I'd had a pretty bad week and I went out with a friend to meet her in town one night, but she was barely responding to text messages and not answering her phone, it eventually took me an hour and a half to figure out where she was and get there. Just as I was going in she turned up at the door holding hands with some guy, says a quick few words, then disappears into the club, him with his arm around her. My mate actually said to me "I thought you guys were going out" to which I replied "me too!".
Once inside it took her about ten minutes to actually come and talk to me, by which point I was feeling pretty neglected. She started getting worked up wondering why I seemed angry at her but by this point I'd had enough and left.
I tried to talk to her the next day about it but she keeps reacting angrily or defensively even though I'm not accusing her of anything, I just want her to understand why I was upset. Now she's not talking at all. Any ideas what I should do with her?
2007-02-07
01:30:00
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30 answers
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asked by
santahul
2
in
Family & Relationships
➔ Singles & Dating
I should add, I sincerely doubt that she was cheating. Everybody who knows her (i.e. longer than I have) says she's very honest, and so far they seem right. She was also out with her mum, who I happen to be very good friends with, so she could never get away with anything anyway. Oh and she says she's known this guy for two years.
What bothers me is that she can't see why it would upset me. Is that just a combination of insensitivity and stupidity or what?
2007-02-07
01:40:43 ·
update #1
someone could be telling tales on you to her she should at least give you a reason for her behaviour if you get no response your better off without her sorry but good luck
2007-02-07 01:35:32
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answer #1
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answered by fergie 11 4
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Hi there, your current girlfriend may just or would possibly not have a point. Keep in mind this: how would you feel in case your present female friend was once spending some time with an ex boyfriend? Even if you possibly can feel it is okay she does now not, and part of loving a man or woman is considering the fact that what makes them feel uncomfortable and doing the opposite. Altering and doing matters that another man or woman likes does now not necessarily imply that you are altering who you're; it just manner that you're taking an additional individuals emotions, likes, or dislikes into consideration. (on the whole when in a relationship equivalent to this, this is the case) My advice: restrict your contact with your ex girlfriend. Your ex female friend is in your past and your current lady friend is your gift. Am not announcing or suggesting you will have to disregard your ex female friend altogether however your ex should be treated the identical method you could possibly deal with one more man buddy. (it must strictly just be friendship from afar; given the history you guys have with one one more.) Hope things determine, and i hope this recommendation helped.
2016-08-10 15:21:50
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answer #2
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answered by spies 4
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Why are you letting her make a fool of you?!
She took an hour and a half to let you know where she was and then when you did see her she was holding hands with another man? Hello - how obvious is it that she was too "busy" with him to bother with you????!!!!!!
I am so shocked you are acting so dumb.
She has humiliated you and you are giving her the time of day?
You should be thinking of dumping her not trying to get it through her extremely thick skull that you are upset.
2007-02-07 01:39:44
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answer #3
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answered by ? 5
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If you guys were dating exclusively then she shouldn't have been holding hands with another guy and blowing you off. Sounds like she is playing games with your head and disregarding any concern for your feelings. If you feel strongly about her then you should try to understand her absurd behavior. On the other hand, you should really question whether she is worth your time and trouble. There are lots of fish in sea. Find one who will appreciate you.
2007-02-07 01:40:06
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answer #4
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answered by aubrie27 2
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Well she was holding another mans hand and he had his arm around her. Seams like she's with this other man as well as you. If she won't listen to you properly as to why your upset, write a letter explaining it to her. You can't say anything wrong then in the heat of it all. My boyfriend doesn't listen to me when he thinks I'm having a go. If I give him a letter he understands what I mean then. I don't go really long and drawn out I just say 'Seeing as you won't listen to me, I'm going to write it to you'. She seams like she's messing you around and I'd rather get a gf who didn't confuse me! Who's this other man too, he may be a really good friend. Plus give her the run around, when she calls you don't pick up, cos she sounds like a b*tch. Walk infront of her holding another girls hand and ignore her. I doubt she'd like that.
2007-02-07 01:36:23
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answer #5
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answered by Anonymous
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I don't know what you think constitiutes cheating, but if I saw my other half holding hands with someone else, that's exactly what I would be accusing him of doing.
You sound like a decent sort, she sounds like she's (at best) not totally committed to the relationship, so sorry, I'd end it now.
2007-02-07 01:59:47
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answer #6
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answered by chip2001 7
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so sad she is this insensitive to your feelings
what you have to do is to ignore her as much as you can
if possible,show up at the club with another girl,not necessarily another girlfriend,but just a cute girl and make your girlfriend see you.
if she has been cheating on you,she wont be so jealous or hurt,but if she comes crying or ranting,tell her you paid her back in her own coin,
if she apologizes and assures you that she was not having some fling,you apologize too and get back with her if that's what you want.
try this out.
it works.
2007-02-07 02:43:53
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answer #7
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answered by lace 2
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Listen, why do you want to explain to her why you were upset, is she thick or something. Anyways, forget her, if she is acting angrily and very defensive is because she knows she did wrong, and doesn't want to face the truth, so don't bother, let her come to you when she is calm, let her feel regret, believe me she will come. Good luck
2007-02-07 01:37:22
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answer #8
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answered by Ruksana P 4
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Hey, Sorry to hear that... my opinion would be to try to talk through it and see if she has got a good reason, you might be thinking wrong what you had seen.
Once you asked and her explanation doesn't make any sense, dump her straight away. Cheating is not tolerated in any relationship.
2007-02-07 01:37:13
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answer #9
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answered by Sib 2
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It sounds like the decision has been made for u she went off with someone else let her go. Time to move on and find someone who wants to be with you.
2007-02-07 01:38:28
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answer #10
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answered by bcs31859 2
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