Recently My Grandfather died and my Grandmother is an Old School Christian. I was telling her about how I don't believe in God(She asked) and I realized that although I don't believe in God...the idea really seems to help people cope with death. Do you think thats a big reason most people believe? I mean she said she feels better about thinking he is in heaven,rather then he is just dead and in the ground. I mean my grandmother doesn't go forcing it down my throat like some people do.
2007-02-07 02:34:18 · 28 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
You nailed it!
People have a hard time belileving in themselves most of the time and religion is a way to always have someone watching you, a permanent parent if you will.
I have seen drug addicts change there lives, survivours consuled, and victories won all because one believed the "almighty" was on their side. However in reality it is only your way of coming to grips with what lies a head of you.
Mankind has not evolved enough to accept that it is he and he alone that is responsible for the circumstances surrounding him. Nor have we evolved enough to accept that the Universe is chaotic and violent and that we are on our own.
So allow her to beileve whatever helps her through this trying time. If it allows her to get out of bed then it is a good thing.
My condolences.
2007-02-07 02:36:35 · answer #1 · answered by gatewlkr 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
She said that she feels better thinking he's in heaven. That's it right there. It is a coping mechanism, but beneficial? No.
It is not beneficial because denial is not psychologically healthy. It is the deliberate choice to believe something that is not true, in order to avoid accepting reality, and the human brain is not supposed to function that way. When a person dies, he or she ceases to exist. He is not "in the ground", a body is in the ground. There is nobody there. That's a very hard thing to accept, and it doesn't surprise me that people would prefer to believe in an afterlife, but believing it does not make it so.
It takes courage to face death. It takes courage to say goodbye and be unable to take any comfort in a belief that the person will continue to exist elsewhere, or that you will see that person again, but that is the reality of it. When people learn that, and stop fearing death, and accept it as a sad, but perfectly natural end to life, maybe they will begin taking comfort in their memories and appreciating life more.
But she is elderly, and she is grieving. Sounds like she has her head on straight - she said it makes her feel better to believe that, not that it is true. At least she can differentiate between fantasy and reality, and she has been honest with you and respectful of your view. Sounds like a good grandmother - appreciate and love her while you have her.
2007-02-07 10:40:09 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
I think that every culture and collection of ideas on death and dying can help each of us through that process. If you don't believe in an afterlife, you develop a means of living which lends substance to the meaning of your life in the NOW. You know that dying is an end, and you work to make that end count.
The religious tend to work toward having a meaning in the hereafter. Both systems offer something. I don't think that either makes it easier.
I personally believe in reincarnation. Still, that doesn't lessen my responsibilities in this life.
However you look at it, we'll either know that there is an afterlife in the end, or we'll simply be gone. Those that seem to be able to offer proof now are not universally accepted, and however you look at it, it's an act of faith to believe or disbelieve as there is no empirical evidence either way.
Live your life the best you can, and strive to make a difference now because that's all we're absolutely certain of.
2007-02-07 10:42:19 · answer #3 · answered by Deirdre H 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's kind of like saying that a drunken man is happier than a sober man. While that may be true in a sense, drinking doesn't fix what is making you sad, it just lets you escape from it so you don't have to really deal with the emotion. This is basically what religion does. People who fear death, who can't comprehend not existing anymore, need religion so they can go on, like an alchoholic who can't function unless they have some booze in their system.
2007-02-07 10:59:24 · answer #4 · answered by eviltruitt 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It does help people cope with death. But I think that a lot of people force themselves into believing it simply for that reason, so that their loved ones and themselves won't just be "dead and in the ground" as you say; not that your grandma is doing that.
2007-02-07 10:43:20 · answer #5 · answered by yearofthebox 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe religion helps people cope with death but having a relationship with the Lord Jesus Christ has helped me cope with life for the last twenty five years.
2007-02-07 10:39:55 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
religion is a crippling mental block, it leads one to become detached from their lives, from their pain, and the pleasure. it makes some lazy, 'knowing' there is something "watching over them." but, it is a false hope, it is actually hindering their abilities and puttng a damper on their lives.
but, in the situation you describe, a false hope may be just what is needed. the elderly and dying need something to cling to, and religion is a very good straw to grasp for. (though like every straw, it sinks to the bottem with you when you drown.)
so, let her think there is a heaven, let her think not of the decay, the return to the earth though the bowels of worms and maggots. because that is reality, and society has turned that natural process into something to be disgusted with, something to fear, when it is nothing more than the work of God, if he does exist.
2007-02-07 10:41:45 · answer #7 · answered by sobrien 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Yes it can help. I just don't think it is a realistic approach to things.
I see two main reasons that I think the religious are religious.
1- Saying god did it answers everything and keeps you from having to go through the hard work of figuring it out or understanding the complex reasons.
2- You don't really have to die that way.
2007-02-07 10:40:13 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
It helps extreme insecure people, but I think accepting that morality is a part of life is a stronger and healthier perspective. I do understand where you are coming from that it is healthy for a weaker part of the population that need to establish meaning in their life. Even the stronger or so called insensitive have this problem.
2007-02-07 10:38:50 · answer #9 · answered by Casey 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, I think people would rather believe in the fairy tale than face the reality that when you die, it's over and there is no more. There is no "better place" where your loved ones go. The memory of your grandfather must and can live on through those who loved him sharing and remembering his life.
I'm sorry for your loss.
2007-02-07 10:39:16 · answer #10 · answered by glitterkittyy 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋