If you went to speak to your girlfriends father and your parents to tell them you were going to propose then went to talk to your pastor and a close male friend to let them know, but the close male friend said wait six months or more because you weren't confident enough, you were both insecure, he wants to be wanted and she has an obsessive nature: would you still propose? Because an engagement isn't a marriage, just a promise that you'll be married and you've given your heart to that person and devoted your life to that person?? Or would you wait until you've seen some change to get engaged?
2007-02-06 21:29:27 · 10 answers · asked by Mrs Stevo 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
I guess what i mean is, would anybody change your mind about proposing to the girl you love and want to spend the rest of your life with??
2007-02-06 21:30:15 · update #1
We've been dating two and a bit years...
2007-02-06 21:33:40 · update #2
If I was sure of my feelings for her, and hers for me, then no-one would change my mind.
I would listen to other's points of view, but then attempt to make them understand the depth of our feelings and our belief that getting married was right.
Incidentally; been there - listened to the advice - married her anyway - still together and very much in love 8 years later :o)
2007-02-07 00:44:17 · answer #1 · answered by Pete J 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
can you rephrase the question please. I now have a headache trying to decipher. I will come back in a short while tho. promise!!lol
x
ok u been dating for 2.5 years. that should be long enough.
u should have a pretty good idea of whether the parents are in agreement with ur relationship.
u should discuss with ur parents how they would feel about it rather than springing a surprise on them and face the possibility of a negative response. ur right an engagement is not formally tying the knot. what concerns me is that u r looking for change. If it is a marriage of convenience then these very rarely work.
If however, u r in love with each other and it is what u both want then u should take the bull by the horns and just do it!!!
Regardless of anyone's opinion unless u r hopelessly young.
I would listen to the pastor.
If he is a decent man he should be able to give u the answer u seek but he should say u need to look into each other's hearts to find it.
If the answer is the right one then i wish u every success and happiness together.
2007-02-07 05:34:06 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well, I am not Christian and I usually don't answer to "Christian only" questions, but this one is just too tempting. My imput is that I would reconsider what I'm doing. A close friend probably knows me better than many people do, and he can be an unbiased observer that sees things even I don't see. Sure the engagement is not a wedding, but should I invest in a ring if I'm possibly not getting married? Should I take a girl to the next step only to break her heart later on? I think you can guess my answer is no to both questions. My advice is to be patient. If things are meant to happen, they will happen. Good luck.
2007-02-07 06:00:58 · answer #3 · answered by Alucard 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry if you are asking Christian men only - I am a Christian woman. A year ago I met the man of my dreams, but there are a few issues, such as differing Christian beliefs and his behaviour when we argue. These 2 things HAVE to change before we even think of marriage, and we both agree.
Remember my friend, it is good to take a step back and view the relationship in realistically. I would NOT want to spend the rest of my life with this man I love now if he did not change in those areas. Thats realistic.
Remember, this person is the person you will spend the rest of your life with. You cannot go into marriage with the hope that the person will change.
There is no hurry!
2007-02-07 05:36:38 · answer #4 · answered by ccc4jesus 4 · 4⤊ 0⤋
my dear I can empathise with your position. The best friend of your bf is advising him to go slow, in order to be sure of marriage for the both you. He is right and you should be thankful that your bf has a best friend like that, that will look out for him. It's not that he wants him to change his mind, he's just looking out for him, that's what best friends do. Six months is good advice, and i tell you one thing for sure if you go against the advice of his best friend , you bf will be set to dump you. Because the opinion of his best pal will override you until you marry, fact of life.
Marriage is a life long commitment, if you can't wait six months for a decision , then don't bother wanting to marry.
2007-02-07 05:46:21 · answer #5 · answered by kate d 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
From personal experience and from Bible teaching I would say if there is any caution whatsoever, wait and reevaluate until you are absolutely sure. The world always has the option of divorce, but Christians do not.
2007-02-07 05:44:37 · answer #6 · answered by oldguy63 7 · 3⤊ 1⤋
I would personally wait a while,if you want to spend your life with her a couple of months should be ok to wait to see if its feasible
2007-02-07 05:31:43 · answer #7 · answered by Miss M 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
no...i wouldn't, but being engaged will mean everybody around you pressuring the two of you WHEN IS THE W-DAY? It could be too much to handle.
2007-02-07 05:34:48 · answer #8 · answered by Mickey22_jp 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Yeah 'cos they get half of all your money & everything if you ever get divorced in the future.
2007-02-07 05:32:26 · answer #9 · answered by garlicjnr2001 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
2 and a half years? You either know or you don't, by know.
2007-02-07 05:36:01 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋