Does he have a drinking problem?

Question

My husband drinks a six pack/day on weeknights and a case shared between Sat & Sun. He sees nothing wrong with this, he grew up in this environment. I however do not think it's healthy for our children to grow up this way. He doesn't have agressive behavior from drinking and it rarely affects his involvement in commitments , so it's just a matter of health. Am I worried about nothing? Is the amount he is consuming not considered to be excessive? I do socially drink every so often, so I don't have a problem with alcohol, just the amount and the frequency in which he consumes it. Should I back-off?

Answer 1

Yes, if it is affecting the family, it IS a problem.

If my husband drinks more than 4 drinks a WEEK, I get on his back.

My mother was in her final stages of alcoholism when she was diagnosed with cancer. She started drinking heavily when she was in her 30s and it got worse and worse (to 3 bottles of scotch per day) until she was permanently brain damaged and had seizures in her 60s.

Alcohol causes a person, without their knowlege, to build up a resistance to its effects. What got him drunk 5 years ago, no longer gets him drunk, and he has to keep drinking more to get the same effect.

In my mother's case, it got to the point where her tolerance was built up so high, that she would have a seizure if she had less than her normal 3 bottles of scotch per day.

Now that I know what alcoholism does to a family (chaos....not knowing how the person will be from one minute to another...), I am resolved, and have told my husband that if he starts drinking more than a few drinks a week, we will divorce.

Remember this:
Man takes Drink,
Drink takes Drink,
Drink takes Man.

Words to live by. Alcohol can get hold of you husband and not let him go until it has ruined your entire family.

Answer 2

Does he binge drink at all? Does his behavior change when he drinks? Is he taking money that should be spent on his family and using it for beer?

If he's just drinking beer every night, maybe he just likes beer. There's millions of people out there spending their money and time on cigarette smoking and that's not seen as a serious problem by society.....even though cigarettes are way more harmful to the body than 6 beers a day.

Maybe if you're concerned about his health, motivate him to be more active and go to the gym or something, to balance out the negative effects of the beer. Then you can both win!

If he smokes, well, I can't help you there! LOL

Answer 3

Sounds to me like he had a drinking problem. A six pack a day is a lot. Clearly he feels the need to get drunk. As he likely is getting that way. I'm a college student and don't know anybody who drinks that much and college students usually drink a lot!
If he was just having a beer a night that'd be one thing, but it sounds like he has a drinking problem and you are right to be concerned.

Check out the website for Alcoholics Anonymous http://www.alcoholics-anonymous.org/ Hope you can get him help!

Answer 4

I normaly don't agree with people when they say there love ones have a drinking problem because they drink a beer a day ...But in your case you say he drinks a six pack on weeknights..Yea he does have a problem..Try to talk to him and have him go to AA or any other help he can get..I understand your kids come first no matter what so if he doesn't stop this you might want to leave him till he can handle his drinking.

Answer 5

If he is a good provider and otherwise a good dad leave it alone. It is the lay about slobs who beat their family's and starve them for the booze that have the problem. All kinds of people are going to chime in that yes this is a problem but if it isn't hurting anyone and he doesn't drink and drive it is up to hime to decide. You can't tell him he drinks too much especially if it is a lifetime habit. You knew this when you married him. You can encourage him to have a physical with blood work to determine liver function and see what a Dr would advise him but don't nag that is more damaging to the family than the drinking.

Answer 6

I don't think he has a drinking problem. A six pack a day is irrelevant since the more you drink the more it takes you to get drunk. He could be relatively sober in taking 6 beers. Also if it is not affecting his commitments then what's the big deal. The only downside I see here is with his liver. But if he's well insured who cares.

Answer 7

To everyone that answered that it is OK to drink six beers a night must be alcoholic to enjoy lots to drink because it is NOT OK to drink that amount every night, every week, all the time that is not the environment that children should be growing up in.

Answer 8

Ok this is not an easy question so I will have to be blunt. As long as he is home, drinking and not in a bar somewhere else it is ok for now. Now over time, it can effect his health (liver) But, drinking in public with other men (Single) can lead to someone talking to your husband and he making a bad decision. Men do stupid things but alcohol and drugs make is alot worse.

If he really cares about what you are feeling, he will cut back..

Answer 9

As my feet slap down against the cold wet pavement, and my face drips rain from the storm, an unrelenting need to drink pushes me further. Exact final destination appears unknown , but it's inevitable that the evil inside will again return me to the source of my nightmare. No control, no will of my own, no power had I found that might evict this hell that had infected my body and mind. Self-identity, and all that was once me, had been buried under countless layers of drunkenness, so deep, that any calls for help were merely an echo inside my head.
This living liquid curse, cunning and without conscience, had been absorbed into a body which at one time eagerly welcomed it's unyielding influence. But now, as the onslaught of alcohol turned viciously against the world around me, it was only I being held responsible for it's drunken destruction carried out during my imprisonment.
Those intense fear ridden mornings, when I awoke to find yet another nightmare of alcohol's creation, devilishly constructed from it's own personality the night before. Whether it was the sight of dried blood crusted over both hands, or the unfamiliar surroundings of a place where I shouldn't have been, alcohol knew how to render me frozen with crippling insecurity. Too frightened to reason out a healthy answer as to what was happening to me, a deliberate terror of conscience always reached out and tightly gripped my soul. This devil, disguised and hidden behind my own recently drunken face, knew exactly where I'd run to for help. This was much more then an accident through drink. Alcohol's intent was to survive at all costs, to live and breath it's own existence using me as it's host of choice.
But, now, unaware of this developing transformation, all I wanted to do was calm the terror inside my head. There would be only one place, one exit, one chance to escape into a feeling of normality. Alcohol left nothing to chance, and as it waited patiently for me to return a bottle to my lips, I could almost hear a deep sullen laughter quicken my mobility. I desperately needed to lock myself away into the only security I knew, and to experience that precious freedom, I once again had to ingest my enslaver.
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Answer 10

Well I will say this, it isnt so much always quanitity it is the consistency and habituality, dont put it on the # of beer that he drinks put it on the fact that he is fine with drinking large quanities and it wont get smaller, A case turns into 2, then maybe liquor, then maybe next drink of choice, which you can determine that I think you have. I think you have answered your own qustion here.

As far as an option for you, you do whats good for your kids, our children reflect their parents by socialization your socializing children to believe that drinking is okay, plz hear me out, not all maybe true here but im trying.

Your children and you deserve more, whether or not he drinks in a bar or at home, what if kills a family, just like yours, what do you? what if a ride to the party store results in vehicular homicide this isnt abnormal, this is truth, this is life, even the most innocent protrayl of drinking leads to death and disease, you know most of our stats for devaince and crime starts with alchahol consumption, NOT YOUR HUSBAND, Your kids, boredom or initially defying your husband and you becuase you dont lead by exmaple, My answer may suck but it is the truth, you can either tell your husband and find strength to give him and ultimatum or you can accept this, keep your mouth shut and proceed with life, its on you, Dont sit and justify it with oh he doesnt allow to affect certain things guess what functioning alchaholics have no problem with tolerance and function, how to drive a car, do all these things you speak of but guess what one bad decision will ruin your life, youre alreadymaking that decision for you and your children so maybe you shouldnt speak of it on here, this isnt sugar coated for me, you understand whats taking place, if I stayed with my childs father I would be submitting my son to a dysfunctional life with a heroine addict funny thing is, my child are happy, God Blessed us cause we left,

PS MY SPELL CHECK ISNT WORKING SORRY FOR ERRORS