my mom has changed in the past 7 years. she was a recovering alcoholic, great job, very professional &family oriented for years, well in the past 7 she started drinking again got in2 several drunken car accidents, went on probation, & now 4 the last one that she amazingly survived she might get jail time. well my step father who is a saint & has been with us 4ever (hes the reason she got clean in the 1st place) always stands by her & they fight all the time but still he stands by probably 4 my 13 year old sister, well he had a heart attack recently & the night he came hoem from the hospital my mom goes to AA & then out w/ her BIKER friends til after midnight & said she needed 2 relieve stress. HUH!! so needless 2 say the woman i once looked up to & admired has gone 2 far & i wrote her the nastiest (yet loving if that makes sense) letter telling her shes destroying the family!! well she hasnt talked 2 me since i gave it 2 her & now i regret it. did i do the right thing?
2007-02-06 08:25:52 · 9 answers · asked by toolate 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
she was never this person i think it was midlife crisis! btu i know shes scared about jail, she was scared she almost lost my dad, shes embarassed etc and she did stop drinking (for now) but i felt liek someone had to say something because she wasnt listening to my dad anymore and i dotn want my little sister watching her mom throw her life away!! should i apologize or stick to my guns~~shes has ALWAYS been there for me and she continues to do everything for me i feel like i betrayed her but shes not the person i know as mom AT ALL!! what should i do?
2007-02-06 08:28:13 · update #1
im 25 years old married and one child and one on the way, so im no teenager anymore
2007-02-07 00:40:01 · update #2
She needs to hit rock bottom again before anyone can do anything for her. Jail might do her some good. I hate to say that, but it's true. She really needs to get in to a program or something. That's really all I can tell you.
Oh yeah, you did the right thing. Just the wrong time I think. But, that's ok. You're not the problem here, she is. Don't beat yourself up.
2007-02-06 08:33:43 · answer #1 · answered by Gasman 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Am I right in assuming your 13 year old sister is younger than you, so you have spent more time around your mom. You have every right to feel the way you do. You should express how you feel and try to be respectful but honest and maybe you could go to a few meetings for teen family members of alcoholics or the other support group for children of alcoholics they help you deal with these type of things. It wont be easy but you can learn how to work on your relationship with your mom.
2007-02-06 08:34:55 · answer #2 · answered by ms_sweet_real 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well personally I think you did the right thing. When someone who has looked up to you and admired you, especially your own daughter tells you the truth about yourself it can make her face reality it's probably the best thing for her. Now you take the second step. Talk to her. Tell her that you love her and that she has to stop doing these things and see what she says. You may even want to try counseling or therapy. Good luck hon!
2007-02-06 08:32:12 · answer #3 · answered by April 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey you do whatever God has told you is rite!!!!!!!Pray every nite for him to tell you and no offense but your mom needs to grow up and take responsability for her actions she now has to realize that she has a family to take care of and is now letting you guys down! The only reason that she is mad at you is because you told her the truth and the truth really does hurt! Everything will be allright I promise just TRUST IN GOD and he will help you! And i know that i probably sound kinda dorky telling you to trust in God but he is the only one that has the power to make her realize what she is doing K!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! If you need more help e-mail me k!!!!!!!!!
2007-02-06 08:37:42 · answer #4 · answered by snow_bunniey 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You did the right thing-she was out of control and someone needed to make her listen. You should sit her down and talk about it-maybe she felt it was harsher than you thought. Talk to her because she is clearly going through something and needs someone to lean on. Good luck!
2007-02-06 08:32:14 · answer #5 · answered by Annie 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You did the right thing thing IF you did it as you said u did.She won't talk to anyone cuz she will not own up to what she still does, and she is scared herself. She needs love, guidance and a shrink ASAP!!!!!!!!!
2007-02-06 08:32:08 · answer #6 · answered by rhonda_seiler 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's not your place to tell an adult how to live their life. You need to just do what you need to do and grow up to be a responsible person.
2007-02-06 08:29:14 · answer #7 · answered by janicajayne 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hopefully she hasn't said anything to you because she's ashamed. It's not because she resents you. If my son told me this, and I knew I was screwing up, I wouldn't resent him. I know I would feel ashamed. Good for you for always looking up.
2007-02-06 08:30:24 · answer #8 · answered by Brandnewshoes 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell here
2007-02-06 08:29:27 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋