kid in class with class mate of gay parents?

Question

someone just asked about 3rd graders learning about different type of families (lesbian and gay). for those who are against it, what about the children of these gay parents? do you think it might be easier for them if their classmate saw a film about different families? and kids will know that their classmate has two moms or two dads
wouldn't it also be better that your children understand that while they have a mom and a dad, some have two moms or two dad or only one parent?
that way they don't mistreat another student out of confusion

What else would you suggest if not the film?
what about for younger kids?
should this be only for classes that do have children with gay parents?

I just wanted to re direct my point. what if your child is going to school with a classmate whose parents are gay?
how do you and the school handle it to ensure there is no bullying or misconceptions

I agree that you may not need to draw attention to these children and there families. but I don't see how no one notices. when they talk about what they did over the weekend, or how they don't celebrate mothers day or fathers day the way others do. I really don't know how the subject wouldn't arise.

Answer 1

With any type of controversial family situation, the best way to keep everyone in "sync" is to talk about it. While everyone's opinons will vary, "your" child is the one "you" concentrate on. Afterall, love and acceptance of people, gay or not, is what is important. This couple has made a commitment to one another, and also a commitment to be parents. With so many broken marriages these days, I think for the better interest of the child, I would much rather them have two adults to look up to who provide, protect, and give unconditional love.

Do I think movies would help? Yes
Do I think discussions help? Yes
Do I think that these need to be age appropriate? Yes, it depends on when other children start asking questions, that's when you begin. When they are so young, sometimes a "simple" answer is better, no need to elaborate too much, but it does need to be addressed, with so many gay couples adopting, the chances of this occuring to any child in any school is a possibility (the friend who's parents are gay)

On the flip side, there are also children born to couples where one chooses to change their sexual preference and leaves the marriage. How do we address this? As with anything else, if we don't talk about it, communicate, situations become clouded, buried, and misunderstood.

This is 2007, we need to start acting like it!

Answer 2

I really don't think that this would be an issue with children unless it was MADE an issue by adults/teachers. Most kids are too wraped up in their own world to even notice stuff like this. If you played a little "video" about the subject or otherwise brought it to the attention of the class/school, you would make it so much harder for the child. If you said, "look class, Jimmy has 2 dads, and that's okay!" you would just be setting him up for wedgies for atleast the rest of the year.

SAD but true story:

I remember when I was in middle school, we all had a friend who always wore a hat, and didn't have any hair. I always wondered why he was allowed to wear a hat, and no one else was. We all liked him and never thought anything of it. Then one day the school had a big assembly and showed a Charlie Brown special about children with cancer. Well, it didn't take long for the kids to put 2 and 2 together, and lets just say his life wasn't "better" after the video.

My point: Don't draw attention to an issue that kids aren't making an issue of.

Answer 3

Some of you are the reason I'm often ashamed to be a part of the human species. "Less than ideal circumstances" my ***. "Less than ideal circumstances" is parents who are married only because they have children but hate each other and the life they live anyway. "Less than ideal circumstances" is living in abject poverty despite your parents working their hardest to better your life. "Less than ideal circumstances" is growing up being taught only hatred and bigotry. In fact the last one might actually be qualified as child abuse in my book. I cannot see how having two loving parents is in anyway "less than ideal", I don't care if your mother is a hamster and your father was a toad. If they love you and love each other then there's nothing about your life that's any less ideal than the life led by children of upper middle-class white suburban heterosexuals who are married. Unfortunately I think that no matter what movements we start or what reforms we try to initiate "family" will always be taught in public schools as one white man and one white female, married with 2.5 kids, a dog, and a house in the 'burbs with a postage stamp sized yard. If you don't fit that description then be prepared to teach your children at home that their family life is just as valid and healthy and loving as anyone else's. That's just an unfortunate fact of life.

EDIT: I just read all of them and I wanted to mention that if your students are above 4th grade...then they probably at least suspect something. Personally I remember knowing in late elementary school and early middle school that one or more of the teachers were gay. Parents, teachers, cafeteria workers, office staff, they're all human. They gossip and forget that the little ears are EVERYWHERE. One kid is all it takes to here it and in 10-15 minutes the whole upper grades know that Mr. Smith the computer teacher has a special male friend.

Answer 4

Am I the only one that realizes that watching a video or even.. HEAVEN FORBID,,,, being exposed to the gay lifestyle in any way WILL NOT make your child gay? While I do agree that 3rd grade may be too soon for some children to learn about it, they are going to find out sooner or later. Lets get a grip people. I fear for the kids of some of these parents if they ever have a need to come out. Yikes.

Answer 5

Man, how very, very sad some of these responses.

This world is made up of all different sorts of relationships - gay, straight, interracial, big, small, and even multiple partners.

Why is it so wrong to treat kids with honesty?? Since when is it disgusting to teach kids that some kids have two moms, two dads, or one of each, or just ONE! Youre not promoting heterosexuality, homosexuality, or divorce by showing them tolerance to diversity, good lord! So you dont agree wtih a lifestyle - don't participate! But NOT teaching our kids that these relationships exist only furthers hatred and confusion. Why would anyone want that?

And trust me, if you tell your 3rd grader that some kids have two moms (or two dads), they really arent going to become influenced by that lifestyle as a result, lol - c'mon now.

Anyway, education begins at home. Teaching tolerance of diversity is an uphill battle, but something very worth while. You can teach your child better than anyone by example :o)

Good luck! :o)

Answer 6

What a difficult job you have! But, so nice to know you care! I Do not know the answer,and would love to know. All I can say, in my opinion, most Gay couples who took on that roll, were already, prepared for "THIS".They lived it and knew. Yet, LOVE will conquer all, that is most important! If a child is raised "with love", He/She will succeed. It wasn't as if someone didn't use birth control or something was "unwanted"! They "ARE" wanted, and that is what makes it "SO DIFFERENT", to us "UNWED" mothers and Abortionists! Just Let them Live and be Loved!

Answer 7

60 years ago we didn't want our kids to know about "The Blacks". Now we don't want to educate our children about "The Gays". Man, you people are living in the wrong society. Move to a deserted island and get bent.

I think all children should learn about EVERYTHING in life. You have to teach them about child molesters, even though you hope they never meet one. You have to teach them about drugs, even though you hope they never take them. You need to teach them about other kinds of people and their beliefs, even if you disagree with them.

No one is suggesting that we show a Gay Pride Parade video to Mrs. Johnson's third grade homeroom. But don't underestimate them by assuming that if you do not teach them about life, they won't learn it anyway. They have the right to know why Chase's mom is white and his dad is black. They have the right to know why Amy only lives with her mom. They have the right to know why Michael and Jason don't have any parents, just grandparents. And they have the right to know why Jenna has two dads.

I don't know how a video would properly address all of that. But I'm not a producer. It's a shame that a video would even be necessary to explain what should be explained AT HOME. Good question though!

Answer 8

The parents are more likely to react to this sinuation. Children learn a lot from there parents the best thing to do is let you child know that they should not judge people.

Answer 9

Rather one believes the gay lifestyle right or wrong, don't you think that it best that we raise our children to be traditionalists? Gay lifestyles bring with them a lot of pain and apprehension. I don't think the classroom should be the place to teach anything other than conventional mores.

For those children whose parents are gay, it should be up to the parents to add to what is being taught at school - not the other way around.

Answer 10

I think kids should be taught about different types of families.I have a 5 yr old son and he knows that some boys like boys and girls like girls and thats okay just like it is ok for a boy to like a girl. Thats as far as i feel we need to get into it now, but when he asks more questions, he will get more answers. Thisis how the world is and we need to create tolerant children.