ok so we broke up a year ago. yes it was another girl. i would of nvr expected it from him. i was always good to him, and he was always so patient, sweet, & loveable. but he did hurt me REALLY bad. now he's back and he's sorry (still with that girl). he says he nvr stopped loving me, & that all he wants is that friendship we once had, evn b4 we were a couple (we were friends for 4 years b4 he was my bf.) i've always been here 4 him. thru thick n thin, & he wants that again. he says he wants to get together & talk about how everything happend, & why. & even though i'm not IN LOVE with him anymore, i do love him, i'll always care to know that he's ok. but i don't want to get hurt again,& i do want 2 know the truth about things, & i want him 2 know how much he hurt me. i'm glad to hear from him, but it makes me cry to remember all the heartache! shouldnt i B happy if he's happy. is it ok if it still hurts? am i a bad person if i 4give, but cant 4get, is it ok to love eachother n b friends
2007-02-05 20:21:41 · 11 answers · asked by Lolis 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I can speak from personal experience. I have been through this situation, but from the other side. I left a girl that I cared deeply about, but it wasn't working. I gave her some time, and then tried to make it into a friendship. It worked for awhile, but even though she tried, the mixed emotions were too much for her. Eventually she needed to completely break contact, because every time we would communicate all those issues would come up in her mind again. I didn't quite understand, but I respect her wishes. I want her to be happy, and for her it means me having to stay out of her life. So I agreed to. So for your sake I think you need to call the whole thing off, at least until you can think of him without the emotional attachment, if that is ever possible. Good luck.
2007-02-05 20:32:05 · answer #1 · answered by Bob Peppers 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sorry for this but **** him!!! how dare him? he is the same with my ex. He wants you to be his friend? what a cliche? he wants you as a spare tire. He had hurt you and yet he had the face to ask you to be there for him? What a user!!! He had hurt you and wants to talk about it like scratching a healing scar. He doesn't deserve to be your friend he should be a doormat. Sorry for my anger. Just don't be friends with him cause its hurting you more than its helping you. It is alright to forgive but do not ever forget what he did because you will fall for the same trap again. Tell him you can't be friends. You need your peace of mind. You are not a bad person and your reaction is normal. If he was really a friend he won't hurt you in the first place imagine four years of friendship and he cheated on you. So much for friendship he did not even value it. Forget about him. he is a user. Knowing the truth comes along with being hurt. The bottom line if you care for yourself that much time you have spent being with him is enough. Do not put yourself in more trouble.
2007-02-05 20:40:14 · answer #2 · answered by Princess Shai 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i imagine it really is common, yeah. From the way you're writing about this, regardless of the reality that, I even ought to ask your self how a lot is you wanting the *idea* of being in love. "attempting so difficult" seldom works properly - it appears that evidently determined and people can tell, and also you also possibility ending up preserving auditions for actors playing an element: "i decide on someone to be in love with, do you slot the region?" It takes position in its personal time. in case you position your self in positions the position you'll meet a good number of people you want, worst case you'll have better friends and that is not a foul element. really purely supply up attempting, and ensure you're making relationship judgements depending on the way you sense about the *man or woman* extremely than how properly you imagine they could play the region on your existence that you opt on to fill. Relationships are far better priceless with people extremely than roles. :)
2016-12-03 19:10:08 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't do it. Of course he wants you back, and maybe for more than just a friend, and I am sure for less than a gf. You gave him his chance. He lost you and who cares why. Tell him "no thank you. Don't tell him you still love him, or how much he hurt you. No explanation necessary. How could you want to be friends with him knowing him so well and knowing his is putting his thing in the other girl? UCK! His loss, and your blessing you are not stuck with a guy that wants to eat his cake and have it too.
2007-02-05 20:30:59 · answer #4 · answered by lily 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ive been in this situation before. its alright. its like i always say everyone deserves a second chance no matter how bad they screw up. yes i know how bad the pain feels but it was a sign from god that you two just were not ment to be. but being friends with him is better than nothing. just becuase u two are done doenst mean the feelings will go away. sometimes they never do but trust me im sure he felt just as bad as u did when u two broke up even tho he may not have shown it. i would be his friend becasue he deserves one more shot. u cant help how u feel. its a natural emotion but just be careful and dont get in too deep to where u can get hurt again
best of luck to you
2007-02-05 20:27:52 · answer #5 · answered by King Ry 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Run as far away from him as you possibly can and dont make any contact with him. He wants to cheat on her with you and then when you take him back he will use her to cheat on you and it will never stop! Walk away and leave him in your past... you wouldnt eat vomit of a year ago so why the heck would you wanna date a heartbreaker of a year ago!
2007-02-05 20:26:55 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
yeah i no how you feel i was inthe same situation and i am now friends with my ex; and its all gud; but one thing is sure that im not gong to fall in love with him agin even thought he hurt me ; i justd carryed on with life and left him quite a while and then if he splits up with his gf, he will ome crawling back; so fornow just ignore him; and he come running bk to u; hope this helps;
2007-02-05 20:26:55 · answer #7 · answered by teri c 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Shine him on. He doesn't get to have his cake and eat it too.
You can forgive him, but trusting him is another thing entirely and the fact that he's trying to play for both of you is just slimy.
2007-02-05 20:25:13 · answer #8 · answered by tony1athome 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i dont know how you could do it. i couldnt, and risk myself getting hurt again, no way! i say dont do it. let sleeping dogs lie! if you go ahead and get back in contact with him, u will surely end up hurt again. he left you for another girl, i say screw him.
2007-02-05 20:42:54 · answer #9 · answered by braille 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i know how it feels to be like left out!
i already experience to be scared of falling in love again with someone who had hurt me so much...
maybe we can't avoid he feeling that even once in our lives he became part of it especially in your heart...just keep loving...who knows what would happened right?
lay(n_n)
2007-02-05 20:27:12 · answer #10 · answered by lay 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋