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Did you hear about the heavyset guy who had tried every diet in the world in an attempt to lose weight? He tried the Scarsdale diet, the Navy diet, Weight Watchers, and many more. None worked. One day, he was reading the Washington Post when he noticed a small ad which read:

Lose weight

Only $1.00 a pound

Call (202) 208-0238

The man decided to give it a try and called the number. A voice on the other end asked, 'How much weight do you want to lose?', to which the man responded, 'Ten pounds.' The voice replied, 'Very well, give me your credit card number and we'll have a representative over to your house in the morning.'

About 9:00 am the next morning the man gets a knock on the door. There stood a beautiful redheaded woman, completely naked except for a sign around her neck stating, 'If you catch me, you can have me'.

Well, the hefty fellow chased her upstairs, downstairs, over sofas, through the kitchen, all around the house. Finally, panting and wheezing like a dog, he did catch her. When he was through enjoying himself, she said, 'Quick, go into the bathroom and weigh yourself!'. He did just that and was amazed to find that he had lost ten pounds, right to the ounce!

That evening he called the number again. The voice on the other end asked, 'How much weight do you want to lose?', to which the somewhat less overweight man replied, 'Twenty pounds.'.

'Very well', the voice on the phone told him, 'Give me your credit card number and we'll have a representative over to your house in the morning.'

At about 8:00 am the next morning the man receives a knock on the door. When he opens the door he sees a beautiful blond dressed only in track shoes and a sign around her neck stating 'If you catch me, you can have me'. The chase took a good while longer this time and the man nearly passed out, but he finally did catch her. When he was through she told him, 'Quick, run into the bathroom and weigh yourself!' He ran to the bathroom and found he had lost another 20 pounds!

'This is fantastic!', he thought to himself. Later that evening he called the number again and the voice at the other end asked, 'How much weight do you want to lose?'. 'Fifty pounds!', the man exclaimed. 'Fifty pounds?', the voice asked. 'That's an awful lot of weight to lose at one time.' The man replied, 'Listen buddy, here's my credit card number, you just have your representative over here in the morning!', and he hung up the phone.

About 6:00 am the next morning the man gets out of bed, splashes on some cologne and gets all ready for the next representative. At about 7:00 am he gets a knock on the door. When he opens the door, he sees this large gorilla with a sign around his neck stating,

'If I catch you, I'm going to scrxw you'

2007-02-06 02:06:47 · 27 answers · asked by Tink 5 in Entertainment & Music Jokes & Riddles

27 answers

NOW THAT IS A JOKE IT HAD ME ROCKING IN MY SEAT TINK 10/10

2007-02-06 02:32:39 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0 1

Excellent

2007-02-06 03:33:09 · answer #2 · answered by wally_zebon 5 · 0 1

It was kind of funny the first time I read it about 6 months ago. But not anymore.

2007-02-06 02:24:28 · answer #3 · answered by sweetgurl13069 6 · 0 2

A bit long, but funny still

2007-02-06 02:11:03 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Heard it b4 but with a gay man - still funny though

2007-02-06 03:11:01 · answer #5 · answered by Rubber * Duckie 4 · 0 1

hahaha great one 10/10& a star

2007-02-06 02:43:57 · answer #6 · answered by anna 7 · 0 1

It was OK it just went on a bit

2007-02-06 02:14:42 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1 0

now that is why you are the princess of jokes i pmsl 10/10

2007-02-06 10:19:13 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0 1

It would have been better if the gorilla was a look alike of Pat Butcher off Eastenders....................but it was funny

2007-02-06 02:21:39 · answer #9 · answered by Pixie_Mummy 5 · 0 1

A very funny ending.That must be a gay gorilla.
Hahahahahehehehehhiihihihihihhhhii

2007-02-06 02:19:10 · answer #10 · answered by laziifrog 5 · 0 1

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