So my bf is 37, I’m turning 18 march 10th, and it seems like all he is using me is for is sex. We’ve been together for a year and 2 months. Sometimes it feels like its real love, and maybe he’s just a nymph, but because I find myself questioning it so much, I don’t know what to think.
He says he loves me but we have never gone OUT like on a date,(maybe to sonic drive through, never gone to the movies, never have I come over and just chilled but once or twice.
Every time I go over to his place it leads straight to the bedroom whether I want to or not
he may call me but once every so often(We mostly text) do you think he's using me cause I’m young and gullible? I figured everything would change when I turn 18, but the older I get the more my eyes open. Any personal experiences?
2007-02-06 06:24:25 · 25 answers · asked by *Bella Reveuse* 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Yeah, that definitely sounds sketchy. I'd get rid of him...you're going to be 18 soon and you have your whole life ahead of you...and any man that isn't willing to "show you off to the world" isn't worth your time anyway.
2007-02-06 06:28:35 · answer #1 · answered by good luck 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Let's see... he's been seeing you since he was 35 or 36, and you were SIXTEEN! First of all, he's lucky he hasn't been charged with statutory rape.
Sweetheart, what are you thinking? He's never taken you out on a real date, you go over to his place and straight to bed. Do you have anything in common with this guy? He's not a nymph, he's a horndog, and a year and a half ago he was a PREDATOR. (The age of consent changes from state to state, but here in Texas it is 17).
Twelve years ago I met a girl. I was 34 at the time and she said she was 19. We hit it off physically very quickly and that part of me was satisfied, but there was no mental connection. Worse, I found out pretty quickly that she was actually 17. While she was technically legal, I was a bit shocked. We split up very quickly. The relationship would not have lasted anyway because we couldn't talk about much, but the idea that she was, in my mind "jailbait" made me break it off. She was upset, but I just couldn't go on.
End it now. Find someone who will treat you the way you deserve to be treated.
2007-02-06 07:02:50 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I didn't have to read after the first line (i did though) to understand that YOU KNOW what the answer is to your own question :
When the words come out of your mouth such as "It seems like all he is using me is for sex," or "SOMETIMES it feels like it's real love and MAYBE HE'S JUST A NYMPH, because i find myself questioning it so much. . . " or "never gone out on a date", "chilled once or twice" (and even then it's "straight to the bedroom"), "he may call me every once or so often (we mostly text)" .....errr need i say more?! U KNOW WHAT TO DO.
Girl you are too young to be even worrying about a situation like this. Learn to live your life by having fun with people YOUR AGE (no one is going to understand u better then the people your age) Grow with them, chill with them and learn from them (their mistakes anyhoo). Girl u know exactly what is the thing to do, do it girl and watch your life will be so much better when it comes to relationships.
OH! If anything DO LEARN TO RESPECT yourself as a woman, don't let men take advantage of you, your too good as a human being for that, ok?
2007-02-06 06:50:42 · answer #3 · answered by queline24 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Girl that is not a relationship.. that is just a man getting his kicks out of a semi-friendship with privilages, with a young girl. He is not interested in you in a real relationship, because he assumes your not mature enough for that. And him being around already through a lot, well doesn't want a serious relationship with someone who is barely starting to expirence life. BUT he sure loves to get into your pants! What man wouldn't!.. especially why buy the cow, when you can get the milk for free! HE is cheap bastard, and knows you'll settle for a 99 cents hamburger at sonic.. get some backbone girl and know you are worth more than that. I'm sure someone else would be proud to walk next to you, and show you off to his friends, and family and take you out to nicer resturants. LEAVE him completely.. he is only there, because you let him have his cake and eat it too.
2007-02-06 06:40:28 · answer #4 · answered by MOON13 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sorry to tell you this, but he's using you. I was in a 2 year relationship with a woman almost half my age(I was 37 when we met, she was 19), and I truly loved her..and I showed it. I wasn't ashamed of our relationship, and I made it obvious. The sex was awesome, but that was only a small part of the relationship. I loved her because she was a sweet, bright, beautiful woman. I sent her flowers. I introduced her to my friends and family. I bragged about her. I wanted to spend as much time as I could with her. That is what you do when you truly love/care about someone. He doesn't love you. I'm sorry for being so blunt, but I think you need to hear it the way that it is.
2007-02-06 06:39:38 · answer #5 · answered by throwdown67 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, you are young and gullible. And he is old and creepy.
First, there is no excuse for a grown man to be having sex with a 17 year old. Regardless of how mature for her age she is. This is illegal, period.
Second, if you refused sex, how long would the relationship last? Answer this and you will get a good indication of what his priorities are.
But you already know all this, don't you?
Maybe you aren't as gullible as you think you are.
2007-02-06 06:30:22 · answer #6 · answered by lilrubberducky 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are hereby instructed to leave this guy in your exit dust. He is taking advantage big time. He doesn't want to be seen with you because of the big age difference, but he is obviously in it just for the sex - he doesn't love you or he would be proud to be seen with you. Get out now before you invest any more time and more of yourself for his gratification! Good luck and be a little more careful next time - don't date anyone more than 25 years old for starters.
2007-02-06 06:32:07 · answer #7 · answered by Doug R 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yeah, you're going to receive a lot of "No sh*t sherlocke" type of answers and yeah, you deserve them. it's kind of hard to take you seriously when you're this naïve but yeah, you're being used. it's something to pity that you mentioned that it leads to the bedroom whether you want to or not and it's called rape... it makes it even worse since you are underage. you really need to find someone who cares for you and YOUR age. a lot of girls your age have this really stupid mentality that guys their own age are "too immature" and yet older guys aren't much better.
this guy is abviously taking the upmost advantage of you... he seems to like them young and i am guessing once you hit 18... things will die down since he won't find you appetizing anymore. you need to really think it through and you'll find the guy loves sex, not you. it's harsh and no one likes being told they are used, but you are being used and abused. you know that leaving him would be the smartest thing to do, but it's up to you to take teh first step towards doing the right thing. hopefully you do it sooner rather than later.
2007-02-06 06:32:41 · answer #8 · answered by melloncollieromance 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No personal experience with this situation here, but if you've been together for a year and two months, and you haven't gone out on an actual date, then yeah, something's up...
2007-02-06 06:27:40 · answer #9 · answered by F.J. 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Hey girl! My b-day is march 10th too! I'll be 18 too! but ya i think he's using you, i know your in love but, he's obviously takin advantage of you, so either force him to come hang out in public, or when you go to hang with him, refuse everything that leads to the bedroom...if he can't handle it, he's not good enough for ya!
i know it's gonna be tough! good luck!
2007-02-06 06:29:55 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋