I'm writing a feature about including grandparents/aunts/uncles in family life. I'm interested in hearing from anyone who may not have had the perfect relationship with their parents/siblings but made an effort anyway to include them in family life - with positive results. How did you overcome difficulties? What are the benefits to you/them/the kids?
2007-02-06 07:10:33 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
I suffered at the hands of my parents for 20 years, but for the sake of my children, have developed a working relationship with them both. I would never leave my kids with them alone, but they dote on their grandkids, and my dad has made it plain that he regrets our abusive childhood and wants to have a good relationship with my kids and me - it's made me able to truly forgive him, something my childless sister can never do or understand...
2007-02-06 07:16:42 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
My dad and I do not really have a good relationship anymore (we once did). But, I have two boys now and I do want them to know who their Grandpa is. However, I do not get together with him on a regular basis. He is included for birthdays and holiday celebrations but that is really about it. I feel that if he wants more involved in their lives, he can call and ask to come over or we can go out, etc., but until then, it will stay like it is.
On the other hand, my husband's parents are totally different. They are very involved in my sons' lives and their world revolves around their grandchildren. I think they know that life is short and any opportunity to be with their grandchildren, they take.
2007-02-11 09:52:51 · answer #2 · answered by m 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have had problems with my mother and my in-laws in the past buy I try to involve them in our family life as much as possible. I have a 3 year old and a 10 month and they are close with both sets of grandparents and have benefited from these relationships.
2007-02-06 07:18:03 · answer #3 · answered by Miriam Z 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My parents and grandparents all passed.
My fieances are aloive and a waste of space.
They cannot be bothered with our girls unless there is some financial gain.
My daughter almost 5 is always asking why grandma and grandpa can't be nice and what she did wrong.
Now thats the part that really hurts she did nothing wrong.
They abused each and every one of thier kids mentally and emotionally and thought they could do the same with ours.
my sister is the only one who has anything to do with these poor kids without having to be paid for it.
one of thier uncles thinks he needs to show 4 year olds pornagraphy. He comes back to our house and he is a dead ***.
2007-02-10 13:57:57 · answer #4 · answered by andreamarie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have a very difficult relationship with my mum, and at the age of 14 i was put into foster care. I have 2 kids of my own and although she lives 350 miles away, i always make sure my kids speak to her when she calls, and she comes round to see them when she is in the area, about 4 times a year.
I still wish that i could do the same with my dad and sister, but at least i have not included my kids in the battle between me and my mum.
2007-02-06 07:16:18 · answer #5 · answered by ? 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My father has a very close relationship with my daughter along with my brother and sister. However my mother in law and I don't get a long at all and she is very irrational and can be violent so I only allow her "supervised" visitations and she doesn't like this idea so she doesn't get to see her granddaughter very often. The only way she wants to see her is if she gets to take her and I am very uncomfortable with that but I do want my daughter to know both of her grandparents.
2007-02-06 07:19:00 · answer #6 · answered by mdoud01 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well as much as they can be... my mom died before the kids were born, my father has other priorities in life, and I care not to involve him in their life... Their fathers parents are gone already, both died of Cancer 2 yrs ago...and the other set (my daughter is from a 2nd relationship) doesn't see her to often. The are not a close knit family as my mom and stepdad/parents were...Times are changing for the worse I'm afraid to say.. Ppl are just too busy ...
2007-02-14 02:02:09 · answer #7 · answered by momof3 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
my mother was a terrible mother, but she is a fantastic grandma my boys adore her and she them,and this makes me respect her for making an effort to put things right. My boys will kiss her etc when we leave which is something i cannot bring myself to do, so i think she is glad of that and she see's the situation as a way to make up to me the things she did when i was a child.
my dad however is not allowed any part in my kids lives.... he was abusive, but i didnt tell anyone till 12 months ago, he had a good relationship with my kids but obviously they were never left alone with him, when everything came out though, i had no choice but tto cut him out of all our lives..the boys havnt seemed to notice though...he was more of a fun grandad than someone they have great love and affection for, like their grandma
2007-02-10 00:13:28 · answer #8 · answered by slsvenus 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I had a diffcult relationship with my parents before my son was born...I didn't even have to make the effort to make things right. They did. M mom watches my son 2 days a week while I'm at work, and he always phones them every night before he goes to bed to say goodnight. My son brought my parents and I back together as a family.
2007-02-06 07:19:28 · answer #9 · answered by mommy_2_liam 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My parents are very close to my kids and so is my nan their great gran I dread to think how they will take it when she passes away she is nearly 91 and not in the best of health. I see my sister and her kids all the time as well. It is very important to have close family as i found out when my husband had his accident nearly 3 years ago. Its a shame he has no close family though
2007-02-07 00:26:37 · answer #10 · answered by JULIE S 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋