you not happy? Are you feeling really isolated from the world? Do you feel as if no one really pays that much attention to you? Maybe there are some needs that are not being met and you feel like if you made these changes, then you would be made "whole".
I'm not here to tell you that your feelings are not real. I'm positive that they are very real. I don't want to turn you off by what I say next; it's just that, even though I don't know you, I believe that what you decide to do with your feelings is extremely important to your well being for the rest of your life. Our feelings can rule our lives if we let them; however, it's so crucial that you gain control over them so that you will not feel like your life is spiraling out of this world, you know?
I have let my feelings control my life and so I know what I'm talking about. But, I've found my sanity again and want to share how I did it with you. Not to get too deep with you, but I believe that we all have some kind of gaps in our lives that need filled, and to be honest, there isn't a single person on Earth that can fill all of our gaps all of the time. The only person that I found that can do that is God's Son, Jesus. He's my best friend. He's always there to comfort me, strenthen me, and protect me. He's also the only one that I can talk with 24/7. God created you and loves you more than you can wrap your brain around! When I felt like nobody really cared about me and like no one understood what I was going through, God knew and He cared. I felt it. I can also pinpoint times in my life when I could've been in grave danger but God protected me and led me to safety (walking around drunk and alone in a strange and bad part of town).
OK, so my last step in this whole situation would be to trust and call on God for strength as you go and tell your parents about your situation, knowing that no matter how they handle it you are doing what God wants you to do. If you approach it in a way that you are asking your parents for them to team up with you on this (maybe they can help you understand why you are not very happy as a boy), then I think they will take the news a little easier.
I hope that this helps you and I will be praying for you over the next several days.
2007-02-07 16:29:45 · answer #2 · answered by Kathy C 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well 1st off you need to find some type of support group. This can really be a shock to a parent. Also, if you are wanting to have a sex change you will have to wait till you are 18. This is a painful experience and making the changes will hurt everyone you know. Research all your options and hope you can find what you are looking for.
2007-02-07 16:13:18 · answer #3 · answered by luvthbaby2 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I told my mother while sitting in a parked car. I chose that because she couldn't get away, and neither could I. It was hard enough to tell her that I am gay. I can't imagine how difficult it will be to tell your parents that you are considering gender reassignment. That is why I suggest talking to other kids and adults who have been through this. I don't know where you are located, but in Connecticut there is a group called True Colors that could help. You may consider contacting them to see if they can help you locate a similar organization in your area. http://www.ourtruecolors.org/
Good luck, and I hope all goes well for you!
2007-02-07 16:29:45 · answer #4 · answered by millieg 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say just to sit you parents down and tell them. THey are your parents they should understand.. If not i am always here tp talk top.. i had to go through the same thing.. i am a girl at the age of 16
2007-02-07 16:15:18 · answer #5 · answered by RoOrOo!!! 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you need to just sit down with them and tell them. i know if my children had to go through this they would have my support 100% they may be shocked at first but they will always be there for you. also talk to your doctor and see if there is anything they can do to help you. you may have to wait a little longer to go through a gender change if that is want you want. it will work out in the end for you. if you want or need some one to talk to you can add me to msn messenger my address is puppyluv408@hotmail.com.
2007-02-07 15:57:05 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
The calm direct approach is best and if talking to one parent at a time is easiest than do that
2007-02-07 15:59:45 · answer #7 · answered by cherry 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋