After almost two years he moved in with me and my daughter (they adore each other and did even before we realized we were in love), things were fine and then he had serious issues with his elderly parents and moved in with them to try to get things under control. He then springs on me that he was having problems dealing with things like my daughter's socialization and just dealing with actually being part of a family (he's never really had to love and live with anyone). My friends were his friends as well, but they hate him for hurting us and want me to move on. I simply can't do that. How can I get them to understand that for me that's not the right choice?
2007-02-07 07:27:05 · 8 answers · asked by Danathefly 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
tell them exactly what you just said. A relationship takes two people...and someone will eventually have to show this man how to have a good relationship...so why can't you be the one to show him? We can't always rely on what our friends tell us to do, sometimes we have to make decisions for ourselves...and good friends will stand behind you when you have to do that.
2007-02-07 07:32:23 · answer #1 · answered by Erin D 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a hard situation to be in. Friends almost never understand all the possible complications of relationships. They have their own views and opinions, but remember that they are just trying to look out for you because they care about you. You will move on when you are ready to move on and nothing they can say will push that faster.
2007-02-07 15:31:57 · answer #2 · answered by mfupipoet 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell them that it’s your life and you want to make the decision on who comes and go, express to them that you do appreciate their concerns. Your friends are just looking out for you even if it might seem like they are trying to make a decision for you. For my personal opinion, if a man says that he’s not ready then you should let it be, its better they tell you then you finding out when it’s to late. Just know that your friends is doing what they do out of love
2007-02-07 15:34:32 · answer #3 · answered by T 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell them you appreciate their concern but you have made your choice, but then you have NO RIGHT to complain or whine to your friends about him
As an aside, I say DUMP THE JERK!! You are not the only one being hurt here - your child should be your primary concern no someone with commitment issues - and that's exactly what they are.
2007-02-07 15:33:24 · answer #4 · answered by island3girl 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is ultimately your decision, and you shouldn't have to convince your friends of anything. They will think what they want, anyway.
It's a good idea to listen to their opinions in case you've overlooked something, but their opinions are not always fact.
Go with your heart, and try to keep your personal life personal.
Good luck to you, and I hope this helps. :)
2007-02-07 15:32:36 · answer #5 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you dont need to explain a thing. its your life and you make the decisions. Although, usually friends always have our best interests at heart, maybe you need to take a deeper look and ask yourself why they feel this way, you may get an answer that you were to blind to see.
2007-02-07 15:30:54 · answer #6 · answered by Nikki C 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your story is not that detailed....are you both still together? How did he hurt you guys?
From what I can decipher....it is not meant to be....he has to want to change.
2007-02-07 15:30:41 · answer #7 · answered by ? 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just tell them, if they cant understand what you want than there not your real friends
2007-02-07 15:32:19 · answer #8 · answered by mascot336 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋