my friend has a problem?

Question

my roomate danielle has been with this guy rob for a while, and she lost her virginity to him, and they were just the cutest, hapiest couple, until one day he decided to cheat on her and it mesed up everything. anyways they have been split up for about 4 months now and danielle started seeing my brother ryan. and they have been together for about 3 months and they seemed to be doing fine. just recently, like the past few weeks danielle has started talking to her ex rob again, through emails and the phone, and it turns out that he misses her like crazy and he cant forgive himself for what he did, and he feels like crap. so with that said, danielle wants to go back with her ex, but she doesnt wanna hurt ryan, and she is also afraid, and confused about making the right decosion. she is just having a really hard time. so if anyone hass ever been in this position and has some advise on what they did, or if anyone just has something to say that might help. i would appriciate it, this girl is going crazy.

Answer 1

Not sure I could forgive someone for cheating on me, once they have done that they are written off entirely to me. I think if they did it once, they will more than likely do it again, but not always. However, if this is something that she wants to do so bad, then she should probably do it, else she will wonder what would have happened if she had made a different choice and given him a second chance.

Answer 2

Listen Danielle’s friend, Rob only feels bad because he got caught. The other girl more than likely has dumped him and he feels that Danielle will take him back. He also more than likely knows she’s seeing Ryan and just wants to mess up her good thing. The best thing Danielle can do is let Rob stay right where he is. She needs to think of it this way, if the shoe was on the other foot and she cheated on Rob what’s the likelihood that he’d forgive her so easily and take her back. He cheated and if she takes him back not only did he cheat but he’s cheated and got away with it which tells him he can continue to do so because every time he does she will let it go and take him back. There’s no excuse for what he’s done as far as cheating and she shouldn’t just brush it off. Tell her to think with her head and not with her heart. She knows deep down inside that he can and will do this to her again. The next time she may not find a Ryan to pick up her pieces and the Ryan she has now may not be there once she falls the next time. Stay with Ryan who’s not cheated on her and who at this time is making her happy. Her being feelings of wanting to be with Rob is only her hormones talking because he was her first. Tell her you never forget your first but there will be others but in her case she should be trying very had to not only forget her first but get away from him because him being her first meant nothing to her if it was so easy for him to trash that by cheating on her.

Answer 3

She should stay where she is at. Rob cheated once, which makes him a candidate to do it again. Hind sight is 20/20. he needs to learn his lesson for future relationships. Guys will say want you want to hear to get what they want, mostly sex. If Danielle goes back with him, not only is she setting herself up for another fall, but she will probably hurt Ryan also.
She should leave Ryan if he is not right for her, or she doesn't love him, that sort of reason. Not for Rob. She has moved on, keep it that way. Most reconciliations end up like the first time.

Answer 4

You need to tell your friend that her ex is an ex because he cheated on her and why would you want someone back that can not respect you enough to not cheat on you( that is not someone who cares about you).

She has this good guy that does not cheat and does not deserve to be second best to a guy that screwed her over. If she cant wake up and see that Ryan is the best one for her then let her burn her bridges with those who really care about her and she will see that mister cheater will do it again they always do!

Once a dog always a dog!

Answer 5

Well, your friend should really not just let Rob back into her life that easy. She can forgive him but just don't forget. Maybe he is totally different and if he is great, but she should just be careful. If she wants to be with him, then she should give it a try. It's always hard with your first. She really needs to be careful about Ryan's feelings too. Maybe she could take this approach......just let him know that she really cares about him, but she doesn't think its fair for him to be with him while she still has feelings for someone else. Well, hope that helps. good luck to your friend!!

Answer 6

First of all family is always first, tell your brother. He was always your brother but she won't always be your friend. Obviously, she doesn't care about him too much, he needs to break it off with her. Second once a cheat always a cheat..she lost her virginity to him, and she is confused, hurt and obviously nieve. She will probably take her ex back but it is her loss. Let her figure this out, the only thing you can do is tell your brother.

Answer 7

**** Rob!!! Once a cheater always a cheater. This sounds like a case of beated wife syndrome. She wants to be liked by the one that hurt her because she needs to be valued. Tell Ryan to value her the way she wants to be. Ryan hasn't screwed up yet...

Answer 8

This is what I would do. I would tell my ex that I forgave him for what he did, but I could not forget it, therefore being back with him would only cause turmoil with the entire relationship which would not be sensible. She needs to be honest with your brother and tell him she is talking to her ex again, but she needs to also sit back and think about how good she has it with an honest man who's not gonna cheat on her. I know she had a great thing with her ex, but she needs to not think about how special the thing was that she had with him because he obviously wasnt thinking about how great it was with her when he cheated. Tell her to keep that in mind and stick with the good guy!

Answer 9

i think she should listen to her heart and go with what she thinks is right. then she should explain to the other guy what her feelings are and that her heart thinks she should go to the other guy. i think she should stay with rob though. then explain to ryan that she is really more closer to rob since they were together for a longer time. he also broke her virginity. she has to explain it to him. he should understand.

Answer 10

This divorce is a loss--identical to the lack of a man or woman in demise--we mourn it , come to grips with it after which transfer on. The divorce demands to be mourned by means of your pal--which will take time--as a lot time because it demands to get beyond it. Life does not quit whilst a divorce happens--all concerned must transfer on of their possess approach. your pal demands to come back to grips and discover that it's an grownup difficulty--he demands to peer it from an grownup potential--or as satisfactory as he can. The mothers and fathers had disorders--they don't seem to be blaming him--he isn't the intent of it. He demands to help whoever is left caring for him--this can be a mutual help. People speaking is BAD TASTE--he demands to disregard it--folks will continuously speak so allow them to be and forget about it. There is not whatever you'll do however be pleasant and supportive--he's a pal and could do the identical for you---steadily do extra social, a laugh matters, no longer too loud or noticeable--simply ease into it. Let him TALK his anger out--no longer battle--inform him it's OK to specific it to you. Just be a well listener. Thanks--well success.