So I've been dating this guy for almost three years now. We care very much for each other but I know he's not the one for me. He's 12 years older than me and he already has kids that he does not live with. I recently found out that I'm pregnant with his kid and I don't know what to do for a few reasons.
He's moving to AZ and has asked me to go with him but I don't want to. I have a good job here, not to mention this is the second time I've faced this. Against my better judgment I decided not to carry the child because he didn't think it was a good time and wanted to wait. I regretted this decision because II know I could have made it work by myself. I vowed I would go it alone next time if I had to.
The other thing is that there is someone else that I've loved for years and I do think he's the one. I was hoping to rekindle a relationship with him. I know that this other guy loves me but I'm worried that he won't want me if I have another man's child.
What should I do?
2007-02-06 14:05:53 · 18 answers · asked by Ms. CityKitty 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Girl, the thing is sometimes we are so afraid that nobody will like us or love us... sometimes we love to feel loved. but if you feel that he is really not the one for you... then drop him. I tell you this, if a man really love the girl there's no "bad time" to carry his child. its always a good time. if you wont let go of the relationship how will you move on to the new one? let him go. you deserve better.
and if this other guy really, as in REALLY loves you, it does'nt matter if you have 12 kids from 12 different men. LOVE sees beyond that you know. its not superficial. you know what you want. dont be afraid to get it. if it doesnt turn out right... yes, youll be heartbroken but atleast you know that he's a jerk and youll ask yourself why the hell did you love this guy? If it does.... good for you. you end up with the one you truly love.
good luck!
2007-02-06 14:55:26 · answer #1 · answered by Pensive heart 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok... first of all are you still pregnant?? If so, why in the hell would you even consider killing an innocent child over a man??? come on seriously??? and you said the other guy that you love still loves you and you really want him, well the truth to the matter is that if he does still love you, then it will not matter to him if your carrying another man's baby, and it's not just the other man's baby, it's YOUR BABY.. I really hate when women talk about killing innocent babies over these men... I think you need to do what you feel is right, but to be honest clearly, killing an innocent baby is not right.. but if you don't wanna be with the guy then tell him, my husband is 10 years older than me.. he also has 2 older kids from a previous relationship, but we been together for 13 years and have 5 kids together... it can work, age really don't mean anything, but everybody is different.. but i wish you the best in your decision and hope you make the best one... good luck
2007-02-06 14:19:03 · answer #2 · answered by mmarie1221 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I would not stay with the father just because of the situation. If you know he's not the one, go your own way. If the other guy loves you, he won't be put off just because you have another man's child. I met my fiance with a 4 month old, and he didn't mind at all. If you do go through with your pregnacy, and he doesn't seem ok with it, then still go your own way... Trust me, I was in the exact same position.. someone ( the right one) will come along child or no child, and you could miss the opportunity by settling for one you know isn't the one. Good luck!!!!
2007-02-06 14:15:09 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well she should say these words to him "statatory rape of a underage minor is about I think 15 yrs" If he doesn't run away from that faster than a roadrunner, he's a complete idiot and needs to have his sorry *** turned into the cops. Honestly, for her safety she should talk to her parents about this or show the police these texts and have him arrested before he DOES hurt a innocent girl. Not trying to be a stick in the mud about this but just a older wiser chick who has been there done that so to say. Best advice, leave him alone!!!!
2016-03-29 08:47:56 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't stay with a guy unless you want to be with that guy, kid or no kid. How could you let him make a decision like that for you? Also, the other guy that you think is the one?, if he is "The One", it won't matter if you are having someone else's baby, I got with my guy when I was pregnant with someone else's baby and he's great, and that was 7 years ago this Valentine's Day!!! and he treats my children from a previous relationship the same as he treats the one we have together.
2007-02-06 14:13:43 · answer #5 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You seem like you're pretty independent.I myself am a single mother of 2. and i get by. Why are you worried about what another person is going to think.. If you want to have this baby do it.. If that other guy really loves you, he'll accept your baby.. dont do sumthing you'll regret later. As for the father of your baby i dont know what to tell you.. Good Luck.
2007-02-06 14:16:10 · answer #6 · answered by shae&cynsmommie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
seems like you have trouble making decisions which at times we all do. But you gotta make up your mind girl! don't play around with feelings and babies. Forget babies now and concentrate on finding the Right person. Children are wonderful but parents who have them will complicate things.
Make a decision now! REKINDLE THAT RELATIONSHIP GO FOR LOVE AND DUMP THAT AZ GUY.
2007-02-06 14:13:39 · answer #7 · answered by Mr. love 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he don't love you cause of a child then he is not worth being with, If he is such a great man then he will love you and the baby! If your heart belongs to someone else, then go get him, stop wasting your life, go be happy!
2007-02-06 14:11:22 · answer #8 · answered by pippy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, if you don't realize this, his child is also your child. It would be like gettinga divorce, except you were never married, so you woud have every right to have another mans child,and still have a guy. If you don't feel like he is the "one", then you need to let him go. Don't be rude, just be honest.
2007-02-06 14:14:37 · answer #9 · answered by peace ♥ music 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you sound like you already know you want to break things off with this guy.so do it. as for having his baby its up to you. do you want a child? and don't say not with him. its a baby you will raise its yours. do you want to be a mommy? if no you know what to do about that.as for the other guy if he is the"one" he won't care that your pregnant by someone else he'll only care that you are available and interested.
2007-02-06 14:12:54 · answer #10 · answered by LostInReality 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋