One bright, beautiful Sunday morning, everyone in tiny Jonestown wakes up early and goes to their local church. Before the service starts, the townspeople sit in their pews and talk about their lives and their families.
Suddenly, at the altar, Satan appears!! Everyone starts screaming and running for the front entrance, trampling each other in their determined efforts to get away from Evil Incarnate. Soon, everyone is evacuated from the church except for one man, who sit calmly in his pew, seemingly oblivious to the fact that God's ultimate enemy is in his presence. This confuses Satan a bit. Satan walks up to the man and says, "Hey, don't you know who I am?" The man says, "Yep, sure do."
Satan says, "Well, aren't you afraid of me?" The man says, "Nope, sure ain't."
Satan, perturbed, says, "And why aren't you afraid of me?" The man says, "Well, I've been married to your sister for 25 years."
2007-02-06 07:55:31 · 18 answers · asked by ♥gigi♥ 7 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
Hahahhah!! Hilarious!! Another good one 10/10
Keep 'em coming!
2007-02-06 08:02:21 · answer #1 · answered by sugarscamp 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In ancient Jewish tradition Satan is simply an angel doing the work that God assigned to Satan to do.
The word Satan means challenger. With the idea of Satan challenging us, or tempting if you will. This description sees Satan as the angel who is the embodiment of man's challenges. This idea of Satan works closely with God as an integral part of Gods plan for us. His job is to make choosing good over evil enough of a challenge so that it becomes clear to us that there can be only one meaningful or logical choice.
Contrast this to Christianity, which sees Satan as God's opponent. In Jewish thought, the idea that there exists anything capable of setting itself up as God's opponent would be considered polytheistic or setting up the devil to be an equally powerful polarity to god or a demigod.
Oddly, proof for The Christian satan/devil mythology is supposedly found in the ancient Jewish texts that were borrowed to create the bible. One can’t help but wonder how Christians came up with such a fantastically different interpretation of Gods assistant Satan in their theology.
Other hints about Satan’s role in human relations can be seen if you look at the name Lucifer. It’s meaning in the original tongue translates as Light bearer or light bringer. Essentially the bringer of enlightenment. The temptations of the Satan idea bring all of us eventually into Gods light. Hardly the Evil entity of Christian mythology.
Love and blessings
don
2007-02-06 09:25:06 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
lol
A friend was in front of me coming out of church one day, and the preacher was standing at the door as he always is to shake hands. He grabbed my friend by the hand and pulled him aside.
The Pastor said to him, "You need to join the Army of the Lord!"
My friend replied, "I'm already in the Army of the Lord, Pastor."
Pastor questioned, "How come I don't see you except at Christmas and Easter?"
He whispered back, "I'm in the secret service.
2007-02-06 08:01:54 · answer #3 · answered by 00100 1 · 8⤊ 0⤋
ooops read that one before still good - 2 8/10
2007-02-06 08:40:08 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Good one Gigi.!!!
10/10.!!!
2007-02-06 09:29:07 · answer #5 · answered by JAM123 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
nice one
2007-02-06 08:18:08 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Packer! I love this one! lol
2007-02-06 08:10:34 · answer #7 · answered by Boo 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
haha nice one, where do u get all these?
2007-02-06 08:58:30 · answer #8 · answered by munkees92 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Satanic laugh....... great one...... where do u get all these laughing bombs?
2007-02-06 08:02:58 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
that's funny
2007-02-06 08:08:45 · answer #10 · answered by soulangel98 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋