I'm making not even half of what I used to and I do nothing but go to work and do housework. I really love my boyfriend, but he hasn't been that emotionally supportive. Not to mention, I've become a jealous person since I've been here, and I just don't feel like I'm worth anything anymore. Not to mention, my bf's ex is a runner up in a statewide pageant! How do I deal with getting out of this mental slump while keeping with my daily routine of going to work and staying at home, since I really don't have much time/money for much of anything?
2007-02-07 01:55:28 · 4 answers · asked by HappilyEverAfter 4 in Health ➔ Mental Health
I know this sounds like the typical, but I really want our relationship to work and I really can't think of myself without him. He's the one I see myself being with, but I feel that this slump is just tearing me apart.
2007-02-07 02:06:59 · update #1
Hey girl, I'm about to make a big move for the guy I love too.
congrats for taking that step though.
Have you thought about working out? Maybe getting outside and going jogging when you start to feel down, or start getting those nagging thoughts about your boyfriend's ex? Exercise will make you feel better. The endorphins released when you get your body moving are gonna help you not feel as depressed and you'll probably be more confident when your body starts looking different (unless of course you're already a gym rat). Oh, and being outside might help your mood too.
I find that being stuck inside is the absolute worst thing I can do for myself when I'm depressed. All I end up doing is moping around and sleeping all day.
Do you have a dog? You could always take your dog for a walk, or even better, find a local dog park and go hang out there for awhile. You'll meet tons of people that way.
And keep in mind, pageant winner or not, the ex is an EX. And she's that for a reason. Be proud, cause there is obviously something you have that she doesn't, and your boyfriend recognizes it. Thats why he's with YOU and not with HER.
And I wouldn't rely too much on the boyfriend for emotional support through all this. I know you probably made the move to be with him, but you've got to live for yourself. Make yourself happy each day with or without him. Do things you like to do when he's not around and relish in that alone time. Sure, pay attention to him and be a good girlfriend, but you've gotta be good to yourself first. Your relationship will grow once you're in a place (mentally) where you're happy.
Am i still talking? sheesh!
Good luck hun.
2007-02-07 02:08:05 · answer #1 · answered by Steph 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow. This is a hard one. Sounds like you have a lot going on.
To start with: it sounds a bit like you are home sick. It is important that you set aside some time to call your old friends/family back in Louisiana. Since your boyfriend isn't being supportive, now is the time you need to fall back on the support network you had back home.
Next thing: earning a fraction of your old salary. That just sucks. Plain and simple. I'm surprised to hear that because usually the east and west coasts demand higher salaries than the south because of the cost of living is so much more. But then again, I don't know what you do. I can suggest, maybe, instead of housework, when you get home, put your resume on Careerbuilder.com and start looking for another job closer to the salary you used to earn.
I know what it's like to be stuck in a work rut and it's depressing. You go to work, come home, go to bed, then go to work again. Its like your only living to work. When that happened to me, a friend suggested getting involved with the community on the weekend: volunteer on a political campaign (trust me - if you even if you aren't into politics it can be very exciting, and you meet all sorts of cool people) join a gardening group or get involved with your church/temple. It costs nothing and it's very social.
So, #1.) Call your friends back in Louisiana 2.)start looking for another job and 3.) get involved in a local free activity.
Hope that helps you out. Good luck!
2007-02-07 02:20:07 · answer #2 · answered by f w 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
that sucks, ive been to LA many times. why do you have to see his ex anyway? i dunno, i just moved from SD too, but not there and i moved on my own.. to the other coast. i dont see you adapting to that area if he's not gonna be extra supportive,,, save your $$$.
2007-02-07 03:10:43 · answer #3 · answered by nodumgys 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dump him there and move back to the real world sd,ca.yea
2007-02-07 02:03:41 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋