What do you think of this POEM????

Question

Ive written this months ago....
and pls rate it..and be honest.

If I could picture when you start to cry
I would love to kiss each tear that falls..
if a tear falls down your cheek
I would kiss it.
If a tear falls down your lips..
I would kiss it.
But...if you dont cry,and cry from the inside
than I shall kiss your heart for every tear that falls....

Answer 1

you are good, but I will go like this, if you don't mind,

But...if you dont cry out,and you cry in inside
than I shall kiss your heart for every tear that falls....

the rest is mind blowing, keep it going girl you got a gift.

Answer 2

For me a poem has to have rhythm. It would not unavoidably ought to rhyme regardless of the indisputable fact that it needs to hit my thoughts. i imagine readability of expression is major besides. i do not decide on to 2d wager what i'm studying about. I continuously search for what I time period "poetic gemstones"contained in the textual content.

Answer 3

i read it once and thought it was a bit monotone, i read it again and i liked it, i read it a third time and i love the last two lines, very well written i'd say. :] this would make great song lyrics.

Answer 4

ooohhhhhh I'm really impressed! it stimulates one's emotions! You're really got tallent! :-)
i like poems too, i've written some but they're in persian if i translate them they won't be that goood:P
anyway, keep goin
wish 2 see more of yours!
Good Luck ;-)

Answer 5

i ll give it a 9 out of 10 but only because i am jealous!really good

Answer 6

out of 10, i give it a four.

i see where ure gng, but its not gd. sorry babe.
keep trying though! practice makes perfect((:

Answer 7

it's cool and I think you are in love!