My Husband and I have been battling his ex girlfriend which he has two chilldren with for three years now. It seems like every week she seems to pull the rug from under us just when we think we have one up on her. she has never had a job we bought her a home and provide her with $3,000 a month to care for the chilldren, all we want is more coustody. We have no criminal record and have done nothing wrong we live in a great home in a great town we still only have 25%. I would like to know with having joint coustody can the mother take the child out of school without our consent? when we have individual mediation does the mediatior have to inform us of the things they discussed? She requested drug tests to be taken ours came back clean but hers was a high lev of medication pain pills. Our daughter had a severe infection in the mouth I had to take her to the dentist with out her consent to find that out is that neglect on her behalf? Please help us if you have any advice please help!
2007-02-07 07:16:38 · 5 answers · asked by chantel 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
YIKES!!!!!!!!! ok.....the way i understand it...if she is the primary custodian, she can take the child out of school without fathers consent... but why would she( i assume you mean...like to have her homeschooled?)
also, if you took her to the doc and the mom wasnt available for consent....why would that be neglect? wasnt she in your care at the time? the main thing is that the child got proper care.
i have step kids too and i know how things can get....but if any of this has to do with your personal feelings toward the kids mom...try to get past it for the kids sake. it sucks that she is getting so much money from you, but...thats the price you pay when in the situation you chose to be in. trust me...i understand! its not easy....but what helps me SO much is the serenity prayer.
it helps me remember what i can change and what i cant.
peace.
2007-02-07 07:29:05 · answer #1 · answered by dali333 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds to me like you need to get a new Lawyer, most States no longer take just the side of the mother.
With Joint Custody you both share the responsibility of major decisions in your children's lives, she can't for example decide that she is moving out of state and isn't going to tell you. She can't make education descions or health descions with out you both first agreeing on it all.
But he key word here isn't agreeing it is both. I have had joint custody and know alot of people who have also and the one thing you must know before you decide it is what you want, it won't be easy to do.
Joint custody means communication between both parents, it means putting the children first, it means compromise. It is worth it in the end though because despite of the fact that the child still lives in good homes they are happy and adjusted.
So if you arent willing to put feelings aside about the old relationship and hurt feelings toward each other than it won't work. It will turn into constant court battles and more hurt feelings.
2007-02-07 19:52:54 · answer #2 · answered by Marla D 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
since you 2 are well off financially, i would say you should hire a good attorney, and go after her for neglect. yes, she can take the child out of school without your consent just like you can take the child out without her consent. (if you have joint custody) no the mediator does not have to inform you of the things they discuss unless it pertains to a change in the childs upbringing. save all receipts, and medical records. the court is going to look at this and see what is best for the child. i must warn you though, the court usually won't take a child from it's mother unless the child is in danger. but, it's worth a shot.
2007-02-07 16:47:22 · answer #3 · answered by lidakamo 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
she is still mom and you cant as a step mom have any rights its up to dad to deal with mom and for taking the kids out of school she can and you cant she can put a stop to that ... i have to say keep trying but its up to your husband to fight no you in the eyes of the law you have no rights, but he does, she can keep up with her games if he doesn't do anything about i hate to say it but she can do anything because she is mom and your not ... step parents need to know this just because you marry the mom or dad doesn't mean you get rights if that the mom or dad your married to dies the kids go with the other parent and you cant even get visitation rights sorry but its true and its up to your husband to fight the fight....
2007-02-07 15:31:24 · answer #4 · answered by tlcoufan 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Back to family court for ya'll they are the only ones going to sort this out..
2007-02-07 15:22:44 · answer #5 · answered by darchangel_3 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋