Help! My almost 5 yr old is potty- lazy, any suggestions?

Question

I've tried rewards,punishment everything!! She gets so busy playing or doesn't want to get up to go pee while sleeping. She holds it as long as she can then she pees a little in her pants. If she can't make it, she'll sit on the floor and wiggle and cry, sometimes in front of the toilet. So frustrating!! She has no medical problems. She holds poop too and if she has diarrea, same thing.So tired of cleaning sheets and underwear!! This happens several times a day more so than not. I think its a control issue and I don't know what to do anymore. Please help, out of ideas...thanks so much.

She does not have full blown accident. She just leaks a little. She doesn't have a problem going to the bathroom, only going when she has to and yes she knows when she has to go because she makes efforts to hold it via wiggling, squatting etc. Add no its not a small bladder because she holds it for hours(up to 5)

Answer 1

If you are absolutely certain that she has no medical condition then my guess is that it is a control issue. What happens when she does this? Is she getting some extra attention from you when this happens? Are there any recent changes in her life (move, new baby, family stress, new school)? If there are, she could be stressed or she may be doing so because she is feeling out of control and found something in her life that she can control because only she has power over it.

Make sure she is wearing clothing that she can easily get on and off without help. When you notice her wiggling, say to her "It looks like you need to use the bathroom." If she wets herself, hold her responsible for the clean up. Stop changing her. If you see that she has soiled herself, say to her “It looks like you need to change.” Give it no more attention than that. She can remove the soiled clothing, rinse them out, put them in the laundry, clean herself and any wet area, and put on clean clothing. When she wets her bed, have her remove the sheets and put them in the laundry. She can also help remake the bed. Also, make sure she uses the bathroom before bedtime and limit fluids at least two hours before bedtime. Children who sleep very soundly will often wet the bed. Make sure she is getting enough sleep during the night so she is not sleeping so soundly and not able to wake when she needs to use the bathroom. You may also consider getting her some Goodnites (sort of like Pull-ups for bed wetters) to help her feel when she is going during the night.

Help her to feel powerful by saying things like “You did that without any help!” “You can jump super high!” “You did that so neatly!” “Look how many colors you used on your picture!” These types of phrases are much more affective than using rewards such as stickers or treats. They are great confidence builders, great ways to help her feel powerful, and great ways to show attention.

Find things for her to do at home where she has control. She can help you prepare dinner or a snack, help with siblings (if any), help with grocery shopping, pick out her clothing, and “adult-like” activities. She will feel proud to help and glad to have some control in positive ways. Hope this helps! Best of luck to you!

Answer 2

it is not your education it rather is the concern so please do not sense to blame over this. in the beginning at that age enjoying is soooo very lots extra significant then going potty. by the time he realizes that he needs to urgently flow it is too previous due and has an twist of destiny. do not in basic terms remind him that he needs to flow potty. Use a kitchen timer in his play section and set it for as quickly as an hour. while it is going off he HAS to flow take a seat on the potty and attempt. do not recommend it, tell him he will or he loses the toy he's fidgeting with. he will rapidly learn that the toy remains there waiting for him while he's finished. yet another element is to place on the compliment every time he does use the potty. Lay it on advantageous and thick! My son had began getting lax with attending to the potty on time and the better compliment grew to become into all he needed to get inspired lower back. maximum sons and daughters love the valuable interest and could do in spite of it grew to become into that triggered it.

Answer 3

You said that she has no medical problems. I would really wonder about that. If you have taken her to a physician, did he/she really take you seriously enough and do exams to find out if there was a cause? There are medications that can help. Fecal incontinence shouldn't be happening to a child this age. If your physician isn't helping, I would see another physician for a second opinion. Sometimes it takes some time to get a physician who understands and will listen.

Answer 4

My 6 year old nephew still wears pull-ups to bed at night. He does good in the day he never has accidents.My sister took him to the doctors and they said his blatter is small and not fully developed.He takes some kind of medicine for it everyday a couple times a day and he's not aloud to drink a few hours before bed and it seems to be working.Mabey you should take her to the doctors and see what they say. Good luck.