Is this an example of manipulation by husband?

Question

Happily married 16 yrs to a great guy but when we fight which is RARE he will scream,yell,slam doors and hit walls BUT has never hit me and says he never would.Sometimes when we fight he will throw something of his and if it breaks he will say "Thanks a lot i liked that to" Its like he is blaming me for something he did.

Answer 1

What a dumbass. Him I mean. Look, the guy needs to learn how to handle his anger. What makes you think that if he breaks things and blames you, that he might not lose it and put his hands on you? Anyone that is hitting things and damaging stuff in anger needs help.

Answer 2

Yes. My parents had the same problem with my parents when I was younger. My dad didn't throw things but he slammed his hand on things and sometimes cut his hand sorta. Not trying to scare you, lol. What my mom did was move into an apartment and get away for awhile. That only made matters worse, though. Mom suggested therapy. A good Therapist will help. It usually costs 50-100 dollars. I would try therapy. It helped and now they get along greatly and when they have disagreements, they go in their room (or somewhere quiet) and discuss it calmly. "Agree to disagree." Is what they said if they still don't change opinion. Hope this helps a lot!!

God bless!!

Answer 3

Fool me once shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me. Seriously, after getting burned the first time you should have known better. She seems like a real take control type and you're a little bit too passive. Its despicable that your husband doesn't ever question what his mother has done, but then again you need to start setting boundaries and stop extending yourself to her knowing how she is. If I were you, I would get her alone and have a woman to woman talk. Let her know how the things she has done have bothered you, and tell her that it is your desire to get along and have a good relationship with her but you will no longer put up with her bullshit. If it doesn't change or get better, I would limit contact with her and only show up for special occasions. Don't prohibit the children from seeing her, and certainly don't tell your husband he can't visit with her, but you may need to remove yourself if she refuses to change. Also, have your husband and kids see her at her home, not yours. I wish you the best.

Answer 4

Well, you didn't say that he manipulated you into doing anything, but it looks as though he could really use some Anger Management Classes.

Be careful--one time when he throws something, it could hit you. You might want to talk to him (on a good day) about getting into marriage counseling or anger management classes.

Answer 5

When your hubby gets mad he doesn't know what he is doing. Dat is why he starts throwing stuff. This can be potentially serious. Coz I can imagine when a man screams, yells and slam doors, throws stuff I can get frightened like crazy! He can be trying to control you by such means.

Answer 6

Better sit down, and relax. Then rethink of your relationship. A clear mind always gets the best solution for any problems. You can also talk to your husband about this (when he's calm), or better yet, talk to a marriage counselor.

Answer 7

Sounds like he acts like a spoiled child who can't face up when he has done something wrong. it's called MANipulation for a reason!

Answer 8

he sounds a lot like my ex, It took me 6 years to get away but if you feel this is emotional abuse, you need to take steps to get out. Just because he doesnt hit you doesnt make his attitude any better.

Answer 9

just sounds like a typical fight. just toss the salt behind your shoulder suck the lemon, and move on. You'll both get over it.

Answer 10

yeah it seems like he tries to guilt trip you into believing that the argument is your fault. I would watch out because he sounds like a firecracker when he is angry.