I would really appreciate serious advice on this topic, please.?

Question

I have been with my current boyfriend for a little over 5 months. For the last two weeks, he and I have talked only twice. I haven't seen him in 3 weeks. Our relationship has been kind of shaky because of this.
On Saturday and (Super Bowl) Sunday I got to hang out with one of my really close friends. He is an ex of mine from a few years ago. As of late, he's been talking to me about how much he misses me and how he regrets us breaking up. He would like for me to give us another chance; I really want to, and I've been thinking about breaking up with my current boyfriend because he and I never get to see each other.
I love both of these men. They both love me back.
What should I do?
Should I stay with my current boyfriend and hope he cleans up his act, or should I give my ex another chance?
Please help me.
Thank you.

My ex and I broke up because there was another girl that he had liked for a long time and he wanted to get with her. After he broke up with me, he felt horrible and has ever since. He promises me that all he wants is me and that he's not going to let anyone come between us this time.
I've been thinking about breaking up with my current boyfriend for a while now.

I have tried calling my current boyfriend every night for the past two weeks. I've tried everything I can think of to salvage this relationship. He's never home to pick up the phone.

Answer 1

Is this about being in a relationship or about doing whats best for you? I think that if you dig a little deeper, you may find two different answers here. It seems like neither guy is going to get you what you want in the end. The guy your with doesn't meet certain needs and your ex is filling in the gaps by giving you attention and making you feel wanted (what your current guy is NOT immediately giving you). He's providing some much needed gratification that you've been looking for the past 3 weeks while your current beau has been otherwise occupied.

But remember...he IS your ex for a reason...can you (or have you allowed yourself to) recall why?

Maybe enough time has passed that he has grown up and your relationship might work...but as they say, the best predictor of future behavior is past behavior.

Don't forget, you have other options besides your current guy or your ex. This is obviously weighing heavily on your mind...for such an important decision why not give it some time. Why would you have to go from one guy directly to the next? Do you feel like taking a break from your current and your ex (with an open invitation to continue something when you feel like you are ready) is an option? If either are seriously interested in persuing a healthy, meaningful relationship with you, taking time for yourself won't jepordize their commitment--try to keep that in mind. If they try to sell you on "now or never"...I'd question why.

We often lose our insight and objectivity when we find ourselves enbedded in emotional situations like this. I find its a good exercise to practice objectivity by pretending you were giving a friend advice on the same subject and see what you would suggest to her...you may find your own advice is the best for you after all.

That's just my two cents. I encourage you to figure out what is best for you and your life by thinking on this a little more. Good luck to you!

Answer 2

Which boyfriend you should go for is not really the question.
The question should be why are you in the place you are in?
You say that you and your current boyfriend barely talked. however, you never explained why. Is there a particular reason you and him are not talking much? Is he having carrer problems? Is he having family issues?
And as for your ex... why did you guys break up in the first place if he is really great? If he did something like dump you for another girl or if he cheated, then NEVER take him back. but if he had a commitment issue that he is over now, maybe give him another chance.
but the most important thing is how YOU feel? who makes you happiest? who makes you more at home? who can you imagine spending the rest of your life with? who you feel is the person you want to go hom to at the end of the day?
If you honestly cannot answer any of the above questions. then it is time to take a break from both of these men and spend some alone time or maybe girl time with some friends or some family time, but to get away and think about what you want.
Also have a sit-down conversation with your current boyfriend, to figure out what you guy's problem is. Especially if you are sure he loves you and you love him.
hope that was helpful. good luck

Answer 3

try to think about your current relationship on it's own. if there wasn't another guy waiting in the wings, would you still break up with your current boyfriend? or are these communication problems a serious indication that it is time to break up?

i never let a 2nd girl interfere with my existing relationship. if you do break up with the guy you are with, make sure it is for the right reasons, and not just because the grass looks greener on the other side.

also, if he is an ex, then there must have been a reason you broke up in the first place. a second change with an old partner doesn't always work... be careful before you give up on something that might be a good thing

Answer 4

I would say it's time for a serious talk with your boyfriend. Is there a good reason you haven't seen or talked to each other much, or is he just not making the time for you? If he's just not making the time, then maybe he doesn't care enough about you to be worth salvaging the relationship. You need to find out from him, though, what's been going on. If you DO end your current relationship, just be sure you do it because you want to end the relationship...not because there's someone else in the wings.

Answer 5

give the ex another chance. what is the point in being with someone if you only talk once a week and never get to see each other? how can you build a strong relationship that way? you cant. my advice to you would be dump the current guy and go back to the old. it sounds to me like you kind of think the same thing.

Answer 6

If you've only talked a couple of times over the last few weeks then you have already started to distance yourself....so...there is your answer...had you not pulled away from your current boyfriend you would have distanced yourself from the ex...you are looking to validate your reason for dumping the poor sap when you don't really need to...you've already made your mind up...now just get your mouth to do the talking...and don't play both these guys for suckers...dump one of them...save yourself some drama and trouble..

Answer 7

Loving both of them isnt the problem. Take a look out side of it for a sec. Sit back and think" who would i be most satisfied married to" Take all pionts into account ;parents/family,job, friends, lifestyle, baggage. do the pros n' cons list. if its close, just uncomplicate your life and dich them both. Close is an indication of both of them are alright, and you need great.
BTW
the ex effect is a tragic thing . Try to remember why you split in the first place. It may help.
If the current BF has no time for you......He has no time for you!

Answer 8

Sounds like the current boyfriend has given up by not fighting for you. When people are in love they want to be around each other or at least talking.

Answer 9

It sounds as though he's already moved on if he's seeing somebody else, and if he says he isn't soft coming lower back to the rustic then it does not sound as though there is something you're able to do. there is obviously a clarification why you adult adult males chop up up, so at the same time as you're having difficulty moving on attempt to maintain that throughout the time of techniques. there grew to become right into a concern, and it of course wasn't some thing that the two considered one of you will possibly desire to over come jointly.

Answer 10

Sounds like you've already made up your mind. My only advice is to break up with your current b/f BEFORE Starting anything with your ex.