Make me ROTFLAO, and I'll give you best answer.?

Question

Have fun finding ways to make me laugh. It won't be easy, though.

Answer 1

I am your Doctor. sorry to inform you that you have a brain problem.
Your brain is in 2 parts... Left and right. The left part has nothing right in it, and the right has nothing left in it"

LOL!

Answer 2

one fine day an angel was flying over the city park, in the park was a statue of a man and a woman locked in a tender embrace
the angel flew down and touched them, giving them life. Now the angel said, is there any thing you'd like to do?The man looked at the woman, the woman looked back longingly at the man, they both ran of into the bushes, where a tremendous commotion took place, after a couple of minutes they poped back out. the angel said my that was fast isn't there more you'd like to do?
Yes said the man statue, this time she will hold the pigeon and I'll
Get Even!

Answer 3

Subject: FW: The Bag Lady





A little old lady is walking down the street, dragging
two plastic garbage bags with her, one in each
hand. There's a hole in one of the bags, and every
once in a while a $20 bill is flying out of it onto the
pavement.

Noticing this, a policeman stops her...."Ma'am,
there are $20 bills falling out of that bag..."

"Damn!" says the little old lady....."I'd better go back
and see if I can still find some. Thanks for the warning!"

"Well, now, not so fast," says the cop. "How did you
get all that money? Did you steal it?"

"Oh, no," says the little old lady. "You see, my back
yard backs up to the parking lot of the football stadium.
Each time there's a game, a lot of fans come and pee
in the bushes, right into my flower beds!"

"So, I go and stand behind the bushes with a big
hedge clipper, and each time someone sticks his
little thingie through the bushes, I say: $20 or off it
comes!"

"Hey, not a bad idea!" laughs the cop. "OK, good
luck! By the way, what's in the other bag?"

"Well," says the little old lady, "not all of them pay."

Answer 4

Why did Raggedy Ann get thrown out of the toybox?


Because she kept on sitting on Pinochio's face saying,
"Lie to me, Lie to me!"

Answer 5

my 4 year old is just getting into video games and he's a tad "slow"....he plays mario brothers and theres alot of jumping and turning.... this is more of a visual, so work with me here....
When he jumps over things (on screen) he actually jumps... and after 10 minutes, he dropped the controller and looked at me and said "Dad, thats hard work"..
come on, you at least chuckled.

Answer 6

Dipthwang.

Answer 7

How do you make a sweet little 80 year old lady say "SH*T"?
Get another sweet little 80 year old lady to say "Bingo!"

Answer 8

One day a man spotted a lamp by the roadside. He picked it up, rubbed it vigorously, and a genie appeared.

"I'll grant you your fondest wish," the genie said.

The man thought for a moment, then said, "I want a spectacular job. A job that no man has ever succeeded at or has ever even dared try."

"Poof!" said the genie. "You're a housewife."

Answer 9

Little Red Riding Hood was walking through the forest to deliver a picnic basket to her gramma.

Before heading out, her mom tells her, "Little Red Riding Hood, be careful. The Big Bad Wolf is out there and he will pull up your little red dress, pull down your little red panties, and f*ck your little red socks off."

Little Red Riding Hood takes a shotgun out of the closet and puts it next to her and says, "It's ok, I can handle it."

So, Little Red Riding Hood starts out on her journey. First she runs into the Three Bears.

They say, "Little Red Riding Hood, what are you doing out here all alone? Don't you know the Big Bad Wolf is out here and he's gonna pull up your little red dress, pull down your little red panties, and f**k your little red socks off?"

To which Red Riding Hood shows them the shotgun and says, "It's ok, I'm covered."

So, Red Riding Hood continues on, and sees the Three Little Pigs.

They say, "Little Red Riding Hood, what are you doing out here alone? The Big Bad Wolf is out and when he finds you he's gonna pull up your little red dress, pull down your little red panties and f**k your little red socks off."

Red Riding Hood again, pulls out the gun and says "I'll be alright".

So, Red Riding Hood is walking and she sees none other but the Big Bad Wolf.
The Wolf says , "Little Red Riding Hood, I have found you! I'm gonna pull up your little red dress, pull down your little red panties and f**k your little red socks off".

Red Riding Hood pulls up her little red dress, pulls down her little red panties, lays down on the ground, points the gun at the Wolf and says "NO. You're gonna EAT ME like the BOOKS says!"

Answer 10

how do you get some one to where the uglies dress in the world tell that Green dress with yellow dots,blue stripe,black cut up,over flow bars,red bikini marks,and deep blue,red orange,larger sweater looks good on her.